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Sunday, April 25, 2010
A New Car is Like a New Manuscript...
I find car shopping not unlike dating…or writing. I had to buy a new-used car. I had my list of requirements for the car: not too expensive, but not the cheapest thing; not gold; and four doors. The first is pretty clear. I want to be able to afford this car, but I’m unwilling to schlep around in a Ford Focus, which we all know is an Escort in disguise. (If you have an Escort and it actually works, congratulations.) The second is that I think gold cars are pimp cars. I am not a pimp. And third, when I was a child, my dad had some two door cars and I hated it because I always had to sit in the back, crawl over a bunch of crap, and sit cramped for hours on end. I am a person who likes her own space and wants the people in her car to enjoy their own space.
I went to the car lot with a friend who actually likes to buy cars, because you should bring positive people when you decide to do something expensive and that you may regret later (like tattoos or childbirth.) We picked out a couple cars that met my criteria; I drove them both; and I picked the one I liked. I said, “I think I will go with this car. I like it.” And she asked, “Do you want to go to another lot and drive more cars?”
In a word, no. I feel once I have found a car I like and think I can commit to for its life, that going around looking for more choices is a lot like dating a really nice guy who laughs at your jokes, remembers your birthday, and is great in bed, but you decide to keep playing the field in case your “soul mate” shows up. A car is a car is a car. And men are pretty much men, no matter how long you hold out looking for that soul mate. I’m not saying that I don’t think Deerhunter isn’t the bees knees or anything, but neither do I expect him to be that Disney version of a soul mate either. I’ve noticed that a lot of things a woman expects out a “soul mate” are usually better and more easily found in your girlfriend, so you’re better off delegating some of your emotional support to other people in your life. No one car can do everything either. If you fell in love with a sedan, don’t be pissed off its not a 4-wheel-drive pickup come winter. You knew that when you bought it. Maybe that’s just me and maybe I’m wrong and a bunch of you will correct me that there are men out there willing to do the girlfriend lunch and bitch about things and be everything. That’s fine.
I realize this has very little to do with writing, except for this: there is no perfect story or story idea. When you first get a story idea, you’re going to sit down with it, tool about town with the top down, and think, “This is the best idea ever!” You can’t imagine this story idea of a car will ever break down on the highway or start emitting a funny sound around the 50,000 mile mark that makes you wonder if it’s going to make it to the 100,000 mark, which you were promised. Which you need it to do because you need to turn this book in, completed! Trading in your story idea car for a new one before you get the last one paid off only kicks you in the ass in the long run. You know what happens if you keep trading up for the “better and newer” car right? You end up paying more money on the new car, more than it’s worth, all in the hopes that this is the car that’s going to be The One.
There is no One. There are several Ones. You’d be good in most of them; and eventually you’ll probably commit to others to drive around. So if you get an idea you like, just commit and know that no story idea, like no car, is going to be perfect 100% of the time. It’s just how it is. Don’t let your inner salesman fool you that you need to trade up and deserve something new. There is something very worthwhile in hanging out with a car that goes the distance.
On the other end of that analogy, once you’ve gotten to the end of life with your car, send it out to better pastures and get something else. (Meaning: stop revising your finished manuscript and never sending it out. That’s dumb too. Enough already: send it to the editors and find a new car.)
All right, questions: I’m not very writing focused (as you can tell) so I want to know about your cars. What do you drive and what do you think they say about you? Do you buy the same kind of car? Do you like having many options or just a few? And if your WIP was a car, what kind of car would it be? (You can sometimes pinpoint who your audience is if you can figure out what your car your story is.)
I went to the car lot with a friend who actually likes to buy cars, because you should bring positive people when you decide to do something expensive and that you may regret later (like tattoos or childbirth.) We picked out a couple cars that met my criteria; I drove them both; and I picked the one I liked. I said, “I think I will go with this car. I like it.” And she asked, “Do you want to go to another lot and drive more cars?”
In a word, no. I feel once I have found a car I like and think I can commit to for its life, that going around looking for more choices is a lot like dating a really nice guy who laughs at your jokes, remembers your birthday, and is great in bed, but you decide to keep playing the field in case your “soul mate” shows up. A car is a car is a car. And men are pretty much men, no matter how long you hold out looking for that soul mate. I’m not saying that I don’t think Deerhunter isn’t the bees knees or anything, but neither do I expect him to be that Disney version of a soul mate either. I’ve noticed that a lot of things a woman expects out a “soul mate” are usually better and more easily found in your girlfriend, so you’re better off delegating some of your emotional support to other people in your life. No one car can do everything either. If you fell in love with a sedan, don’t be pissed off its not a 4-wheel-drive pickup come winter. You knew that when you bought it. Maybe that’s just me and maybe I’m wrong and a bunch of you will correct me that there are men out there willing to do the girlfriend lunch and bitch about things and be everything. That’s fine.
I realize this has very little to do with writing, except for this: there is no perfect story or story idea. When you first get a story idea, you’re going to sit down with it, tool about town with the top down, and think, “This is the best idea ever!” You can’t imagine this story idea of a car will ever break down on the highway or start emitting a funny sound around the 50,000 mile mark that makes you wonder if it’s going to make it to the 100,000 mark, which you were promised. Which you need it to do because you need to turn this book in, completed! Trading in your story idea car for a new one before you get the last one paid off only kicks you in the ass in the long run. You know what happens if you keep trading up for the “better and newer” car right? You end up paying more money on the new car, more than it’s worth, all in the hopes that this is the car that’s going to be The One.
There is no One. There are several Ones. You’d be good in most of them; and eventually you’ll probably commit to others to drive around. So if you get an idea you like, just commit and know that no story idea, like no car, is going to be perfect 100% of the time. It’s just how it is. Don’t let your inner salesman fool you that you need to trade up and deserve something new. There is something very worthwhile in hanging out with a car that goes the distance.
On the other end of that analogy, once you’ve gotten to the end of life with your car, send it out to better pastures and get something else. (Meaning: stop revising your finished manuscript and never sending it out. That’s dumb too. Enough already: send it to the editors and find a new car.)
All right, questions: I’m not very writing focused (as you can tell) so I want to know about your cars. What do you drive and what do you think they say about you? Do you buy the same kind of car? Do you like having many options or just a few? And if your WIP was a car, what kind of car would it be? (You can sometimes pinpoint who your audience is if you can figure out what your car your story is.)
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91 comments:
Hellion, master of the metaphor.
I had Dodge this or that most all of my life. First car was a 1964 Dodge Dart station wagon, three on the tree, w/roofrack. Kept it well into the 200,000 mile mark. Gave it to my nephew. Bought a Dodge Omni...kept it until 120,000. Dodge Dakota, 110,000. Dodge Caravan, still own it. At about 120,000. But it's the secondary car.
Toyota Matrix is now primary car. Why did I leave the Dodge family? Transmissions. The Omni took two. The Dakota, two. The Caravan? Two. (Keep thinking the Caravan is going to demand a new one soon. Usually the need for this crucial organ transplant occurs around 40,000 miles.) (Every 40,000.) (Hence the trade in at the third anniversary of 40,000.)
What does this say about me? I'm loyal. To the point of not very brite. I like the Matrix, but it's not the most comfortable car around.
Sounds a bit like my assorted MS...
Newest MS would be...a dune buggy. Not terribly practical, but a lot of fun at the beach.
My first car was a Dodge Neon. Bonzai blue. :) I called her Blueberry. I loved that car. But she hit 100K miles and I turned her in for something new.
After Blueberry, I bought a VW Jetta. I loved that car too. I traded in a few years ago for my van, which I don't love. But the Jetta wouldn't accommodate a car seat in the back and my husband and I's 34 inseams.
I like smaller cars. When my boys are big enough that they don't require the giant car seats or huge strollers, I'm trading the beast in and buying another sedan.
I don't know what this MS is. Sleek on the outside, but a bit dangerous under the hood. BMW?
My first car was a Buick Skyhawk. I knew absolutely nothing about cars and took my father with, who I learned later knew even less! His big thing was "Buy American". I had to get rid of it when I moved out West. It had 32,000 miles on it and was breaking down quite a bit. Not too sorry to see it go.
My next car was a Honda Prelude, red with a black interior and a sunroof. The DH (then boyfriend) helped me pick out that car! I loved that car. It was very sporty and went well with the whole changing my life around thing. Bought it at 93,000 miles and it served me well for 4 years and well over 200,000 miles. I had to get rid of it when we had a baby, just like Marnee - carseats and all in and out of a 2 door was a pain.
Our next blip was a Honda Accord - lasted about a year or two and then we took the plunge and got a Plymouth Voyager minivan. I loved that van. Just traded it in last summer in the big "Cash for Clunkers" deal. It served us very well for over 11 years and I was sad to see it go. It was replaced by a Hyundai with good gas mileage.
I now drive the family Isuzu Rodeo SUV and I miss my van. I liked all the room. I can't fit as many in my SUV and that bugs me.
I have no idea what my ms would be - a big SUV comes to mind but I'm not sure why.
I adore this post! Wonderful analogy. I remember hating the two-seater cars and the backseat, and people climbing over, and the person in the front seat not wanting to get out first. LOL
I liked that you found a car that worked, and you went with it instead of continuing to look around. I don't really like SHOPPING. I like BUYING. Which is probably why I don't like DATING -- it's shopping, as you pointed out!
It does take commitment to stick with a manuscript during the hard times. And you're right about needing to know when it should be on its own.
What kind of car are my manuscripts. . .sporty convertibles. Something fast and fun. :)
Man, you sucked that metaphor for all it was worth. LOL! Great job!
And an apt analogy, as usual. (Alliteration anyone?)
I shop for cars online then go in knowing exactly what I want. THE vehicle I'm after. Which I guess means I plot it all out. I even usually get pre-financed so I don't have to haggle. Nothing worse than the salesman having to go back to the manager and back to me and back to the manager. Just let me talk to the freaking person in charge!
Maybe this is why I don't have a muse. Intense dislike for the middleman. Or woman, as the case may be.
Currently I drive a Pontiac G6 sedan, which I love. She's very sporty, dark and glittery, and for a 4 cyllander, she has great get up and go. I've owned a full size pick up in the past, V8 350 engine. *sigh* That maybe was awesome, but a gas guzzler. And that was when gas was well over $4 a gallon. Not. Good.
My WIP would be practical and sturdy, but no minivan. I'm just not a minivan girl. I'm thinking one of the smaller SUV's. Oh, a Jeep. Yeah, fun but practical with a tendency to slide up on two wheels if not kept under strict control.
Dodge Dakota 4x4, extra big cab with the Magnum V8 engine. Loaded, extra heavy dut towing package, black and silver paint job. I don’t drive the thing cuz it’s such A Guy’s vehicle. Which is another way of saying “I’m to short to see over the steering wheel”. Last year we were looking for a new car. I say “car”, my husband hears truck. The DH wanted an F150 quad cab blah-blah-blah.
What we ended up getting was …
Hyundai Elantra. We bought it because it had the smallest “footprint” in its class. IE it is green and gets great gas mileage. Plus it was very easy to drive and my DD was leaning how to drive. My daughter drives this car. Every now and then I‘ll say to my husband “Tell me again Why we’re driving the old cars and our DD gets the new one?” “Because it has eight airbags …” answers my DH. OhYes. Biggest reason we bought the car was because it is safe. Which is also thr reason why our daughter drives it.
I drive
Ford Taurus SEL. Big, fast car. Loaded, leather power seats, upgraded interior, paint even changes color depending upon the light. We bought it back in the day … when my DH wore suits, had an expense account, and he was required to have an American made sedan. The car actually has Ford , Volvo and Jaguar parts. My BIL told me that the front seats were the same ones that were used in the Jaguars. So I might look like I’m driving around in a Taurus … but my rear knows … it’s a Jag!
What does my car say about me? Well ... I might look like a Ford. But underneath I am something entirely different.
I think the pirates should hold a stump-the-Cap'n writing analogy contest. I never cease to be amazed at her ability to find writing connections everywhere. :)
My first car was a burgandy Corvair. I loved that little car, but alas like all Corvairs, she started slinging oil. My favorite car was a bright red Subaru that had 270,000 miles on it when I finally sold it because it wouldn't go into reverse. Now I'm driving a teal Toyota Rav-4. I loved the silver Sebring convertible I drove until a few months ago, but it was totally impractical.
I have no idea what vehicle TLWH is. I've been working on it so long that it's probably closest to a wood-paneled station wagon. I do know I'm constantly being distracted by flashier models that I catch a glimpse of as they zip past the edge of my imagination.
Julie -- LOL at your rear knowing it's a Jaguar.
Janga - TLWH is like a long, beautifully written country song. Of course it's an old pick up. Probably a 1970s model Chevy. :)
Julie - Nothing but the best for that ass, darlin'.
2nd: I am a Loyalist too. Deerhunter would have traded my Taurus off 2 years ago if he'd gotten the chance. "Why are you dumping money in this car?" "Because it runs; and I don't want a car payment." Besides I *LOVED* my blue car. To me, trading off a car because it was 'getting old' is the same sort of horrible mentality of trading an old dog away because it piddles on the floor and puppies are cuter. LOYALTY MATTERS.
Then again, after 6 transmissions, loyalty can be questioned. *LOL* Once upon a time, the Patriots were loyalists until they got shafted several times and decided to go their own route instead. It worked out in the end.
A dune buggy would be perfect for a day at the beach; and I'm sure your books would be great for a light read at the beach.
Marn, my friend Jackie had an adorable blue Dodge Neon. I forgot what she finally traded it off for: I think a Kia (but she didn't like the Kia nearly as much.)
I drove a Dodge Diplomat for a while when I was younger (before I bought my own car)--and it was a BEAST. Missing grill (not my fault), windows didn't roll up and down (not my fault), radio was shot (not my fault)--so I was rather glad to buy a car that had some niceties. *LOL* I don't prefer big honking vehicles--vans, suvs--but prefer a nice sedan to tool around in.
I can see your manuscript being an Audi--or whatever Jason Stratham drove in the Transporter movies. *LOL*
Irish, the Honda Prelude sounds like a corker!! Sweet! And you've been a Honda girl ever since--that's so sweet you've found a car family you like so much.
Irish, your manuscript would need to be an SUV because it's big enough to tote around your characters; it's an "American" concept car for your American novel (with American values); and it's a guy's vehicle but great for soccer moms.
Donna, sporty fast vehicles are FUN. And your "getting shot at a wedding" book definitely requires a fast getaway car!
(And I don't like shopping either. Especially for big items. Not DVDs or books--those I have no problem with--but with clothing, cars, appliances, anything over $50.)
The word "commitment" breaks me out in hives. I have no problem being loyal--but commitment is something else altogether.
Bo'sun, no surprise you plot your car out before you buy it. *LOL* And plot your books before you write it. It's worked for you, so why tinker with something that's not broke?
I loathe the middleman. I liked my salesman for about 30 minutes, and then I realized he basically didn't know one end of the car from the other. A guy that if my tire blew out and he was along, he'd call triple A rather than changing the tire. In other words, a completely USELESS man. I mean, *I* could have called for help, genius.
Bo'sun, your manuscript is a Ford Escape. :) Sporty SUV. Just make sure you get a 2010. The 2009's have bad transmissions... *LOL*
I really do think a convertible suits you, Hells. I can see you running around town in a red convertible. I've still yet to see your car. I will probably continue to look for your old one in the parking lot when we need to meet up. lol
Honestly, I'd like to say that an old muscle car is best suited for me. It's metal (which means less destructible from my end) and it's fast (which everyone knows I have a lead foot) and a gas guzzler because I don't care about being green or any of that other crap. But I drive a Camry. I mostly drive a Camry because my Camaro broke down every week and I was pissed off and broke down and bought a car I knew wouldn't break down. But it's a mom car. I love that it doesn't break down, hate that I feel like that white picket, 2.5 kids and 2 pets, Stepford wife stereotypical woman who drives a Camry.
I've had all kinds of vehicles. I've had four doors and SUV's and sports cars. If I knew I wouldn't get 3 speeding tickets in a day, I would buy a new Camaro or Mustang. But I know myself better than that and will have to buy something that will NOT get me into trouble.
Jules, you're a woman after my own heart: a Taurus. My Taurus could book! My brother in law calls me the Blue Streak (or did) because you didn't really see my car. You saw a blue streak as I romped up the gravel road at 50 miles an hour. (Which isn't smart to do on a gravel road, but my Taurus was wonderful.)
I love that your Taurus has other parts...so on the outside looks like something sweet and mild, and beneath roars the passion of a hellcat!
No Fords! Goodness, my father would never speak to me again. Every car I've ever owned (and there have been a TON of them) has been a GM with the minor forays into the Chrysler family.
Jeep is in the Chrysler family, so I'm safe. LOL!
I'm definitely a sports car kind of gal -- or I was, until I finally totaled my beloved Nissan 240SX. (Sniff. May she rest in peace.)
A few years ago I bought a practical Toyota Corolla. Who knew it would become dangerous? LOL
Which reminds me -- the other day this dude on a motorcycle didn't like that I was in front of him, so he zoomed in front of me, and then deliberately slowed down. I wanted to yell at him, "Seriously?! How do you know for sure my car won't ACCELERATE with no warning?" LOL
Janga, I can totally picture you in a red Subaru--I thought about a Subaru because of their reputation as reliable and hardy. :) Unfortunately I'd probably have to buy new because Subaru owners tend to sell their cars when they've put about 200,000 miles on them. *LOL* Someday, though...someday....
I think your manuscript is a little more ritzy than a wood-paneled stationwagon. *LOL* At least maybe a beaten up Ford pick up truck or something...that's a country music standard, right?
I think I would be tempted to have an "acceleration" issue just because he zoomed in front of me and slowed down. I hate that.
Laughing my ass off at this post!
Literally 2 weeks ago my little used Ford Escourt died on me and I had to buy a new car in about 1/2 day. Bought a Hyundai Elantra - wanted four doors - cheaper, but wanted something that I didn't feel like a college student driving. I'm loving it so far.
Before the escourt (which lasted only 6 months - I bought it used and cheap while I decided what I wanted to buy) I drove many many cars since we did 2 year leases for a long time.
Last lease was a Jeep - felt like Linda Hamilton in Terminator and all my story ideas were kick-butt Urban Fantasies.
Before that it was a BMW Z4 Convertible- all my ideas were of James Bond heros and romantic suspenses with fast car chases.
I've always thought I could write a great post on how my car inspires my story ideas! LOL - it's becuase I have a long commute and this is when I do my best brainstorming!
I see Bo'sun has beaten me to the pickup analogy--and is having a Brand war about it. Nice.
Janga, I think you should not pick a side but choose an old Studebaker pickup instead. That is if you can find parts for it. *LOL*
I must say, out of everyone, Scapegoat has the best handle name. Why didn't I think of that.
I think I would be tempted to have an “acceleration” issue just because he zoomed in front of me and slowed down. I hate that.
I have to admit, I was trying to figure out if my insurance company would believe me. LOL Fortunately for him, I got distracted by a Starbucks and went a different direction. LOL
Sin - you can thank 2nd Chance for the handle. She lovingly dubbed me Scapegoat awhile back :) She likes to blame me for the conversation taking off in a tangent :)
P.S. Sin, I don't look at your car and think white picket fence. I look at your car and think, "Get the hell out of her way."
Sin, I do not have a convertible. I don't even have a sun roof (though I did look at a Nissan something that had one, but it was $25K USED, so that was a no-go.)
I just have a little red (berry red) sedan. Looks slightly smaller than the Taurus; and doesn't have the curves like the Taurus did. (I loved the curves of my Taurus.) My Kia has its own prettiness, but it's not in the form of curves.
But I could totally see myself in a convertible too. I love my hair blowing around like that. *LOL*
Sorry, spent my entire childhood watching my dad and his brothers and buddies fight the brand war. It's totally ingrained in me.
Donna is KILLING me. Dangerous without even trying. LOL! And Scapegoat with the car inspiring the stories. This totally explains why my stories carry the same practical note throughout. I've never owned a sports car of convertible. But now I want to.
I wanted to yell at him, “Seriously?! How do you know for sure my car won’t ACCELERATE with no warning?”
*ROTFLMAO*
I had a sunroof once. It was in a Dodge Duster Hatchback (yes, the Chrysler version of the Escort) and I was forever forgetting to close the thing. That car had standing water in it all the time.
But that car lasted forever. I'd bought it wrecked, my dad fixed it up, drove it forever, then gave it to my dad. He drove it for years before some lady in a minivan took it out. We were all sorry to see that warrior have to go.
*LOL* Scapegoat, see, at least you knew the Escort was temporary. *LOL* (So few Escort buyers ever realized that, I think. My sister bought several Escorts..."They'll last." How? You drive like an idiot and your children are hellions. This car will be lucky if it arrives at the dealership with 90% of its original inside paneling.)
I totally agree: I think the type of car you drive could inspire all sorts of story ideas. *LOL* I totally think if my friend who buys new, trendy, and hip were writing books, she'd totally write cougar themed books out the wazoo.
I do not look at my car and think get the hell out of my way. Now, me sitting in the car with road rage and flipping you off, yeah, that probably screams get the hell out of my way.
I know you don't have a convertible, but I'm still of the mind that you SHOULD have one.
And I take one look at the Camry and think to myself "Really?! You must have really been pissed when we bought this car."
I did manage to get a V6 and moon roof so at least I wasn't that pissed. I had T-tops in the Camaro. They leaked but I loved that car.
I had a friend with a Nova like that. I swear, her parents told her if she could destroy the car they'd buy her a new one. We tried everything. Actively tried to destroy that car. I had all sorts of ideas to kill it. Nothing worked. It was indestructible. All 16 year olds should have a Nova.
LOL, Sin, about the Nova that won't be destroyed. Sounds like a Stephen King novel.
And Scapegoat -- LOVE your name, although I don't think I'd want the responsibility that goes along with it. LOL I do like how your cars inspired your stories. Mmmm. Wonder what kind of car I need NEXT? I'm thinking Ferrari.
Oh, my dad had TWO Novas when I was a kid and you cannot kill those cars. They are like freaking TANKS. LOL! The gray hatchback's windshield was held in with Duct tape. Never leaked a drop. The other one was a sporty, banana yellow wagon. I realize "sporty" and "wagon" don't go together, but they melded like a dream in this car. Standard with a fancy gear shift. Even at like 11 yrs old, I knew that car was hot. LOL!
I'm late today (and haven't read the other comments - BAD coxswain!), but I adore this post and metaphor! It reminds me of a conversation I was having with a friend a while back. We were talking to this sweet 24-year-old who had met "the guy." And were talking about how young girls (i.e. early twenties) are all worried about settling and soul mates and finding "the one". Women in their mid-thirties and above are much more pragmatic about the whole thing. If he's decent in bed and nice to his mother, marry him. Flat out.
So, to continue this metaphor, maybe as we become more mature writers, we start to lose the "this is the best book idea EVER" feeling (which I have said about the last two book ideas *g*). We get a better sense of what we want (decent in bed, because really, that has to be the #1 priority, right), and what doesn't matter in the long run (it doesn't have to be "the best ever").
Anybody seen "Up in the Air"? I still can't decide how I felt about the movie, but there was a great line about how by the time a woman turns forty, she's just praying he's not shorter than her. Anything else can be compromised on *g*
I've decided my next car is going to be a "Novella". LOL Now somebody just needs to invent it. :)
Hal, you're so right about 20-somethings (which I was once!) thinking you've got to find "the one". As if you can't get anything else done until that happens somehow. Mmmm.
I think now I'm more interested in "play dates". LOL Everyone goes back to their own house when the fun and games are done!
I want to see Up in the Air. I will have to rent it.
I don't know about anyone else but I've always worried about the shorter issue. This might be because I am an Amazon. But I'm not sure which one is my greater priority. Fantastical in bed or as taller or taller than me. Both are difficult to find, that's for sure and it's like finding the one winged unicorn of the lot if you get both.
Donna, you're cracking me up! I love it. "Play dates." Best idea ever.
Funny enough, I settled for the first car to come along in my early 20s. Chucked that one to the curb when I hit 30, been doing the playdates Donna mentions ever since. Me, gunshy? Nah, why do you ask?
Hal - I've yet to see that movie and thanks for the reminder, I'm headed to Netflix now. But I have to concede there might be a thread of truth to that line. Then again, compromise can be good. Right? Maybe?
Sin, I'm with you -- I'm tall and wondering what happened to all the tall men. I'm tired of dealing with the issue.
So when they come over for a play date, I'm gonna have on of those D*sneyland signs: "Must be THIS tall to go on this ride." LOL
"Must be THIS tall to go on this ride.”
ROFL!!
Novas are hard to kill. I think it was my sister or brother who finally killed it--and they are like the antichrist when it comes to cars.
Dad had a 70-something Nova, and he tried to teach me to drive standard on it. I threw it in the ditch, accidentally shifting from 1st to reverse or some such, and that was the end of that driving lesson. Though I have to say my Dad didn't bat an eyelash when we went flying into the ditch. He was willing to make me drive it back out of there, but I refused. *LOL*
Hmmm...at this point I'd say if my WIP was a car it would be a beaten up pinto wagon. Hot!lol.
Hal: exactly, is he great in bed? Awesome. Everything else can usually be compromised on. *LOL* Soul mates? I don't care if you can read my mind; I don't want you to read my mind...I want you to that swirly thing with your tongue...
Yes, I find myself getting more and more pragmatic. My student worker is in her 20s and fits the mode you described and thinks there are men who don't think about sex ALL the time and I just think, "You wait. You'll see I'm right; and to a degree, you're going to appreciate they think about it all the time."
I don’t know about anyone else but I’ve always worried about the shorter issue.
Oh I agree ... no shorties for me either! Oh wait ... are you talking about the size of their --- or their highth?
Both are difficult to find, that’s for sure and it’s like finding the one winged unicorn of the lot if you get both.
No kidding there!
So when they come over for a play date, I’m gonna have on of those D*sneyland signs: “Must be THIS tall to go on this ride.”
OMG, I want this for my bedroom.
I mean, I used to have a sign above my bed that said "Actress" but I have not put it up in the bedroom. This one would be MUCH funnier.
Make that 'Height'. sorry. But I just cannot not tease a tall man.
Kelly, if your current WIP is a Pinto, get that baby written before it explodes entirely!!!
Good advice, Helli.lol. I'm hoping to polish it up to a Vista Cruiser by week's end.lol.
And yes ... I owned one.
What kind of car do I write? A Mazda 323 GT. Faster than the pocket rockets or the Ford Mustang 5 liter GT. What made this car unique is that it looked like an ordinary four door sedan. But it had the Miata engine with a turbo added on. Fast off the line. Fast acceleration. The car came standard with high performance racing breaks and adjustable racing suspension. It was a unique car, but one that didn’t fit into any category. Mazda only made 272 0f them in the late 1980’s . A manufacture has to produce 273 cars for a model to be consider a stock car. So the Mazda 323 GT could not be raced in stock car racing events. What was people’s reaction to this car? The same as people’s reaction to my writing.
“What the Hell wassss that?”
Eric Foreman made good use of the Vista Cruiser. May the force be with you, Kelly.
NICE, Jules. *LOL* "What the Hell wasss that?"--sounds like Sin commenting on my writing.
And Jules, you must tell me. Did you get into trouble with that car? And if you didn't, what the hell is wrong with you?
LMAO. I never say that. I spend my entire time either laughing hysterically or wanting to kill Matt.
They'd have to catch her first. You can't be in trouble if you don't get caught.
I think Matt does that so you don't forget about him. That's his big fear you know. You'll meet Ranger out in public and run off with him. Matt would get a postcard in the mail. "You can file for abandonment."
Scapegoat is my hero, actually. I once blamed her for everything... If if connect with Heather Osborn from Tor while I'm here...Scapegoat wins a book dedication, as she instigated a 'buy Heather a drink' convo on my behalf.
I love Scapegoat.
Yeah, Kraken's Mirror is a dune buggy. The Changed World? A post apocalypse Range Rover? The entire Caribbean Series? ATVs, three wheeled. All my alien stories? Hovercraft.
Been offered an introduction to Angela James and the chance to pitch The Kraken's Mirror. I'll owe Judi McCoy a dedication.
I better get published one of the these days! So many dedication promises to keep...
Janga! I second the stump Hellion metaphor contest!
And Hellion? Heard of an author writing Amish Romance... Just for you... Amy Clipston.
Dang, Julie -- I so want that car! If you still owned it, I'd be yelling, "Shotgun!"
And Jules, you must tell me. Did you get into trouble with that car? And if you didn’t, what the hell is wrong with you?
Like I said SIN faster than the pocket rockets or the Ford Mustang 5 liter GT. Fast off the line. Fast acceleration. We umm ... tested it. And Hellion is right ... they gotta catch you!
Amy Clipston. I'll have to look her up. (I'd invite her to blog, but I think she might be scarred by a bunch of pirates...and so would her audience. *LOL*)
How exactly would you stump the Hellion with metaphor? (Though Deerhunter stumped me once with a metaphor. He was talking about CHOCOLATE CAKE. A nice dark wedge of chocolate cake--and all I got from the story was "Damn, I'd like chocolate cake." This is back when Weight Watchers worked for me and I was skinny and hungry. He finally stopped and said, "You're not getting this are you?" Nope, sometimes chocolate cake is chocolate cake. And if I was looking for the chocolate sex of cake, I wouldn't do it with a wedge of chocolate cake...that's not how I roll. A longjohn of cream filled delight maybe. With a caramel frosting. I get all whorish for caramel.)
How about we have a "Out Metaphor the Hellion" or something?
OK, let's see you make a writing metaphor out of... Star Trek. Original series, with Shatner... ;)
Yes, Amy originally wrote a NASCAR romance and has now written three Amish Romances... Have fun!
*googles Amy Clipston* Ooh, those books do sound good! I'll have to read them! Thanks, 2nd! And thank Amy if you see her!
Now I want some chocolate cake.
And until last week I didn't know a longjohn was something besides underwear. :) At least I hope that's what you're talking about here!
Longjohn or I don't know. Those rectangular donuts with the cream in the middle. I could swear they call them longjohns, but I've yet to figure out why.
Oh, I get it now. You GUYS give me the crap to make a metaphor from and I try to make a writing metaphor from it, huh? I get to do the work. Nice. Very nice.
And I'd do better with a NASCAR metaphor than I would with Star Trek, but I'll do some research and try to give it a whirl. (Won't watch it, of course, because I can't stand it, but whatever.)
While you were metaphoring, I had to google "Long John donut". There's a maple and bacon one listed at a place called Voodoo Donuts. LOL I still don't know why it's called Long John, OR why I haven't heard it until just lately!
I thought those were called Lady Fingers? And I've heard of that Voodoo Donuts place. They have crazy stuff on their menu.
She went straight for the tough one with Star Trek there, but I have faith you can do it, Hellie.
Oh, I have one next. Wall Street. Take it away.
Googled and Lady Fingers aren't even close. Sheesh. I think you might know the Long Johns as Eclairs, Donna. Those ones covered in chocolate with cream filling look awesome.
Is this what you mean, Hellie?
http://img.timeinc.net/recipes/i/recipes/ck/04/05/phyllo-eclairs-ck-630166-l.jpg
Okay, now I have to stop googling images of donuts while at work. Worst idea ever. But damn it I want one.
I think you're right -- eclairs vs. Long Johns.
And you're doubly right about wanting a donut. The orange I just ate isn't even close. Wish I could just WRITE one into existence! LOL
long john is a very midwest term :) Basically it's just an over-sized doughnut stuffed full of yummy filler and iced!
So I just got back and read the comments -- I wasn't *recommending* Up in the Air. I like I said, I don't know how I feel about it. It's definitely wroth seeing, I just needed to make sure that disclaimer was there, in case you get to the end and try to hunt me down!
This is a Long John.
http://www.auntbubbiesfakefood.com/images/graphics/longjohndonutwithchocolatefrosting.jpg
Wall Street? *cat gakking sound* Ugh!
Okay, start listing them people. Things you want me to write analogies about. Apparently you can't be too mean because out the gate, 2nd and Bo'sun didn't mess around finding the crappiest things for me to write about.
I'm not doing them in order. *LOL* Some of these will require more thought than others.
There's really a lot of different lingo when it comes to donuts, which I realized when I moved to the East Coast -- I could never keep straight what a "chocolate covered" was, or a "honey dipped".
So I just quit eating donuts. LOL
Donna said it here first! Donna is a quitter!
Dude, I wouldn't QUIT eating donuts just because I couldn't keep the names straight anymore than I'd quit having sex because I couldn't keep the names straight. "Who are you again? Never mind. Just...yeah, that, right there."
Okay, I found some peanut butter eggs that I'd forgotten about. That will have to do.
Donna - I'm okay until they add sprinkles. I hate sprinkles.
That's another thing, Bo'sun -- they don't call them sprinkles here. They call them jimmies! Why? I don't know!
LOL Hellion -- you could be right about names being overrated. Hey, I know -- I'll just call all the playdates "Jimmies". LOL
As long as you don't call them Johns...
I grew up in Ohio but haven't lived up north since 1993. I've set my WIP in Ohio. Which means I have to keep calling it pop instead of soda and it's totally messing with me. LOL! Even though my family still refers to it that way (they're still there) it sounds weird to my ears.
I've heard sprinkles called jimmies and it makes as much sense as the "long johns". Who are these guys?
I'm not a fan of sprinkles on my donut. Some caramel frosting...that's all.
I don't like cake donuts. I prefer the yeast ones. I throw cake ones into the street to fill potholes, which is all they are good for in my mind.
You could be located here, specifically, where we call it "sodie pop", which apparently is the only place on the planet that calls it that.
Took me forever to adjust to Arkansas where everything is a coke.
You want a coke?
Sure. What kind do you have?
Sprite, Mountain Dew, Root Beer...
This baffled me.
And the most important of all -- Dr. Pepper. LOL
I drive a Tonka truck. Seriously.
You can pack a lot of baggage in a Tonka Truck. :)
Mine has a crew cab. Wanna see?
http://www.aliceaudrey.com/?p=2955
OMG! That's HILARIOUS! Do you like it?
Yes, for the most part. Unluckily, it was made in China. The shocks are unimpressive and it's more delicate than I like, but it gets mpg in the 30s and is supposed to get in the 55s when I have an adjustment made to the engine. It holds the whole family plus cargo. We do get stared at a lot. One old guy almost walked off the sidewalk a couple of days ago.
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