Wednesday, April 21, 2010
The perfect woman
I read a book last week, it had a great, hopping plot, hot sex, and a villain creepy enough to keep me up at night. But there was something the heroine who set my teeth on edge.
It took me a while to figure out what it was. I mean, she seemed like a great girl. She was a hostage negotiator, which is a pretty kicking job for a chick. She was quick with a gun and a friendly gesture. She was raising her 7-year-old daughter and taking care of her invalid mother.
She was never rude, never mean, she didn't screw up or get frustrated and snap. So what was it about her that bothered me so much?
That's when it hit me. She was freakin perfect. You know how, after a huge fight, you think of the perfect thing to say? She said it duringthe fight. She was reasonable, in all situations. Crazy guy takes his whole family hostage, she calmly talked him down. Mom had a panic attack, she comforted her. Daughter had a problem, she was super mom.
******************
She reacted perfectly, in each and every situation she was put in. Said the perfectly reasonable thing. Comforted the right people. Talked people out of their anger. She never messed up.
I hated her.
It brought to mind two things that we, as the creator of heroine's who are not perfect:
1. Everybody, including the heroine, snaps. When we're tired, stressed, overwhelmed, or scared, we take it out on the people close to us. It's human nature. It's also while most of us just tie up the man in the basement, so there's no danger of him getting tired of bitchy moods and bolting. The question isn't if you're heroine can do the right thing every time, it's if she can make up for her mistakes. Let her snap and mouth off her to her mother. Let her see her daughter's eyes fill with hurt feelings. And then let her fix it. We can all identify with that.
2. Everybody, even the good guys, screw up. This may only be true for suspense, but I'm curious if anyone feels it bleeds over into other sub-genres. In this particular suspense plot, the heroine never messed up. No matter what the bad guys threw at her, she handled it perfectly. Problem is, that meant she could only react. She waited to see what the bad guys did next, then responded perfectly. Bad guys moved on to phase 2, heroine responded perfectly. At some point, the police making a mistake, such as following a false lead or missing a subtle clue, would have totally spiced up the plot.
What kind of mistakes has your heroine made? Any witty dialog you care to share, where your heroine snaps and tells someone off? Come on, pirates, I know we've got some heroines with super creative insults - let's share! How do you feel about characters making mistakes? What's more important to you -- making the right choice the first time or making up for the mistake later?
It took me a while to figure out what it was. I mean, she seemed like a great girl. She was a hostage negotiator, which is a pretty kicking job for a chick. She was quick with a gun and a friendly gesture. She was raising her 7-year-old daughter and taking care of her invalid mother.
She was never rude, never mean, she didn't screw up or get frustrated and snap. So what was it about her that bothered me so much?
That's when it hit me. She was freakin perfect. You know how, after a huge fight, you think of the perfect thing to say? She said it duringthe fight. She was reasonable, in all situations. Crazy guy takes his whole family hostage, she calmly talked him down. Mom had a panic attack, she comforted her. Daughter had a problem, she was super mom.
******************
She reacted perfectly, in each and every situation she was put in. Said the perfectly reasonable thing. Comforted the right people. Talked people out of their anger. She never messed up.
I hated her.
It brought to mind two things that we, as the creator of heroine's who are not perfect:
1. Everybody, including the heroine, snaps. When we're tired, stressed, overwhelmed, or scared, we take it out on the people close to us. It's human nature. It's also while most of us just tie up the man in the basement, so there's no danger of him getting tired of bitchy moods and bolting. The question isn't if you're heroine can do the right thing every time, it's if she can make up for her mistakes. Let her snap and mouth off her to her mother. Let her see her daughter's eyes fill with hurt feelings. And then let her fix it. We can all identify with that.
2. Everybody, even the good guys, screw up. This may only be true for suspense, but I'm curious if anyone feels it bleeds over into other sub-genres. In this particular suspense plot, the heroine never messed up. No matter what the bad guys threw at her, she handled it perfectly. Problem is, that meant she could only react. She waited to see what the bad guys did next, then responded perfectly. Bad guys moved on to phase 2, heroine responded perfectly. At some point, the police making a mistake, such as following a false lead or missing a subtle clue, would have totally spiced up the plot.
What kind of mistakes has your heroine made? Any witty dialog you care to share, where your heroine snaps and tells someone off? Come on, pirates, I know we've got some heroines with super creative insults - let's share! How do you feel about characters making mistakes? What's more important to you -- making the right choice the first time or making up for the mistake later?
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54 comments:
Oh my God. I HATE those heroines. You want to reach into the book and check for a pulse--except that you already know their heart is "madly racing with passion" or some crap like that.
In my WIP the heroine has already almost gotten herself killed by page 10 and she's already weeping uncontrollably on page 40.
While I appreciate that our characters need to have flaws, this might just be the kiss of death...
What kind of mistakes doesn't my heroine make? LOL! In her defense, she thinks she's doing the right things when she tells off my hero. She thinks pushing him away is the right thing.
I think you're right, that fixing the mistake is more important than the first choice. Though the first choice definitely gives an indication of what's on the character's mind, what their first instincts are.
Lemme think of a good snap and tell someone off scene.... Would it be ok if the telling off isn't a mistake and the person deserves it?
LOL!
You want to reach into the book and check for a pulse–except that you already know their heart is “madly racing with passion” or some crap like that.
Yup, I've got a whole series based on people's mistakes. BIG mistakes. I'm all about them. My writer tagline is something like "characters that make mistakes but don't let the mistakes make them." Nobody sits around stewing too long---they try to make the best of things. I want to read about flawed characters and how they tape themselves back together.Since I'm so far from perfect, I can't imagine writing perefect people.;)
I'm not sure this is a telling off, but this is definitely one of the times my heroine does something to push the hero away. Though I think this is also her trying to make up for something too....
*****
But before she’d had her fill, he pulled away. When he stood, his entire body was tense. And again she stopped him from leaving. She didn’t want him to go like this, angry at her. How could she explain this to him? For a decade, she hadn’t been able to rely on anyone, least of all the men who traipsed through her life. As much as she wanted to lean on him, wanted to give in to the temptation of him—his steadiness, his body—she couldn’t allow herself to do so. She’d been disappointed too many times before.
But she couldn’t explain that. Because it didn’t matter. How he saw her didn’t matter at all.
So, instead, she offered him what she could, the only thing she had to give him. “Two days hence, a ship will arrive in the harbor from France. I’m not sure what the boat carries but he was concerned that some of the men you were looking for would give away its existence. He said there would be hell to pay if any of them revealed what they knew.”
He scowled. “You weren’t going to tell me this, were you?”
“No,” she admitted. “I wasn’t.”
He blinked. Shocked, maybe. And, if she was willing to admit it to herself, maybe hurt as well. “You don’t trust me at all, do you?”
She didn’t answer, afraid of what would tumble out if she opened her mouth.
"I see.” This time he did get up and she let him. He walked to the door and collected the hat he’d left there. “Thank you, Miss Jordan, for this information.” His tone was formal and there was no expression on his face. “In the meantime, I will have someone look after you and your home. Never go anywhere without Jack and have him send me a message if Stafford gets near you.” His hand rested on the doorknob. “Carry your pistol. Do not hesitate to use it. I will vouch for you, whatever the consequences.”
He bowed a formal and elegant bow, again the aloof aristocrat. “Good night, Miss Jordan.”
“Good night, James,” she responded softly.
He stepped out, closing the door quietly behind him.
Sheesh. I CAN'T stand Stepford Characters. This is what happens when I reply using my iPod. Sighhhhhh.
I know what book this is, but I didn't have a problem
with the heroine. I thought it was an interesting contrast of the chaos of the heroine's life and that author is pretty much known for writing the capable heroine imo.
But, as a whole, I can stand Stepford Characters. I like seeing how people change and the whole arc of their character. Flat characters just don't do it for me.
I have read stories with those kinds of heroines. I think they're called Mary Sue characters.
It doesn't take too many pages before one puts the book down...forever.
Maggie - that's a GREAT tagline! I love it! You're so right - it's much more interesting to see how people move on, and "tape themselves back together" than to see them do the right thing the first time around!
Marn - excellent scene! I love it. I remember that from a few chapters back and loved it then. And it's heartbreaking because she knows she should trust him, but she just can't bring herself to. I love it.
I started a comment earlier then hit a wrong button and reset my comp. LOL! Dang it.
Welcome to The Revenge, Marisa!
Nice excerpt, Marn. Love a little taste of angst in the morning.
Hal - I got a little worried when I started reading this because my blog tomorrow is also about heroines. But I took a different angle. I think the title will get lots of attention. ;)
I'm not a fan of perfect heroines, but I haven't found one in a long time either. If the character is going to feel real, as if she stepped off the page, then she has to be human and that means have flaws and preconceived notions and something that sets her off. A character without dimension is as Ely says, a flat character.
I guess this is where it's good my heroine seems to be me. That gives her flaws galore! She keeps getting mad and taking it out on the hero, who on the surface is partly to blame for her problem. But really, he's more an innocent bystander. And during the story, she realizes she's being irrational or standoffish or stubborn, and tries to change. Isn't that the point? To start them as one person and have them grow into a better, still human, version?
I'll hunt up a fun excerpt. I know just the scene I need.
Elyssa, that's interesting that you had a different reaction. And you're absolutely right that it was a great contrast, because there was so much chaos in her life, it would have been hard to add any more internal chaos.
You bring up a great point about character changing. That characters shouldn't be making the same mistakes at the end of a book that they're making at the beginning.
Hi Marisa! Ahh, the dreaded Mary Sue character! I started out writing fanfiction, where Mary Sue abounds. I don't see her so much in published fiction, but you may be right!
Okay, the issue in my book is the school needs new books. Emma (heroine) is a teacher fighting for them. Nate (hero) just took the job as baseball coach. Emma has just learned that her books were turned down (AGAIN!) but Nate got all new baseball equipment including new uniforms.
Flying through the door that led to the teacher parking lot, Emma ran directly into the source of her fury.
“Whoa,” Nate said, grabbing her by the arms, saving her from falling. “Where’s the fire?”
“Your office if I had my way.”
Recognizing an angry woman when he saw one, Nate dropped his hands and stepped back. “Excuse me? I don’t even have an office.”
“You don’t have an office?” Some of the fluff seemed to fall out of her storm cloud.
“No. What’s got you all riled up? Did I park in the wrong spot or something?” Looking over his shoulder, he checked the space where he’d parked his truck.
“Do you know how old the books are these students are forced to use?”
He’d forgotten how fighting with a woman could be like dodging sniper fire. Focused on getting away with his skin intact, he answered truthfully. “No idea.”
“Do you even care?” An odd shade of red colored her cheeks and he wondered if this kind of anger was healthy.
This question seemed more dangerous than the first. She seemed to care a great deal so he went that route. “Sure I do.” Unfortunately, it came out sounding more like a question than an answer.
“You think you’re so special.” That was definitely not a question. “Mr. Major-Leagues, model-dating, money-stealing Baseball.”
“I haven’t stolen anything and she was technically a former model.” What did his dating stats have to do with this? “Since I just got here and I’m pretty sure we were fine when I left your place last night, could you tell me what I’ve done?”
“You know what you’ve done.”
Why did every woman do that? Didn’t they realize if men knew, then we’d fix it? “I’m afraid I don’t.”
Emma moved around him, throwing up rocks as if she were peeling out. “You won’t win, Nate Campbell.”
Great, she finally told him something he did know, only it was no help at all.
Ter, ohh, an irrational standoffish and stubborn heroine! I love it! (and I can't wait to see what tomorrow's title is *g*). I think you're absolutely right, and it kind of goes along with what Ely said. A character should grow and change during the story, they should become someone capable of giving and receiving love, they should learn something about themselves.
So if you're character is perfect to start with, you've got nowhere to go. I think SEP is a great example of having those smart-mouthed, short-fused heroines who mature over the course of the story. Blue from Natural Born Charmer always stands out to me.
Another excerpt! Yay!
Ter! I LOVE this! I love the dodging sniper fire line and the part about "dating stat". Only a baseball player would have "stats" for dating!!
I like Emma's fire, her wrath. Now that is a fun heroine!
Hmmm.
I do like to give my hero and heroine the right thing to say most of the time. Occasionally one of them will say something, and the other one WON'T know what to say back...and I tend to leave it. Or I try to. But yes, my characters are wittier than the average couple. My only concession is that I make my hero just as witty as the woman; I don't let her get all the zingers. (This is an improvement for me, so I have to brag about it.)
I like it when the character finally collapses and has a meltdown. Think of When Harry Met Sally--Sally ALWAYS said and did the right thing. They had little arguments, but it was usually Harry freaking out or saying something obnoxious--and then that scene at the wedding when she flat out loses it and says, "Is one of us supposed to be a dog in this scenerio?" "Yes, you, you're the dog." And she bitch slaps him in the middle of that wedding. I mean, weren't we all rooting for Sally there?
Okay, Sally had other issues as well. But she was great...there were parts you could totally relate to and other parts where you went, "If this neurotic control freak could find true love, so can I!" No one wants to read a book that suggests you have to be perfect all the time in order to be deserving of love. Where's the fun in that?
Sally! Sally is a great example of a flawed heroine. And one who we all adore. I love that melt-down scene.
Nice job balancing out the zinger between Adam and Eve :) It's nice that he can get in a few here and there. And it's wonderful to have some little neurosis that readers can identify with. It makes them human *g*
I think I recognize the book too, and if I'm right, my reaction was the same as Ely's. I saw the heroine as a woman focused on doing the right thing when circumstances allowed her to exercise control in contrast to all the things over which she had no control. But I agree that the truly perfect heroine is boring. I had a creative writing prof once tell me that good characters are boring. I disagree with that conclusion. I think saintliness can be interesting if the reader sees the scars and the struggles underneath the saintliness.
I hit "submit' too soon again. I meant to add that I loved both Marn's and Terri's excerpts. Both reveal character so well.
And, Ter, yours is pitch perfect in terms of male-female miscommunication. lol
I'll see what I can find and post an excerpt later.
I'm so glad you all like it. I struggle with deep POV and tried really hard to make it work in that exchange.
Don't let Hellie fool you, she's the queen of making the reader fall over from leaning in waiting for the characters to say what you are yelling at them to say, and then they don't. Which just makes you have to turn the page to see when they'll finally make the move you're dying for them to make. LOL!
Janga - This is why I worry about my stories. My people aren't over-the-top at all and it's hard to compare them next to movie stars and corporate mogals and weathly, long-standing lineages and believe anyone would want to read about them.
Can't wait to read your excerpt.
Wow -- I picked the wrong morning to sleep in. I feel so far behind now!
I'm gonna read everything and come right back!
Okay, so maybe I was the only one with this reaction to this character! LOL!
I have to agree with you, Janga, that good characters are not the boring, nice ones. You say, I think saintliness can be interesting if the reader sees the scars and the struggles underneath the saintliness.
I so agree! And so often in those situations, the character is learning the opposite, that it's okay to make mistakes and relax and not take everything so seriously. Excellent point!
Ter - I don't think ordinary characters are any less exciting than the movie star or mega-wealthy character. I think when the reader identifies with a character, it creates that desire to read about them, to care what happens to them, and want to keep reading. In that regard, writing the ordinary character is a better starting platform, because it's easier to identify with someone like us.
I know for me personally, I don't give a crap about corporate moguls with wealthy, long-standing lineages! LOL!
I can agree with Janga that saintliness can be shown as a "flaw" to a degree. Tessa Dare's 3rd in her trilogy (the name is escaping me) but it's basically the sinner and the saint set up.
But I think the key is SHOWING the vulnerability of the saintly behavior.
I think Hal is saying it's annoying to read about the perfect woman all the time if there is no hint of vulnerability about her.
I know for me personally, I don’t give a crap about corporate moguls with wealthy, long-standing lineages!
AMEN, SISTER!
Hal, I thought this was a great blog. I haven't read this particular book, but I can see where a too-perfect heroine would be annoying. Kind of like people hating M*rth* St*wart for being too perfect, and in the process, making us feel deficient. LOL It's hard to root for somebody that wouldn't even hang out with you!
Also, as I recently learned in some revisions, if the characters aren't quirky or flawed, you reduce a lot of conflict, or conflict potential, between characters. And that can get boring fast.
Marn -- I loved the excerpt. I kept waiting for one of them to give in. Aaugh! They didn't!
Bo'sun -- I just fell in love with Nate. Too funny how he recognizes the dangers but can't seem to dodge them safely.
No excerpt from me. I have a heroine whose heart races with passion! LOL
LOL! Donna, you crack me up. I bet that passion is spent in anger a time or two. Give us a looksee!
Tessa's 3rd book is A Lady of Persuasion and I actually didn't like the heroine as much as I LOVE the hero. He being the sinner, of course. LOL! But that is one awesome book.
I like the characters who appear to be perfect or have it all together and we eventually see it hasn't always been that way. When the depth is revealed, it makes that character so much more than we first believed.
I loved the heroine in A Lady of Persuasion. *LOL* But I loved the hero too--hilarious in the lengths he'd go to accommodate her.
And those types of reveals are very cool. Earth-shattering, perhaps.
Yeah, those perfect heroines are a bit annoying, aren't they?
The heroine of my current manuscript is anything but perfect. She tries but she hides behind her imperfections. One of my favorite things she does is misquotes scriptures (she was rescued and raised by a Reverend). And she curses a bit more than a 'proper lady' should. She hangs out at the saloons and gambles, robs trains, shoots the hero (but can't shoot a horse with a broken leg). She's far from perfection. But she does all these other things that shows how pure and honest her heart is.
Oh, Renee hit it on the nose for me. Intentions, intentions, intentions. If the hero/ine does the worst thing they could do, but I know there were good intentions behind it, that deep down they really are a good person, then I'm much more able to forgive and understand down the road.
After all, so much of writing romance is about redeeming characters. They have to do something that requires redeeming, but they have to have a good heart for the redeeming to be possible.
OK, here's my excerpt. Mine's different in that the exchange is between the heroine and her 15-year-old daughter rather than the H/H.
Her smile turned to a frown as she looked at Lauren whose folded arms and lifted chin announced that she was armed and ready for battle. Before Dori could speak, Lauren mounted her offensive.
“This is my home too. You‘re always saying, ‘Lauren, your friends are welcome in our home any time.’”
Dori was certain that she had never spoken in such a saccharine voice, but she was determined to stay calm. She had to make Lauren understand that tricks and manipulations would not be tolerated. “And your little breakfast party was only an invitation to friends?”
“Eli and Jesse are my friends.”
“Were Eli and Jesse the reasons you planned this?”
“I knew this was about Daddy. You just don’t want him here. You are so paranoid about his not being in this house. ’Max, I have a conflict today, and it will be better if you pick Lauren up at Mom’s.’ As if anybody believed that.”
Her daughter’s mockery grated, but Dori was not getting into a discussion about why she did not want Max here. “Lauren, this discussion is not about your father. It’s about--“
“I hate it when you do that!”
Dori was taken aback by the vehemence in her daughter’s voice. “Hate what?”
“‘Your father’—as if that’s all Daddy is, as if he didn’t even have a name, as if he’s not even a person.”
Dori hesitated. She was guiltily aware that she did refer to Max as “your father” when Lauren worked him into conversations. It was one way of preserving a distance she needed, but she could not let Lauren sidetrack her now. “My concern is not Max, Lauren, nor Eli and Jesse. What bothers me is your deception in springing this on me. I walked downstairs in my pajamas on a Saturday morning and there in the middle of the hall is your fath—Max Marshall.”
Lauren ducked her head, trying to hide her smile.
His smile, Dori thought, her temper rising along with, to her chagrin, her voice. “It is not amusing, no matter what you or your grandmother or anyone else thinks. It was a thoughtless trick that embarrassed me. You can call Jenny and tell her that you will not be going with her today. You can stay at home and groom Boomer instead.”
“What? Mom, you can’t. That is so totally unfair. What about Jenny’s plans?”
“Kait’s going too, so Jenny will still have a friend to share her day. A quiet afternoon will give you time to remember that actions have consequences.”
“But Mrs. Whitley made lunch reservations at Sweet Mama’s, and I’ve been saving money for ages to shop at Felicity’s. Oh, Mom, please! I’ll never ask Daddy here again. Honest. If I do, you can ground me till I’m twenty-one. Mom, Please!”
“Call Jenny, Lauren. Now.”
“You enjoy making me miserable. Gram was right. You have no sense of humor. I feel sorry for you, Mother.” Lauren turned on her heel and stalked from the room.
Dori dropped her head into her hands. It wasn’t even noon, and she had endured the meeting with Max that she had dreaded for weeks and had a fight with Lauren that had raised issues she was not ready to face. A confrontation with her meddling mother still awaited her. Max had been in Gentry less than twenty-four hours and already her peaceful life had erupted into tempests and tantrums.
Ugh! I didn't realize it was quite so long. I apologize.
RE: Tessa's books. A Lady of Persuasion is my favorite of the trilogy. I love Toby!
I woke up late, too, Donna! And I have to leave for work in a couple of minutes but I had to log in and say that I LOVE the excerpts, Marn and Ter. Keep it up!
I also wanted to add my vote to the ordinary person with problems, Ter. I'm reading more and more books like the ones you are describing and it is the characterizations that keep me glued to that page. Those are the types of stories I write too - just regular people trying to fix their childhood and avoid the minefields awaiting them as adults.
Gotta go... check back tonight.
Okay, I had to go back and read Janga's excerpt. LOVE that one too. Well done! I can't wait til you all start publishing and I can get my hands on the whole thing!
Janga's excerpt hits a little too close to home for me. I know very similar altercations are in my future. *sigh*
But I love it. I can't wait to read the whole thing, Janga.
Irish - Thanks for the support. Now, to find an editor that feels the same way. LOL!
Damnit, Janga, if you do not finish this book soon and get it published, I'm going to drive to your house and sit in your yard until you do it. And you're going to be sick of me within 3 days so I suggest just getting a move on and finishing this book already!
Janga, that excerpt is wonderful! Such true emotions and reactions -- even out of context I was sucked right into Dori. Awesome job!
Donna - glad you got to sleep in! I think you're totally right, that it's the deficiency we feel that gets to us. Not only are they perfect, but they're better than us. Not cool!
You're also right on about a lack of flaws often creating a lack of conflict. I think that was one of the things about this particular book I noticed. Because the heroine always responded *so* well, there was no escalating conflict. Problem came up, she dealt with it perfectly. Problem came up, she dealt with it. I wanted to see her totally screw up and the problem become bigger, the conflict to grow and the stakes to go up, you know? That's not to say there wasn't conflict in this book - that was the weird part. There was tons of conflict, good, spicy, scary conflict. But it was like each conflict popped up individually, and then was solved easily and reasonably. Then the next conflict popped up and was solved. Without the heroine ever screwing up, nothing grew and got bigger.
I don't know if that makes any sense at all! Maybe I need more coffee this morning :)
Renee - your heroine sounds amazing! I love women who can shoot a man but not a horse. Hilarious!
You said, But she does all these other things that shows how pure and honest her heart is. I can't agree enough how important that is. I love characters who do the "wrong thing" now and then (like misquote scripture or shoot a guy), but have a pure and honest heart. You just want to cheer for her!
Ter said, After all, so much of writing romance is about redeeming characters. They have to do something that requires redeeming, but they have to have a good heart for the redeeming to be possible.
Exactly! Just like Ely was saying about flat characters versus those that grow on an arc. If there in a place where they're mature, self-actualized, non-neurotic, and open to give and receive love, then what are we reading about? Their perfect romance? Bleck. Give me a character would a beautiful heart and catty streak who has to learn to keep her mouth shut. Much more fun!
Irish - wow, all sorts of people are getting to sleep in this morning! I'm so jealous *g*
You said, Those are the types of stories I write too – just regular people trying to fix their childhood and avoid the minefields awaiting them as adults.
I love this. So succinct, and so true. We all have those leftover neurotic issues from childhood that manage to screw everything up in the present!
Thanks everyone for your compliments.
Janga and Bo'sun - great excerpts. :)
I'm back from a great lunch -- now I've got to catch up again!
Janga, nice excerpt. My ovaries nudged me and said, "Psst, this is why we didn't want to have kids." I'm glad Dori didn't give in, and I *need* to know more about Max. :)
Renee, I would love to read your story, just from the heroine's description!
Hal, sounds like the conflict in the book you mention is more of the "Whack-A-Mole" variety. So yeah it's cool that she can take care of it, but only if she's racking up points for a cool stuffed animal prize. LOL
And I need more coffee. I NEVER sleep this late, and it's discombulated me entirely. I mean, I barely got up in time to get ready for my afternoon nap! LOL
Oh to have the life of Donna. Think I'll have a Green Monster drink. Where did Chance lock that rum?
Oh, God -- I didn't mean to sound "high maintenance". LOL Seriously. I'm not employed, teetering on the brink of financial ruin, and these allergies have kicked me in the nuts, which is why I'm so tired.
Is that better? :)
Sounds like maybe you need a drink too. And an ice pack for those nuts. *cringe*
LOL -- nah, that's okay. I wasn't using them anyway!
And I'll stick with the coffee I just brewed. So I can keep my eyes open. :)
LMAO!!! Ice packs for the phantom nuts that have been sorely abused.
And I think there's another drink here: Bruised Phantom Nuts. You can put the icepack in it instead of ice cubes!
We should do a parody blog called PHANTOM NUTS OF THE OPERA!
Hellie - get right on that.
You'll have to excuse me, I'm high on paint fumes.
LOL. I'd definitely see that show. As long as the heroine wasn't, you know, annoyingly perfect. LOL
I guess we haven't had a Phantom of the Opera parody yet, have we? (I'm not a fan of Phantom of the Opera which is probably the problem.) But I do love the song Music of the Night...
It's been a while since we've had a parody.
I love that song too! I drug the hubby to Phantom on Broadway, and when we walked out, I turned to him and said, "So, did you like it?" He looked at me for a second, scratched his head, and said, "I have no idea what the f*ck just happened." LOL! He is NOT a fan! I don't know if I like the story itself so much, but it was so much fun to see live.
Sorry I'm AWOL crew...just haven't come up for air at the right time of day to get on line. Tomorrow is the mall and I know almost no one will see this post... But I miss ya!
and the key...well, it's....
;)
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