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Rewind to our first time...
Everything We Know About Writin’ We Learned From Captain Jack Sparrow
Monday, October 1st, 2007
The crew members have pointed out perhaps we should give a bit of a brief statement about us and our ship. We are writing pirates on the ship, Romance Writer’s Revenge, which we all credit the naming of to Terrio, whom you’ll meet in a minute. Keep your britches on.
Our mission is to…well, be pirates. Okay, not like that. We’re different. We like to bathe. Not together. Get your minds out of the gutter.
We’ve banded together, rebels, who write because there is no greater freedom than that which can be found between the pages of… *tomato thrown at her by Boatswain Terrio* Hey! *glowering* We’re eating that later. Once we acquire a cook. Now mind yourself, or I’ll turn the Captain’s Daughter on you.
Please let me introduce Quartermaster Sin. *pointing to a leggy brunette who looks like she’d as soon kick your ass as look at you, dressed in black, all black* Nearly six-feet tall and enough to give the rest of us inferiority complexes if we thought about it too much. She writes like a hurricane, and this is without the bionic hand she wishes she could have.
*pointing to a shorter (who isn’t shorter than QM Sin?) auburn-haired pirate in blues and silvers, black knee boots looking particularly fetish-like* This is Boatswain Terrio, our chief petty officer (emphasis on petty) and here to boost our morale. *Terrio swishes cat-o-nine tails* Despite the accessories and pirate attire, Terrio writes contemporary romance without a single whip to be featured in it.
If you want whips, I suggest reading Sin’s stuff. I’d tell you what she writes, but on any given day, I doubt Sin could tell me. *grins*
Over here, *pointing to a young woman straddling a cannon, looking quite at home* is Powder Monkey Lisa. We’ve just acquired her to load the cannons–I hear she’s wonderful with big guns. She also writes contemporary romance, but I believe she prefers to call it “smut.” Poor gel, the only thing worth writing, really.
And I am Captain Hellion. I doubt any introductions are necessary.
Don your eye patch and brandish your sword, you’re about to learn to be a writer the pirate way.
1.)Establish your reputation. “But you have heard of me,” Jack says smugly, when Norrington comments that Jack’s the worst pirate he’s ever heard of. Network, network, network. The more people who know you in the business, the better chance you’ll have to show you mean to make writing your career. Jack established he was a pirate—and we all know he’s the best pirate there is. He said so. That being said….
2.)Believe in yourself. There isn’t anyone who believes more in Jack’s credentials as the world’s best pirate than Jack himself; and frankly, you, as a writer, need to do the same. Writing is a lonely business; and being left alone with your inner critic day in and day out can have you questioning your career path. Even when Jack is feeling a bit down, he knows deep down he is a great pirate—and you must do the same. Like Jack, perhaps a bit of rum will help. It’s certainly done a lot for my manuscript.
3.)Stop being a pirate…er…writer? Never! Jack didn’t have a ship, a crew, or even a bottle of rum; however, he was still a pirate. Think of yourself in similar terms: you’re a writer first. It’s not just a hobby; it’s not something to hide or do only when you’ve made everyone else happy. If you consider yourself as a writer first, people will also start to think of you that way—and it will be easier to carve out more time for writing because people will expect it.
4.)Have fun. Do you think Jack likes being a pirate? No, Jack loves being a pirate; he embraces it. He says, “Pirate.” So if people are staring at you oddly when you’re jotting down brilliant tidbits on napkins, laughing manically to yourself, and correcting the grammar on restaurant menus, just give them the Captain Jack look and say, ‘Writer.’”
5.)Be on the lookout for new treasure. Jack never failed to find bits of treasure lying about—usually unwatched—which he could immediately pocket. Pay attention to your surroundings. Life is absurd and full of characters. You’ll never know when you find the perfect real life person to portray your quirky Lord Herrington. (Disclaimer: while Captain Jack does abscond, most roguishly, with unprotected treasure, he does not steal copyrighted treasure—and neither should you.)
6.)Speak and deliver. Jack is an Ace at one-liners (“Savvy?”), and he’s memorable in practically everything he says. Memorable writing keeps readers running to the store for your next book—so be loud, be proud, and be your own voice, not anyone else’s…and you’ll be as memorable and beloved as Jack.
7.)Get into character. There would not have been a Pirates of the Caribbean without Captain Jack Sparrow. He made that movie; no doubt about it. Plot is great; plot tells the story, but characters sell books and keep readers wanting more. Create great characters and you’ll have a great book, even if your virgin secretary is having a secret baby.
8.)Get into trouble. If there’s anything Jack does well, it’s get into trouble. Then he spends an inordinate amount of time trying to get out of it, only making it worse. And we love him for it. Do the same to your characters. Where there’s trouble, there’s conflict; where there’s conflict, there’s story. Give your characters a ship, then blow holes in it.
9.)Seize the “Opportune Moment.” Jack knows how to create his own luck and seize opportunity. He doesn’t wait for people to bring him treasure; he takes it. Therefore, don’t keep your finished manuscripts lurking under the bed because you don’t think they’re polished enough for an editor’s eagle eye. Query, query, query. Rejection is a part of the business, even pirate business. Jack might get slapped now and again, but he still thinks he’s quite the catch.
10.)Find a dependable crew. Did Jack face nasty Barbossa alone? No. He took some equally rum-soaked pirates with him. You should do the same. Find like-minded, rum-soaked writers and sail the treacherous waters of the Slush Pile and Critic’s Hell. Every once in a while you’ll hit upon treasure—and in the meantime, you’ll have a lot of fun doing it!
11.)Be daft (like Jack). People are going to think you’re daft for wanting to write a book, and even dafter for going through the crap shoot of getting it published. There will be plot twists that will even have you thinking, “They’ll think I’m a lunatic. I can’t have an alien abduction at a Regency tea party!” But as Jack says, when his madness is brought into question, “Well thank goodness for that, ’cause if I wasn’t this would probably never work.” If you over think your ideas and don’t allow your “madness” room to romp in your manuscript, you’ll end up with a book that is overdone, trite, and not at all in your original voice.
12.)Savvy that “they’re more like guidelines anyway.” Learn the rules of writing–then break them. Put a twist on them and make them your own. Except for that rule about spelling and grammar–that’s one you shouldn’t break. Nothing more annoying to the Grammar from Hell Editor than a misspelled manuscript. But most everything else is fair game, Jack says.
Whatever your writing genre, find your strengths, strengthen your weaknesses and walk that plank of being a writer. If you take the chance and follow Captain Jack’s advice, you might end up Captain yourself.
What has the fair and witty Jack taught you about writing (or living)?
***
Wow, we hadn't even kidnapped Marnee yet. Hells was just as cheeky then as she is now. Wench.
Books by the Crew
52 comments:
Ah, answers so much... I won't even object ta darlin' Hector bein' portrayed as nasty... Only the first movie had come out, none knew how he'd redem himself come the last.
What 'as Jack taught me? Take chances, not only the 2nd chance...but all of 'em.
I be thinkin' the 2nd movie and third shoulda' brought a few more lessons 'bout writin'...
Foller yer heart, even if it goes 'gainst the grain a' what ya know. As Jack did when he rose ta challenge a bein' a hero and goin' back ta his Black Pearl, takin' that long shot and buyin' them time. Ya didn't have an appointment ta pitch? But ya see the editor in the elevator? Go on, do it!
Talk ta yerself, it helps ya make it through the mad times.
Sometimes, ya jus' got ta convince others by doin' it. Tip the boat? Don't explain...go wit' yer convinctions and trust that others will foller. (Fav scene a' the movie.)
I'm sure there be others...
How about that, even my hair color has changed since we started this journey. (True, it changes every six weeks. Whatever.)
Wonderful blog! There are so many examples of Hellie brilliance in these archives, we should have a "Best of Hellie" week.
I too was going to mention the follow yer heart bit. I'm a pretty straight-laced pirate and tend to think I'm headed in one direction without any other options. I need a reminder that it's okay to veer off the given path.
Having a compass that points to my heart's desire would be awesome handy.
I'm down with the Best of Hellie week. I might even pull out the post it note blog she so fond of and post it in her honor. lol
Chanceroo, I have conversations with myself just not in my outside voice. I think that makes me doubly crazy.
And we all know I hate the topic of compasses. Every time the moral compass comes up in conversation I want to bash someone over the head with my skewed one.
That was WEEKEND roadtrip. I do not take a roadtrip weekly, thank goodness.
Sin - I used that post-it blog this week and now have a lovely storyboard covered in yellow post-it notes. I need to pretty it up with the pink and purple notes, but I love it. Total convert and can't imagine writing a book without this.
During my weekly roadtrip, I kept hearing some radio ad where kids said what they wanted for Christmas. It was things like ninja skills and a moral compass. Made me think of this crew everytime I heard it. :)
I get hives when I think about storyboards.
But it's awesome! It's like creating a frame to build a house on. You can still paint the walls whatever you want and pick fancy floor tiles and furniture later. But having that frame feels SO much better to me.
I'm turning red and blotchy.
For me, to see something like that visually kills what I have in my head. While it frees up some writers, it's a cage for me. Different strokes for different people.
Fine, be that way.
LOL!
Ha. I will. :P
I'm sure Hells can recount the horrified look on my face when she started storyboarding (at the time) Sadie's book.
Darn didn't finish...
I missed the debut, but I've seen these guidelines and thought, who knew a pirate could be so inspirational for a writer? I love each and every one of them for many reasons. Each is more important at a different time; family think I'm wasting time? Think (haven't said it out loud)<
think writer. Okay, lots more reasons, but I was cut off and lost my train of thought. LOL But I've learned lots and have my Helli wisdom of not to over think, most of all. Just write.
Okay, "not to over think" isn't exactly the entire bit of wisdom, but that's how I shorten in my head the bit of (yes, I'm repeating my personal favorite again):
Don’t overthink it; just write what you know now and work through it. I find my brain likes to keep secrets from me and it’s better if I just trust it to know what’s going on more than I do. I’m just here to transcribe the dictation.
Wow -- what a great list! I knew Jack was your inspiration, but I didn't know why (I've just found you pirates a while ago). I've been such a fan of Jack (only the first movie though -- which I've got on DVD and watch all the time), and now I can count him as my mentor. It doesn't get any better than that!
Welcome aboard, Donna! No matter when you found us, we're just happy ya did. And I'd recommend watching the other two movies. Jack only gets better. (And in the beginning of the third, he actually multiplies!)
Amazing to learn we actual have a method to all this madness, huh?
Melissa - It's nice to know someone is being helped by all the stuff we throw out here. (Obviously, Hellie more than the rest of us.) Goodness knows we don't always help ourselves. LOL!
And I'm not good with that "only taking dictation" thing. Mostly because there isn't anything sitting in my head waiting to come out. There are surprises my characters tell me about or that show up while talking to other writers, but I don't think it's hiding in my brain anywhere. :)
And I’m not good with that “only taking dictation” thing.
That's what I'm always fascinated about...that everyone's process is different and it's personal. Not everyone has the same light bulb moments.
But I've been finding it funny (in a nice way!) a bit that you're a convert to storyboarding. I did find the "post-it" blog (Plotting for Dummies?) in the archives and your comments were not "on board" for storyboarding. :) I haven't tried it either but think I will with the next...whenever I get to the next.
That's the blog. Pretty much anything that looked like school work, while I was still in school, I was not going to be on board with. LOL! In the last six months I've learned, as much of a multi-tasker as I am, my brain can't focus on two LARGE tasks at once. It's like when school ended, the gates of writing opened.
And you can ask Hellie, this storyboard did not happen without a bit of whining. LOL!
Hellie seems to be AWOL today. Huh.
It's snowing pretty hard here. She might have stayed hibernated at her place.
I was once the secretary for a committee but couldn't stand it for long. Everything was so predictable that I usually wrote the minutes before the meeting and didn't need to edit them very much. I resigned of course, giving boredom as the reason!
I can only vaguely remember the launch of this blog, but I do believe I was following the likes of Sin, Terri and Helli from the EJ BB. Sort of stalking I guess. Such a fascinating bunch and totally unpredictable. Quite the opposite of my committee!
When Sin bats her eyelids I instinctively duck and when she flirts, my head spins out of control. Can't help loving her. La femme formidable makes me feel like James bond on a mission! 8)
Terri is the sensible one, full of ambition to improve and with deep insights into human nature. She may struggle with the writing at times but if she sticks with her vision she is heading for the big time. She is the one I seek out for advice.
Helli, bless her, defies all descriptions. She is argumentative and provoking at times, especially when I stir (Q-stir again ... thank you Chance!), but for her brilliant parodies and visions of odd facets of life, especially the male psyche, I stand in awe.
This pirate crew is phenomenal and with Marnee Lisa Chance and Hayley on board, who could resist.
Keep it up crew, you are all absolutely fabulous! :D
And Q - This ship would NOT be the same without you. Thanks for sticking with us in all our cantankerous ways and whining.
The idea of a quantum physicist coming to *me* for advice of any kind is flattering. LOL! I'm gobsmacked!
What Q has failed to mention is that he followed the three of us in the taudriest little virtual strip club on the EJ BB, CandiLand. Since sent to the depths of the archives for how naughty it was. We even had an NC-17 rating, I think. LOL!
We're much more subdued over here. ;)
We’re much more subdued over here.
LOL!
Hard to believe, but true. We were very bad in CandiLand.
I could fix that in a hurry, ya know? Anyone gotta candy cane I need to slide down?
We should have a best of CandiLand week.
Snow...
*shiver
We be comin' out from under the rain fer a few hours... It's nice. CA reacts so well ta the first week a' good rain. No deep mud, yet.
NC-17 ratin'? I wonder what our ratin' be?
Arrrrrrr?
(Am I the only one that remembers that movie rating?)
Sin pegged me. It snowed and I went, "I have too much personal time to bother with bad drivers and leave way earlier in the morning so I can stare at my work walls for 8 hours." So I called in and went back to bed. Now I've finally woken up again--that step class kicked my ass--and am fixing, um, lunch. Damn. I did watch a little of TODAY this morning before I fell asleep. *LOL*
I think it's stopped snowing now.
Anyone gotta candy cane I need to slide down?
I'm guessing this is more aimed at Q than the rest of us. I hope so anyway.
I'll say it again: Hellie really is a genius at connecting writing to all sorts of things. I love this blog!
I'm with Sin on the storyboarding. I know it works for lots of people, but just thinking about it makes me hypervintilate.
Give your characters a ship, then blow holes in it.
Now that's good advice. I'm working on blowing holes in the ship today. I thought I'd written a too early HEA, but then a child ran away. . .
CandiLand was too risque for an innocent like me. :) I do remember the discussions it provoked.
Yeah, like "Should we ban these chicks from the BB?"
Ter, I thought CandiLand was the response to that question. No one was forced to visit CandiLand after all, and the rest of the board stayed "family friendly"--more or less. :)
That's true. We did warn them before clicking that CandiLand was not a place for the faint of heart.
And in the history of the board, CandiLand was one of the saner phases. LOL! There were some *interesting* characters over there at times.
Speaking of a virtual strip club, I'm surprised there are more stripper poles on this vessel.
Well, speakin' fer mself, I don't want ta scare anyone by attemptin' anything involvin' a stripper pole...
Paramedics or those who might be blinded by me magnificent body... ;-)
Yes, Hel, I know, in the virtual world, I can have the stupendously gifted athletically perfect body a' me dreams... But it's funner ta talk about me real self...)
Wow, taking it back to the beginning! This blog is great. :) I think I started a month or so after you guys. Yes?
I belonged to the EJ BB but I rarely visited. For some reason, my computer logged me out all the time and the forum style BBs always get me confused.
I'm easily confused. I'm sure I don't have to tell any of you that.
And this was a piece of brilliance....
I've always enjoyed the books out there about what certain books teach us. The Philosophy of Buffy the Vampire Slayer was great. So was The Philosophy of Lord of the Rings.
But we need one about PotC... Come on, Hel. You could write that in a weekend!
What a brilliant blog post. I missed it the first time, I think. Glad you brought it back to us. Very inspiring.
But we need one about PotC… Come on, Hel. You could write that in a weekend!
Oh! What a great idea! Just to throw this out there, but maybe a compilation of the Revenge's blog posts in book form? Seriously. That would be a great writing craft book. Writing the Pirate Way or something. Maybe even, dare I say it, self publish it. I think how-to books would do better than genre fiction. Lulu.com is free as long as you figure out your formatting...just sayin. It's fun to think of how you could organize it...by topics, chronological, split into volumes...anyways, it would great. This best of of blogs is great too, but in book form? I'd buy it. :)
Oh, take the points from today's blog...one per chapter... Add in a few from the sequels...and viola!
Maybe add in the drink menu as a joke at the end... ;-)
Sorry, I'm excited. *LOL*
Exactly, Chance! The Pirate spin is essential, of course. There could be all kinds of fun "breaks" - you know, those quotes broken out...maybe dig into the comments? I bet you pirates could have a great visually and inspirational book that puts the gems in the archives out for everyone. :)
That is an awesome idea! But we'd need some objective observer to put it together for us. One who knows a thing or two about formatting a self-pubbed book.
Know anybody like that? LOL!
This really would be cool. Would definitely put us on the map!
A booklet if not an entire book... Would be too great!
LOL! Me and my big mouth. Okay, it's easier said than done. The end product without any bells and whistles (color or pictures) still makes the end product expensive. So, I admit, it's the same problem here. And you'd really have to consider limiting the number of pages to make it inexpensive. Maybe not worth it. I still think it's a great idea for a book though. Pitched to a traditional publisher, I'd see it kind of like a couple of books I have called A Writer's Book of Days: A Spirited Companion for the Writing Life (Judy Reeves, 1999) and Walking on Alligators: A Book of Meditations for Writers (Susan Shaughnessy, 1993). When I think about it, these books are blogs before there were blogs. I think people still want to have something in their hands, and it seems almost sad that great blogs get hidden in the archives. :)
And I go back to the great pitch of the Pirate theme. That's what makes it different and unique as each of you are. Come on, get it in a book... somehow. :)
I admit, I'd dream of recycling blogs if I had enough material accumulated, but even if I ever do, I wouldn't have the great theme to tie it together. And my blogs aren't as good...but that's beside the point. LOL
Okay, I'll have to think about this and see if there might be some options. Even a Writing Pirate calendar would be fun.
Gosh all those Pirate Writing Rules sounded soooo hard. And then it hit me " Hey wait a minute! I can do #11!"
Hey, even a small hand-done collection would be fun to put together. Have everyone expand and write a blog on the rules Hellie listed...Pick yer favorite, or let Hel assign them.
It would be fun to pitch, I must say. Deb, at Sourcebooks? I cornered her in a hallway once...
*snicker
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