Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Choosing a POV


 


It’s been a long summer for me.  Health issues among my loved ones have twisted my personal life up.  Lots of emotion, lots of drama.  And it’s not over yet.


At the end of July, I told myself that I needed to get back in the saddle, finish my WIP.  I had 25-30K left to get to the end of the first draft, completely doable in a month and a half if I put my nose to the grindstone.  I generally write about 5K a week, so I figured if I settled in through August and into Sept, I could finish by my vacation (the week of Sept 12).  That was the tentative goal.


I wrote some.  About 10K.  But last week, as I was reading through that 10K, something was way off. 


It didn’t speak to me.  Didn’t reach in and grab my heart like it needed to. 


I grumbled.  I pondered.  In general, I stopped writing for a couple days and just stared at the screen with my face all scrunched up. 


There was the story, the plot I wanted to tell.  Even the stuff happening was pretty compelling, I thought.  It just felt…  FLAT.


And then, after a couple of days of silence, it struck me.  It wasn’t the story that was the problem.  It was the narrator.


In each of the scenes I’d written, I’d chosen the wrong narrator.  There were 8 scenes.  That’s a lot of mistaken point of views. 


I can only assume that at the time, for the most part, I didn’t want to play in the more painful point of view.  Or, if I did, the emotions were off, either too little or too much.  I spent this past week flipflopping point of views and it reads a lot better now.  I even got moving forward again.


But the whole experience really highlighted how important it is to get the narrative point of view right.  And sometimes the best choice for the narrator isn’t the character that is hurting.  Sometimes the best choice is the character doing the damage.  For example, here’s a snippet.  This is from my hero’s point of view as my heroine is begging him not to put his life in danger.


********


            “It’s too much, even for all of you.  We need to think this through.  We need a better plan.”   


                “We?” He snorted.  “There is no we here.  This is my show, Sarah.”         


                She jerked as if he’d slapped her.  He heard Cass suck in a ragged breath, but he didn’t look at him or Ice, just watched the play of emotions on Sarah’s face, in her eyes.  Shit.  That didn’t come out right at all.  His fists clenched. 


                “I see,” she whispered and those two little words ripped his chest open. 


                He softened his voice, vowing that when this night was over, he’d make this all up to her.  Somehow.  “This isn’t about us.  This is about me going after Cartwright.  Maybe the only chance we’ll have at him.”


*********


It's pretty rough but I hope you get the what I mean.  Initially I wrote this in Sarah’s POV and she paused at the “There is no we here” to do too much introspection, essentially to ponder her navel.  It slowed things down.  And I think this works as well, without the major existential meltdown.


So what do you think?  How do you decide which POV to write each scene in, if you write 3rd?  If you write 1st, how do you get around keeping the emotion from being too close or too far away?  Any scenes in books you wish had been in a different POV or any authors that do this very well?


 

73 comments:

2nd Chance said...

My condolences on the rough months...had some a' those two years ago, right round this time, so I can sympathize...

POV...I don't chose. Me characters choose, I jus' take dictation.

I know, I'm nuts.

But yer example is prime. I can see how it works so much better in his POV, because it makes it easier fer his pain ta come through also... Hers be summed up beautifully in that 'no we here.' Very evocative.

Tiffany Clare said...

I wonder if the POV comes as second nature to us over time? I don't question what I'm doing in my chosen POV, but sometimes others (CPs & my editor) have said, add a scene in here with this person's POV. So I have. And it does add to/strengthen the overall story.

I think I prefer to stay in the female protagonist's POV when I'm writing. Probably because I think it's easier for me to reach a reader through my heroine's introspect and experiences. Allows for a more visceral punch :) So I have to remind myself 'you haven't done your hero's POV... get to it.' And I write in third so I think readers generally expect the author to show both sides of the spectrum. Especially in romance.

Marnee Jo said...

Chance- Thanks sweetie! In the past couple months I've had two people very close diagnosed with cancer. A sibling and a very close friend. It's just been a roller coaster ride.

But thanks for the compliment. I was trying to find an example to prove what I was talking about, because my blog's a little scattered today, I think. LOL!!

Tiff - I'm glad things have gotten easier for you over time! And I think CPs can be really helpful in this. I can see how the heroine's POV can allow for a heavier punch, though. :)

haleigh said...

I love the snippet, Marn!

I've run into this problem a lot. Usually it's the same problem - something feels off or flat and I can't figure out why. And usually it's because I'm in the wrong POV.

We're taught to always pick the character with the most at stake. but sometimes that's hard to tell. I agree that sometimes it's the one doing the hurting that has the most at stake, not the one being hurt.

terrio said...

Hugs to you, sweetie. Great blog and I'm loving this excerpt. To me, the reason this works as it does is because if you were in Sarah's POV, then the reader only sees this guy as a jerk and feels for her. This way, the reader knows he's not a jerk, and you feel the hurt for both of them.

To me, it's all about the impact. Which POV will give the best impact on the reader. My favorite scenes are the ones in which I can feel the author's hand reach into my chest and rip out my heart. But if I don't feel the hurt for both characters, then I can fall back on anger and indignation on behalf of one or the other.

Before a scene, I try to figure out what I want to reveal or accomplish, then in which POV that can best happen. I'm not saying I always get it right, but I try. :)

haleigh said...

I've never thought of it like that Ter - of choosing a POV that let's you hurt for both characters. That's really excellent - thanks!

Kelly said...

Sorry for the rough time you're having. I'll keep positive thoughts for you for health and sanity.

POV is a bit instinctual for me. I go with whichever character just feels right for a scene. No real method to the madness, and maybe when I (finally) get to the end of my WIP someone will yell, "No, no, and hell NO" about the POVs I've chosen, but it's what works for now.

But you do make a point about POV impacting the amount of introspection. I tend to write a lot of introspection, and am trying to break that habit. This is food for thought. Great blog!

Melissa said...

Oh, the POV. *long sigh* In my opinion, it's the most complicated and difficult area of writing to master. I started out with a lot of headhopping, and I mean A LOT. lol If I'd never taken the step to let others critique my work, I have no doubt my POV would still be all over there.

I was so frustrated 3/4 of the way through my first manuscript (not exactly because of POV but because of the big love scene) that I started a new project. That in itself was hard because I'd told myself (for years!) that I wasn't allowed to touch anything else until I'd finished. But, after convincing myself I was "on a break" -- and having a long discussion promising my poor characters I wouldn't leave them in limbo before their love scene forever, (lol) -- I started a new project to tackle to "practice" the love scene with a new set of characters. And I told myself, "I ain't messing with this POV business. Something has to lock me in, so I'm just going to write in either 1st person or ONE POV for the whole darn thing."

First person didn't work for me, although I DO think it can help for locking in or deepening the POV. But I chose one POV, the hero. While I do agree with Tiffany that both sides is expected in a romance, I had read a few books with just one POV and liked it. It IS deeper the longer you stay in one character's head, and for a "headhopper" it is a different experience.

Two other reasons why I think one POV is right for THIS story is, 1) I'm also writing a hero who is a GHOST. Or is he? The "or is he?" is another reason I CANNOT slip to the heroine or another's POV. 2) The heroine is someone who is dealing with mental illness issues (complicated by sensing her ghost husband!) and it's better NOT to be too close to her, or in her head. I hope the sympathy for her character comes from the hero's observations in his POV.

When I do go back to a more traditional romance, I will have to deal with my POV issues. I have to believe that yes, it does get more natural with time - - and practice!

Marnee Jo said...

Hal - Thanks! :) I know you and I have definitely chatted other times about different POVs for different scenes. But I think you're right in agreeing with Terri. I think that the idea of picking the POV that allows us to see both sides of the pain is the best one....

Ter - Brilliance from you my dear! I think you're right. When I wrote this from her POV, he just seemed so closed off, so much of a big jerk. This sort of smoothed that over. Later in this scene she begs him not to go and tells him that she loves him. And he's so shocked at her feelings, that someone loves him, that he misses his opportunity to say anything. Imagine how that looked from her POV. He was jerk with a J, not just jerk. LOL!

But yes yes to the POV that shows both pain. I think that works best.

Marnee Jo said...

Kelly - thanks for the good thoughts. :) And ah, the dreaded introspection. I know that's one of my first revision readthroughs. Just to take out some of the internal monologue, see if I can show with dialogue instead. LOL!!

But it is something that usually you can catch at the end.

I think I wouldn't have stopped now with these POV problems if they weren't messing up the emotional stuff in my story. I felt like I couldn't keep going without fixing it.

Marnee Jo said...

Melissa - Your story sounds so interesting! So you're writing a 3rd person, one POV from the hero's perspective? How interesting!! :) And I like the idea of ghost stories. I started something with a "ghost" in the fall, but set it aside for now (the story I'm currently working on took over for me). But that is very interesting. And a good exercise. :)

One of my CPs is writing a 1st person heroine/3rd person hero story. (at least as of last night she is.) LOL! I think that should be interesting to see play out.

Melissa said...

Marnee, I suspect lots of the internal introspection you initially wrote will be put to good use. Maybe in a different part of the story or it just helped you get a handle on Sarah's character. :)

terrio said...

Marn - Didn't this come up in the black moment of your first MS? I seem to remember liking that scene because he was breaking her heart, but we saw it from his POV so we didn't hate him.

As to the introspection stuff, I have almost none. LOL! And when I throw in a paragraph of it, Hellie always tells me to take it out. Really, I should probably get some in there. Oddly enough, the POV stuff is easier for me, and so many other areas are harder.

Melissa said...

Oh! Marnee, I once read a comment I think you posted here mentioning Wanda Sykes, I think her name is, and if it's the same person I think of who submitted some first person work to a romance writer's critique site, I absolutely adored her writing. I can vividly recall her stories. Please let her know I love her work!

Marnee Jo said...

Oh, and Melissa - Usually when I cut introspection out, I do end up using something I learned from it. Just not always in the format that I initially wrote it. :)

Marnee Jo said...

Ter - it did come up with my first MS! I totally forgot that!! :)

And you're lucky if you can avoid it. I find myself cutting stuff out all the time. The problem with introspection is that too often it feels like telling. The dreaded telling. LOL!!

Melissa - I think I mentioned Wanda Seaman. She gave the synopsis recipe that I use. :)

Melissa said...

Marnee - Yes, it was Wanda Seaman and her synopsis recipe. I think I mentioned a comedian's name. Oops. LOL

Hellie said...

This blog is so timely. Thank you, Marn. I've been having difficulties with whose POV a scene should be in; and many times I'll take the easy way and try a scene in a secondary character's POV because they're more entertaining--when the story is not about them.

And sometimes the best choice for the narrator isn’t the character that is hurting. Sometimes the best choice is the character doing the damage.

This is a GREAT statement! I love this!

And I don't mind introspection of characters between dialogue--so long as it's not so much that we forget what they were talking about to begin with. Sometimes I'll have introspection on a character and later I'll be like, "God that sounds like the worst WE channel movie/Hallmark commercial/granola crunchie bull crap I've ever read, no real person contemplates their navel that much except Hamlet and he's been done already."

I let my women characters introspect more since women tend to analyze more; and God knows I analyze and reanalyze everything. WHAT DID HE MEAN WHEN HE SAID THAT?

I try not to let male characters introspect much. If they are introspecting, they're drinking at the time. Mostly if they got dealt a comment they didn't want to hear, they think, "That was dirty."--and then proceeds to trash right back. At no point does the male character try to figure out WHY that person said the dirty comment or if it might be true.

Sin said...

Marn, I hope everything gets better. *hug*

I love the snippet. It's a good choice to go through his POV instead of hers. I can see what you say when you wrote it through hers, you have a chance to see her internalize it and think about what he said, instead of just keeping the conversation rolling.

Since I write primarily first person POV and I'm stuck in a POV regardless if it's my POV being a jerk or someone is being a jerk to her, it's hard to keep characters from internalizing bits and pieces of the conversation. I try to think of it this way- while I'm writing the female FP POV I try to keep the internalization to a minimum. I tell myself that if I was having this conversation with someone else, I would think about everything they were telling me, but I also wouldn't let it show and would keep up the conversation like any other.

So while Dex may tell Kiki that she's a pain in the ass but he loves her anyway, and while Kiki has always known deep down that Dex loves her but never expected him to tell her that considering their past and present situation, she internalizes it for a brief second (stunned of course) and instead, turns it around and makes a sarcastic comment like she didn't even hear the love part.

And since I'm working on a FP POV with two females, I'm not sure there is any scene I want to do in a different POV. I prefer to stay in the female POV regardless of what I'm writing.

Hellie said...

And when I throw in a paragraph of it, Hellie always tells me to take it out.

I don't make you take out all of it, but we don't need a Ralph Waldo Emerson poetic dissertation of why the character is alone in the world and the significance of it.

It's like Marn was saying above when she switched POVs because the introspection slowed the pacing down. Not all introspection--just the long drawn out kind where when the dialogue picks up again, you (as the reader) go, "What were they talking about again?" I've read books where that happens. I can feel the pace slow and I read the introspection--and fine, she was a lonely little girl and she had no friends, blah, blah, blah, and she hasn't answered his question? He asked a question? When? Oh, he asked she had a good day at work. What the hell did that have to do with her childhood?

Don't bore your reader; don't confuse your reader; don't distract your reader--you do not want the reader to put down your book.

Melissa said...

Helli says, Don’t bore your reader; don’t confuse your reader; don’t distract your reader.

I love that! Another snippet for my wall. :)

terrio said...

I like when the introspection takes on more of an internal dialogue. My heroine will be talking to her best friend and as she's relating an event, there are bits she doesn't want to reveal. So it'll go something like, "I realized it was his cologne on my shirt." Because he kissed me. "I'm not sure what happened, and I right now I don't want to think about it." Because he kissed me.

That makes no sense out of context and it's not the exact lines, but you get the idea.

Sabrina said...

Don’t bore your reader; don’t confuse your reader; don’t distract your reader.

That's going on a T-shirt and on a post-it above my computer.

Sin said...

An astute best friend would know that her best friend got kissed. LOL

terrio said...

Oh, Miranda calls her on it. She doesn't push, but she clearly knows Celi is hiding something and that much more has happened between her and Bryan.

There are reasons for Celi not to admit the encounter.

Hellie said...

*LOL* I love those kinds of internal dialogue/introspection reveals. Those are the best. I think they're the best at showing and not telling character--sometimes introspection ends up telling us how the character is when a few choice lines like Terri just did would say so much more about the character.

The reader doesn't want or need to be told everything about the character. You have to trust the reader is intelligent to fill in some things on their own--we want to fill in some things for ourselves. And then later at the end if that info is revealed, we're like, "Oh, we're so smart!" *LOL*

hal said...

I love those little snippets of introspection. Esp ones where the character lies, and thinks the exact opposite of what's about to come out of their mouth.

Like:
He grinned down at her, that sideways smirk that always made her stomach flip. "Admit it. You want me."
God, yes. "Not really. There's just no spark."

hal said...

I've got to stop using the word that

terrio said...

If I had a dime for everytime I type "that" and then delete it, I'd be well off.

BUT, if I had a dime for everytime I type "just" then delete it, I'd be Bill-freaking-Gates.

Marnee Jo said...

Hellie - I'm glad I helped! :) And there is definitely a big difference between how women and men introspect. My DH and I were just cracking up about this last night. The whole joke with the husband and wife's diaries. The wife is all angsting that her husband isn't talking to her, thinking he must be having an affair. That night they have sex but she just thinks it's not right and that their relationship must be over. And it's all this long misery riddled stuff. And the husband's diary is like, "Putted for shit this morning. At least I got laid."

LOL!

Marnee Jo said...

Sin - thanks for the snippet compliment. :) And I think that this is one of the major reasons why writing 1st just wouldn't work for me. I don't know if I do what you described well. The whole introspection thing in 1st just confuses me to no end.

Hellie - I've read books like that too, where I was like, "wait, what was this conversation doing anyway?" Chances are, if it happened too often, I put the book down. LOL!!

Marnee Jo said...

I love when they say the opposite of what they're thinking too. Great deep POV. :)

Melissa said...

Oh, keep the "that." lol I've gotten tired of someone always saying to cut "that" (AND just) when it's a natural expression of how we talk and part of what makes the writing smooth. Your snippet doesn't make sense without the "thats." If it does make sense without we should cut, of course. lol

Melissa said...

Those internal snippets within the dialogue are great for deeper POV. I'm busy writing more notes again.

I read somewhere that you can tell it's not a deep POV if there is melodrama or, what clicked with me, if it would be something embarrassing to witness in real life; to see complete strangers showing powerful emotions that mean nothing to us. That's where I think the internal introspection comes in, to give us restraint and a chance to pull back and make it more believable.

hal said...

Melissa - is that from the book Characters, Emotion and Viewpoint? I read something like that there, and scanned in the pages and sent them to people - though of course now I can't remember who.

But that's what really finally drove home deep POV for me too. I still have those pages if anyone else wants it. (it's like half a chapter, complete with diagrams on POV "depth penetration" - seriously. I couldn't make that)

Sabrina said...

hal - I'd love to take a look at those POV pages. That's one book I haven't checked out yet.

If you emailed me at srwpnh @ hotmail.com I would be grateful!

terrio said...

Since Deep POV gives me hives only slightly less than GMC, I'd be happy to see those pages.

Melissa said...

Hal, yes it is, Characters & Viewpoint, by Orson Scott Card, part of the Elements of Fiction Writing Series. I bet you did like the charts. :) I liked that it didn't say you had to have a deep POV all the way through and could step back, in fact should step back or risk annoying or exhausting the reader. I don't think this book got into picking whose POV we should be as much as the title suggests, but I love studying the characterization. I think that comes first so maybe the POV mastery is a byproduct. :)

Hellie said...

Marnee, I have to find that joke. I've been googling for it and I can't find it. *pouts* That looks hilarious!!!!

hal said...

Sabrina and Ter - it's on its way. If anybody else wants it, just let me know!

hal said...

Yeah, that joke sounds perfect. I love it. And it's pathetic how true it is :)

Janga said...

I'm working on POV in revisions now and struggling.

Does it bother you when a writer uses multiple (as opposed to only H/H) POV?

hal said...

extra POV's don't bother me, as long as I know the h/h well. If I feel like an author is cheating and using secondary character's POV in place of a deep POV of the h/h, then I get annoyed. I'm not sure if that makes sense or not.

Janga said...

Off Topic and Shameless Friend Promotion: Lindsey Faber was just named Managing Editor at Samhain. We're celebrating at Romance Vagabonds today. Drop by and congratulate Linds.

http://www.romancevagabonds.com/

terrio said...

I squee'd earlier but I can squee again. LOL! SQUEEEEEEEE for Lindsey!!!

Now, to the secondary POV. I think there are times when things need to be revealed to the reader or even to the main characters and can only happen through the eyes of a secondary character.

For example, the way SEP used Winnie's daughter in Ain't She Sweet. Many of the connections between the characters ran through this young girl. And most of the back story, the bad stuff that went down between all these people, happened when they were her age or only slightly older. Using this secondary character's POV was genius, I thought.

But, and there's always a "but", if it's not established pretty early on that we're going to get a secondary character POV and it shows up out of no where later in the book, I'm jarred by it. Thoughout the Duchess books from Eloisa James, we read snippets in Villier's POV. It happens early on in the series and so it's not jarring as it happens throughout the books.

I guess I'm saying, make up your mind early if you're going to do it and make it an integral part of the book, not one drop in scene to serve one purpose.

All conjection on my part, of course.

terrio said...

Hal - I've only read a tiny portion of what you sent me and already see what I never understood before about deep POV. I could kiss you!

(Not happy about how much work it will take to fix what I already have, but it'll be better for it in the long run.)

hal said...

smooches :)

Melissa said...

Janga says, Does it bother you when a writer uses multiple (as opposed to only H/H) POV?

I agree with Hal. :) And I think, from personal experience pitching a novel where editors thought I had too many secondary characters (which I did go into their POV with), that it's tricky. However, rules can be broken if there's a good reason. :)

I think it falls under Helli's snippet: "don't bore, don't confuse, don't distract." Yes, there have been times when the writer has annoyed me with getting into the POV of secondary characters and it's usually because of the "meanwhile back at the ranch" thing where I can't remember where we left the hero and heroine. It could do more damage than good to go outside of their heads.

The key is moderation? I love it when there are small scenes from a villain's POV or something that the hero or heroine can't know about but we, as the reader know and it adds suspense.

In my case, I excused my extra dives into secondary character POV's because I was "world building." But I did get chastised for it not being a "romance" since it didn't keep the focus on solely the hero and heroine.

Melissa said...

I also love Terri's point that it can be jarring to go into a secondary character's POV if it seems to come out of nowhere.

terrio said...

I think that was supposed to be "conjectURE on my part." LOL! I'm now hearing that Electric Company song...conjunction junction, what's your function?

Melissa said...

Sorry to go off topic, but have to say, this week has been so helpful to me; mottos, thinking about about how romance novels are changing, alphas, and now POV. Am I writing? Um, not so much, but I'm plotting. :) Lots of notes and ideas on where to put this and that. It's like binging on craft books but much more fun.

I did read once that Teresa Medeiros (one of my favorites) writes without an internet connection and I know I need to do that sometimes. But I think we do need to refuel sometimes. There is so much to feel guilty about when it comes to how we spend our time, isn't there?

Hellie said...

The key is moderation?

The key is having such great characters, such a compelling voice (PASSION for the story), that readers don't give a crap because they're so entertained by the story.

You can tell ANY story if you have compelling characters and a compelling voice.

You can pick up any of your favorite books and find a dozen rules that author broke--but it didn't bother you. You're not going to write the author and go, "When you use if-then clauses, you need to use the word were" or "you never describe the character's house" or "your H/H didn't meet until page 50, you can't do that."

Great books always break the rules. They just do it in such a way that we gladly forgive them for the travesty.

terrio said...

I'm guessing Teresa Medeiros has broken that rule based on her Tweet proliferation.

Hellie is right. And Melissa, I'm so glad you get so much out of hanging out on this ship. Someone should get something other than rickets and alcohol poisoning.

terrio said...

I'm taking some shore leave for a while. I'll be on the road the rest of today and all day tomorrow. Try not to have too much fun without me (but since the weekend started yesterday, I'm not holding my breath.)

Melissa said...

Terri, I guess I didn't know about the Tweet proliferation! Okay, so she comes out of a cave sometimes too. :)

Helli, breaking rules is the pirate way right? :) Great books do break the rules.

2nd Chance said...

Janga - I just finished a book by Susan Wittig Albert where she switched POV with different chapters. Normally, her China Bayles series is all in first person, China, POV. This time she switched in some husband POV and it jarred. She explained in a preface that to bring the story together, she needed to do this. But it really jarred. China's voice is so pervasive that I kept reading the DH's stuff and hearing China. Good story, but I had to fight my way through the switching POV stuff.

2nd Chance said...

Hal - I'd love ta see the deep POV stuff ya have. Especially the "deep penetration" sections... ;)

2nd Chance said...

Terrio - Over using "just" will make me Bill Gates? Just how does this work? I just would love ta be Bill Gates. Just because of his money though, I'm just not cut out to be a programmer...

2nd Chance said...

Wow, I killed the blog...

Bad pirate! Bad, bad pirate!

J Perry Stone said...

First of all, Marnee, I'm so sorry you've been dealing with this.

This summer has been pretty shitastic for a lot of us. I hope for your sake and your family's, the bad karma burned the hell out. :)

As far as your excerpt is concerned, I think your POV choice is perfect. Fabulous writing, btw. You're amazing.

As for how I decide on POV, I go with the most important voice--the one who has the most to loose. For my first sex scene in my present book, for example, it's in my heroine's POV. She despises the fact that she loves my hero and in the that scene, I have her find a certain sexual power that makes it okay for her to open herself up to him in that way.

Hellie said...

I've been on shore leave, getting lunch with other Captains. Then I got back to work and had to write a scatching email to a person who spelled my name wrong. Either call me by my designated nickname or spell my legal name correctly. And if you can't figure how how to spell it correctly, LOOK AT THE EMAIL ADDRESS YOU'RE SENDING IT TO BECAUSE IT SPELLS IT OUT THERE.

Never mind the traffic driving back to the office. The Captain who was riding with me said, "Please don't hit the pedestrians. I do not want to be a witness and I don't want to have to tell the police you hit them in a fit of rage." Then get out of the road. I hate my downtown. Why do they refuse to put green arrows for turns? And why was there like a 100 cars oncoming? Isn't anyone at work at 2 in the afternoon? This isn't that big a town. Ridiculous.

Hellie said...

Hal, I was about to ask you for the excerpt but then realized, "Hey, I have that writing book. Damn, I need to read it."

Hellie said...

By the way, I hate Twitter.

There, I said it.

hal said...

LOL Hellie. It's either the last or next-to-last chapter. There's big diagrams on "penetration depth". You can't miss is *g*

Hellie said...

There's DIAGRAMS? Awesome!

"What are you going to do tonight?"

"Study diagrams on how to achieve better depth penetration."

Sin said...

Hellie, I hate downtown too. I loathe when the students come back.

And I hate Twitter. I refuse to even log on there.

Sin said...

And I dare you to say that to Mattycakes tonight if you see him. He said he peeked in the girls locker room last night when you and Holly were sitting on the couches talking.

hal said...

Our students are moving in today. There are cops everywhere trying (not successfully) to direct traffic, and there's some sort of concert/orientation going on outside my window.

I already miss the quiet of summer.

Hellie said...

*rolls eyes* Yes, it's really peeking in. You know how they have the L-shape entry way and the couches are put there in the entry way--and can be seen by the outside world? That's exactly all he saw and when we called his bluff of "You want some company, ladies?", he bolted off. Please.

He also missed out on cupcakes last night.

Renee said...

Hugs on all the health issues. Since I've been back from D.C. there's been quite a few.

POV~ I once wrote a scene in every character's pov because it just wasn't coming out right. I had first written it in the villain's, then switched to the heroine's, then the hero. It took my five tries before I got it right.

2nd Chance said...

Wait...cupcakes!? Why the hell didn't you share wit' the ship!?

Marnee Jo said...

I'm sorry guys. I had to be gone this afternoon....

But thank you all for your kind thoughts. As JP says, it's been a shitastic summer. LOL!!

A few random comments....

Melissa - I'm so glad you're getting a lot from us this week. It may look like we slip and slide by the seat of our pants around here, but there's method to our madness.

No, seriously....

Janga - squee for Lindsey!

Ter/Hal/Sabrina - I have that book and it's fantastic. Worth the expenditure.

JP - thanks for your incredibly sweet thoughts. And thanks for the compliment on my writing. :)

I really like the whole, the most to lose thing. I hadn't really thought of it that way before, I don't think....

Irisheyes said...

Marnee - Really late here, but I just wanted to add my hugs and well wishes for your loved ones with cancer. I've been dealing with the same thing and it really sucks! Hang in there.

Also, awesome blog. I did what you did and changed the POV in one of my scenes and it jump started things for me. Very helpful and something to think about in the future. It's funny but I almost always think/write in the heroine's POV. Looks like it's time to change that up a bit.