Thursday, July 2, 2009

Paper Plates and Random Rhinestones

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



On the eve of America’s independence I pause to reflect on how blessed I am to be a part of this great country. Even in the midst of the economic turmoil of the past several months, there is no other land I would rather call my home. I become emotional when I hear the National Anthem, and I’ve been caught singing Lee Greenwood’s God Bless the USA at decimal levels only small rodents can decipher.

I’m a little patriotic.

I have more than one t-shirt with an American flag waving across the chest.

*Biting lip* One even has random rhinestones.

I display more than one flag on the Fourth of July, and I hang patriotic bunting across the entire length of my front porch.

 If you come to my Fourth of July barbeque, you will find a buffet of corn on the cob, barbequed ribs, and watermelon. You can even drown your sorrows in sweet tea, if it’s your poison. You can chat with the family while relaxing in a variety of rocking chairs around the pool, but if  idle rest is your cup of tea, I have overstuffed patio furniture with ottomans to rest your feet. If you enjoy whiling the time away playing mindless games, my DH will be glad to challenge you with his corn hole expertise. For those of you not familiar with the game, you throw beanbags at a hole in the top of a slanted box. I know this scenario has most of you scrambling for your frequent flyer miles to book a trip to Ohio, but hold on Nellie, I’m just grazing the appetizer on this virtual playground.

You might have noticed the patriotically clad pool boys on the perimeter of my blog. Believe me when I say, they have more talent than just handing out beach towels. Besides wearing a flag well; they are highly educated in the art of massage. After they rub you into a noodle stupor, they will pour you into the chair of your choice (with the understanding  that you copping a feel is expected).  When the sun goes down, they can light up the sky with a variety of fireworks for your visual and auditory entertainment. No worries about pyrotechnics being illegal in the state of Ohio, the sheriff lives down the street and he indulges in his own pyrotechnic display. If mosquitoes become a problem, the pool boys wear a tool belt fully equipped with bug spray, condoms, and drool wipes. Okay, so maybe these exact pool boys won't be present, but my brother Randy did some push ups last week, and he carries himself well. He has mad skills at wielding a lighter. Last Fourth of July, he simultaneously ignited a bottle rocket,  a citronella candle, and a marshmallow. We 're thinking about entering him in the next America's Got Talent

When the festivities become too exciting, you are welcome to retire indoors to watch Dateline NBC with the grandmas. They can give you the latest on Michael Jackson’s demise, and tell you anything you need to know about preserving leftovers. Don't ask questions if you find them washing the paper plates.

If you can’t be enticed by the fantabulous agenda for the Russell Fourth of July shindig, enjoy your own celebration, and do it safely!
What are your Holiday plans? Are you a little patriotic, and does the thought of random rhinestones excite you?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

21 comments:

2nd Chance said...

Whoohoo! Wish I could come ta yer cabana fer the festivities! Nope, I will be gettin' me hair colored so I won't look all wan and gray in DC. While my DH will be watchin' grand prix motorcycle racers compete for pole position at Laguna Seca Raceway...

OK, we'll likely be tagether come the evenin'...when I'm thinkin' pizza and movie. Fireworks scare me a bit; large, rollin' acres of dry grass and assorted brush, lined by flammable eucalyptus trees, at my property line. Tend ta keep an eye on over there on the eve of the Fourth...

I'm not a big flag waver...but 'ave been known ta get a bit sparkly eyed when the anthem is sung at NASCAR...but I'll deny it if'n teased 'bout it.

PJ said...

I'm right there with you, Lisa. I fly the flag every day and add lots decorations to the house for the 4th. I get emotional when the National Anthem is played and cry at every single military flyover. My late dh was career military and patriotism has always been strong in our home.

Having visited many countries from an early age, I have always been aware of how fortunate I am to live in the USA. It's a privilege I never take for granted.

I have a busy holiday planned with a neighborhood cookout at the pool in the afternoon, an evening cookout at a friend's house and fireworks over the lake.

Wishing everyone a very safe and fun holiday!

Maggie Robinson/Margaret Rowe said...

People look at me funny because I'm still one of the few who sing 'The Star-Spangled Banner' at basketball games. When I grew up, that's what you did, difficult notes and all (which make me choke up). No hand over heart stuff---don't know when that became de rigeuer and find it funny that politiicans get criticized for not covering their hearts---that was for the Pledge of Allegiance, which is still recited every single morning in the high school I work at. Patriotism is easy to 'show off' with flag pins and gestures, but much harder to live to the letter.

We'll be having a quiet barbecue, as quiet as it can be with an almost-two-year-old spending a sleepover weekend at Mimi and Poppa's. :)

Happy Independence Day!

Marnee Jo said...

Everyone's plans sound great! Illegal pyrotechnics, hair dye, and off-key singing. I couldn't ask for more.

We've got a barbeque tonight, one tomorrow, and then Sunday I'm hosting a friend who's birthday is July 4th. Our family barbeque is tomorrow so we can't be with him, so we're going to party together on Sunday.

I'll probably be all barbequed out by Monday. And gain five lbs.

Oh well, what's patriotism without fatty barbeque food and extra weight gain?

Have a wonderful weekend everyone! And be safe on the roads if you're going anywhere.

Lisa said...

Chance, Happy dye job, and what's your favorite pizza toppings?

I would say fireworks aren't a good idea in southern Cali.

Lisa said...

PJ, I salute all military personel past and present for the tremendous sacrifices they and their famillies endure for all of us.

It sounds like you have a wonderful celebration lined up. Fireworks over a lake sounds spectacular.

Enjoy!

Lisa said...

Maggie,

I don't do hand-over-heart either. I do for the Plege of Alligience. I've often wondered the same thing about the abuse poloticians recieve. I guess the critics learned different ettique.

I totally agree with you, patriotism is instilled in an individual. Maybe it's not so much about the rhinestones, but what lies beneath:)

Enjoy that sleepover!

Lisa said...

Marnee,

All holidays cause weight gain at my house. It's tradition. Wow, you have a full holiday agenda. Hope you enjoy every minute. And a Fourth of July birthday is too sweet:)

Sin said...

God Bless America!

Especially with the flag wrapped around that. Woo!

My parents host a huge party every year. My dad loves to blow shit up. We used to have the parties at the Lake of the Ozarks but it's been years since they've kept a cabin down there. Now, we all get together, eat a bunch of food and homemade ice cream and blow things up until midnight.

Have a good Independence Day everyone! I have to get to cleanin' and cookin' and getting ready for the fourth!

2nd Chance said...

Yer forgiven fer sayin' I live in SoCal...ya didn't know... I be more in the Northern Half a' the state... But fireworks here still be a danger. Last summer, we spent too many weeks fightin' fires set by dry lightning... Not a week went by when I couldn't see smoke billowin' up from the north, or the south or the east. (No west as that is the Pacific Ocean...)

So, I be a bit nervous 'bout fireworks...

If'n I had a party ta go ta, I'd go. But pizza will do... Pepperoni, pineapple and extra sauce...thin crust, light on the cheese...

What da you like?

Lisa said...

Sin, Yes! blowing shit up is definately on the agenda:)

Have a safe one, and try not to catch the kitchen on fire while cooking:)

Chance, Sorry! I have a friend in southern Cali, so I must have been thinking of her:)The fires are so bad in California, I cringe whenever I see the news and another one is raging.

I like just about anything on a pizza but anchovies. My fav is mushrooms, onions, and pepperoni. We also have a restuarant that has specialty pizza. I always get the one with sweet sauerkraut and onions:)

terrio said...

Since I have no plans I was going to say I'd join Chance for that pizza, but then I read her toppings. LOL! If I go, I'll bring my own.

I've always felt VERY lucky to have been born here. It really is the luck of the draw if you think about it. Hearing the National Anthem at a ball game or big gathering is moving, but living in a military town ups that by about a hundred. You know if you're at a ball game here, you're likely sitting next to someone who has put him or herself in the line of fire for you. It makes it so real.

As I say, no plans for me. I do need to hit the mall a bit today and then I'll do some cleaning and lots of writing. Hope everyone has a fun and safe holiday!

Oh, and those are some awesome cabana boys. Nice.

Irisheyes said...

Awesome blog, Lisa! Sounds like a great 4th at your house!

We go to my brother's house and spend the day. We've been doing it since my daughter was born (about 14 years). They live in a small town with a parade down Main Street in the afternoon and fireworks at the H.S. at night. In between we go to his house for BBQ, swimming, Bacci Ball, and Bags (what you call your corn hole game).

We never did anything when I was a kid. We watched all the neighborhood kids go off to grandma and grandpa's or get fireworks to blow off in their front yard. I'm so glad we started this tradition with my brothers and sisters. My family looks forward to the 4th with as much enthusiasm as they do Christmas. It's become one of our favorite traditions as a family.

Lisa said...

Terrio,

Write on, and finish that WIP!


Glad you can appreciate the Fourth of July eye candy:)

Lisa said...

Janga,

Isn't family traditions the best? Enjoy your family and have a safe holiday:)

Lisa said...

Sorry Irish, Janga must be in my thoughts:)

Janga said...

Thanks for thinking of me, Lisa. :)

My fourth is going to be relatively quiet. I'm going to some friends' house for dinner. We've all reached the age where an air-conditioned, insect-free evening is preferable to cookouts. They live close enough to a park that has a big fireworks display that we'll be able to watch the show from their backyard--all the beauty without the crowd.

I hope all of you have a happy and safe fourth.

2nd Chance said...

Yer forgiven, Lisa. Can't 'elp when ya don't know what a deadly insult 'tis when ya place a NoCaler inta SoCaler territory... The fire danger be real this year...we all be crossin' our fingers tomorra goes off without the sounds a' sirens...

Sorry, Terrio! I know me pizza toppin's ain't the norm.. I just like the bite a pepperoni 'gainst the sweetness a' pineapple...and the added tartness a' good sauce...

Saur---uh...sourcr...saurkraut? Uh, however ya spell it, and sweet onions don't sound all that bad!

Hellie said...

Damn, girl, I wish I was there to celebrate the 4th with you. I know it would be an absolute hoot. You had me at the beanbag toss.

But the men wrapped in flags and the grandmas washing paper plates would be worth the trip as well.

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!

Hellie said...

I'm sorry, Second, but I think I'm going to have to side with Terri's pizza. But enjoy your pizza! That's why it's so great to be an American! You can have your pizza any ole damn way you please!

2nd Chance said...

Aye, thank all the powers that be, we can enjoy Italian/American pizza with German or Polynesian or whatever toppin's we want!

Isn't this country great! :)