Sunday, March 13, 2011

In the Beginning Again

Reading: What I Did For a Duke

Just Read: An Unlikely Countess (5 stars, the hero is dreamy, realistic but romantic)

Raving about: Hush, Hush (Becca Fitzpatrick, YA, 5 stars, so delicious, perfect HEA)

 

If you’ve been writing for more than five minutes, you’ve probably stumbled across the concept of “beats” which to me are much like the steps found in the hero’s journey (Vogler). Of course, if you’ve ever read Vogler’s hero’s journey, you can get disheartened pretty quickly because many of the steps don’t seem to have anything with the romantic journey at all.

 

This is where Billy Mernit steps in and helps you out. He wrote a book called Writing the Romantic Comedy, which for obvious reasons I bought long ago. Granted it’s a screenwriting book, but it can still be useful to you in novel writing. There are still beats in novels, things that we all expect to happen.

 

And most blessed of all, Billy only requires 7 beats and not the 12 or so that I think make up the hero’s journey. Thank you, Billy!

 

The first beat: “The Chemical Equation”, Setup. This is the same as Vogler’s—the original world. We meet the characters for the first time and we find out what is wrong with the picture. What is missing in the character’s lives? And it’s not the external problem that’s missing, but the internal problem—the emotional. It’s important because you need your readers to bond with your main character. (Billy makes a really good explanation about this--so if you can get your hands on this book, I recommend it.)

 

Many times your character might be involved in something the reader won’t approve of or is doing something that makes her rather unlikable, but because you set up this emotional setup, revealing what is missing, the reader keeps turning the page to find out how the character is going to find what she is missing.

 

Then you do a similar setup for the hero. You reveal to the reader what the hero is missing, his emotional internal problem. And when you do this, you end up showing how both of these characters are going to complete each other. This is the part where you make a promise to your reader that these people are meant for each other, even if it’s going to take them another 300 pages to figure it out.

 

It’s a lot to promise—and it is why beginnings are so important and get rewritten a score of times. We writers are coached so often about making the beginning a big enough HOOK and start with the action, and all those important things that beginnings also need. But when you’re creating your hook and your action (the external problem in crisis), don’t forget to define what the characters’ emotional/internal crisis are. The action and external problems are why readers keep turning pages, but it’s the emotional crisis why they all picked up the book in the first place. We all want the emotional connection.

 

Let’s see if I can do it for the book I’m reading: What I Did For a Duke. (I’ll give everyone a moment to stop gaping at the screen.) Although I’m not a fan of dukes, I do have to applaud Julie Anne Long for her opening hook. I didn’t think I’d enjoy it; it was a hook I’d seen before—but then it got real interesting. Not only was the adulterating couple caught by the hero (his fiancée with a young rogue), when the rogue asked the duke what he was going to do, the hero says, “Very well, we’ll just share her” and proceeds to act like he’s going to have a threesome with them. Quite clever, JAL. Very smart hook, and definitely starting things off with a bang to see how everything is resolved.

 

But did I figure out what the hero was missing? Yes, yes, I did. The hero has a little talk with his soon to be ex-fiancée and she explains why she chose the rogue. “You’re unlikable.” Which is a dart apparently. The duke can’t deny he’s not likable; and it’s revealed that he uses his unlikablity to keep others at a distance. Yet at the end of the chapter, you can tell this quality of himself bothers him. As a reader, you feel immediate empathy for him--we all want to be liked; and as a reader, I can immediately guess why he's not likable. He’s a duke. He’s used to fawning and fake people. He’s a celebrity of sorts, and as such, you never really know who are your real friends and who are only being friendly to get things from you. After so many years of proof, now he’s just resigned to not being liked for himself. He doesn’t feel that will ever change. His internal yearning is that he wants to be liked for himself.

 

And this is very much at odds with his external goal: revenge. He’s going to punish that rogue; and he’s going to do it by seducing his sister. Hardly the actions of someone who wants to be liked, eh? Talk about shooting yourself in the foot, but one can’t let something like that pass by. As a reader, I can’t blame him for wanting revenge. In fact, when I first see him again, putting the events in motion, I can only applaud him. He’s hysterical. He’s Alan Rickman at his unflappable, sardonic best.

 

I looked for the heroine’s internal yearning. She’s in love with a cousin, who turns out to be in love with another cousin instead. Heartbreak. So is her internal yearning for relief from her heartbreak or for her true love? I’m not sure which it is. I’m too interested in the hero to give it much thought. This story belongs more to the hero, and the heroine, although burdened by her own problems, is along for this ride.

 

So that’s a lot to expect from a beginning, isn’t it? A Hook, Action, and a What’s Missing From This Picture for the hero and heroine. Are you able to define yours in your story, or have you read anything lately that you’re able to define these things? And if you want to ignore my shop talk, you can just talk about what awesome books you’ve read lately.

42 comments:

2nd Chance said...

I might be able to figure this out give a few days, but off the top of my head? Not a chance!

I'm doing the light reading at the moment. "Shot Through Velvet" by Ellen Byerrum...a light-hearted mystery. Lots of fun, with the Lacey Smithsonian an her Fashion Clue hook. Really witty writing!

Since so much of RT is screenwriting involved, I'll look for this book your writing of...sounds really good!

Marnee said...

Wow, Cap'n! Great blog. Super informative and useful, I think.

I'll give this a try. Hook, action, and what's missing from each person.

My hero just inherited a title. Problem is, the rest of his family has mucked up the reputation to go with it. Cousin, hanged for treason a decade ago. Uncle just killed himself. But, the silver lining is that he's been told his cousin might have been innocent. And that the vicar's estranged daughter might know what happened.

But when my hero tracks down the heroine, she's made her way to London and has become a prostitute. But she doesn't want to help him. And then someone tries to kill him.

So, that's my hook and starting action.

What's my hero missing? My hero is a failure. Thanks to physical abuse as a child--and being told he's worthless his whole life--it's become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Business ventures, relationships, etc. He sees this title as his ticket to easy street.

My heroine? She's spent the last ten years feeling like she's been in pergatory. She fell in love with my hero's cousin, the one who was hanged, and got pregnant with his kid. After he was hanged, she was left pregnant and ruined. She think that her life has been destroyed because she listened to her heart instead of her head.

Hellion said...

Chance, I don't think it's always something you figure out right away with characters. I think it is a lot easier to come up with action and a hook than it is to identify right off what the characters are missing. I think we're so ingrained to make sure there is enough conflict (and outer goals/action) that we end up having to shelve the internal stuff for the first round. It's a lot to juggle. I'm sure this is why rewriting is so important. Sometimes I think figuring out what the inner journey was is the purpose of the rewrite--once you get to the end of your draft and know your characters better, you can say what it is they were missing.

But it's not always that way. Sometimes writers know what the internal is but not necessarily what the outer problem is.

Hellion said...

Great summary, Marn--exactly--Hook, Action, and the Missings. Which is a lot more interesting than my long ass blog.

Can you believe I had planned to write about all 7 beats at once? Everyone would have been reading until Tuesday to get through it. Ugh.

So you're writing a light romantic comedy, are you? (Totally kidding.) It sounds very promising--and definitely one of those REDEMPTION themes that I adore. What I really like about your characters is that they clearly have so much in common, but I think they also complement each other. They need each other. I think it will be one of those heart-wrenching stories that everyone sighs over. :) Including me.

Donna said...

Great post, Hellion. I agree that the emotional internal problems are so important, because that's the part that will be changing throughout the story. I like it even better when the characters aren't really aware of what's missing, or when they think that missing portion means one thing, but there's a deeper meaning they learn later.

Lots of good stuff here to ponder. :)

Marnee said...

I hope so, Hells. It's be percolating so long, I'm not sure anymore. :) Definitely not a light romantic comedy, but I think it's still got my voice in it. (Ie, I'm a bit goofy, so it's bound to have some of that, somewhere).

I definitely think breaking them up is a good idea. You know we can't handle too much at once.

Hellion said...

Exactly, Donna, the character doesn't exactly realize something is missing for them--but the reader does. So as the writer, you eventually have to know what's missing. *LOL*

I love the emotional part. It's like the earthquake stuff that happens under the surface; you can't see it, can't really predict it--but it's the cause of all the destruction on the surface. Until you identify the epicenter, you can't really get a handle on how to fix anything. Sorta.

I have Japan on my mind this morning. Sorry.

Hellion said...

Marn, I think percolating is okay. You're still working out the kinks. I think if you started it, abandoned, and are now picking it up again, you'll run into bigger problems. And I only say that because I've done it and my CPs actually identified the spot where I started writing again. It's amazing how much as even 6 months can change your writing and make it evident you didn't write it from beginning to end.

There is something to be said for Christina Dodd's advice about writing fast. *LOL*

Bosun said...

I so need this right now. The real plotting on the new WIP starts this week (now that the query might be done - yay!) and this is good stuff to keep in mind. I think Crusie is the best at creating opening scenes that give all of this, but without a ton of introspection and still lots of action. So much is revealed through her dialogue and maybe one line of introspection that follows.

The first scene in MAYBE THIS TIME is a prime example, but so is the opening scene in BET ME.

I know my opening scene, but I have a question. This book is really going to belong to the hero, though the heroine goes through a good bit of change too. But mostly, it's his story. Does that mean the book should open in his POV, or can it open in hers?

I'm thinking the readers sort of latch on more to the character whose POV they get first.

Hellion said...

I’m thinking the readers sort of latch on more to the character whose POV they get first.

I believe this is true, but after all we know about exceptions to the rule, I guess it's best to say "It's not absolute you must start with the POV of the character who changes most." After all, there are books that start with the villains POV and the book definitely doesn't belong to them. *LOL*

All I would say is start with the POV you want to now because your beginning is going to change anyway and you may end up with something else entirely. Just start where it feels natural now so you don't stunt yourself with writing.

Bosun said...

Okay, then I have another question. LOL! Are we talking opening scene or opening chapter? (I know, anal.) The real conflict of why my H/H absolutely can't be together will be revealed in the first chapter, but not the opening scene. Sort of the second scene.

It's a doozy, so I think it can wait that long, but it's my hook and it won't be in the first five pages.

Hellion said...

Neither, necessarily. When I was referencing What I Did For a Duke, the information I gleened about this first beat took place over two chapters and about 3 scenes at least. I think a beat might be larger than we think, or it could be a scene or even a paragraph that defines what needs to happen for the emotional arc of the story. That's what it feels like these 7 beats are doing--they're the emotional arc for the romantic comedy (though I think it can be tailored to just romance if needed).

Bosun said...

Cool, I'm feeling better then.

Okay, so hook, action, and what they're missing.

Hook - Heroine is engaged to hero's brother.
Action - This is harder. I'd say it's the hero going out of his way to help people. He's a giver by nature and keeps ending up with people who always take and never give back. So he's sort of convinced himself not to help anyone anymore. And then he keeps helping people. (Stops and helps the heroine with a flat tire - doesn't know who she is or that she's his brother's fiance.)

What the hero is missing - Someone to give back. Someone who doesn't throw his generosity, and ultimately his love, back at him. Or throw him away, more like.

What the heroine is missing - Someone to give her a voice. She needs empowered big time. Someone who will listen to her, be interested in what she thinks and doesnt' do the thinking for her.

Hellion said...

What I mean is that your beginning starts with action, like we're always nagged about. So however you start your beginning, make sure it's active in some way. Something big is going down or your voice is active--something. Active.

In WIDFAD, the action starts (in the POV of a secondary character mind you) with a guy crawling in the window of the duke's fiancee. He crawls in bed with her and suddenly you hear a gun click. (I'd say that's a hook. *LOL*) Then a light is on and the duke is talking to them real calmly, and they're freaking out because they're both starkers, and the duke explains he set the guy's horse free and the other guy says, "This isn't what it seems." *LOL* When the duke offers to share the fiancee and makes to crawl in bed with them, that's a sort of hook for me too, because it told me this isn't your normal stuffy duke. *LOL* And I knew I was going to enjoy hanging out with this guy because he has every right to be pissed--and he is--but he's still going to have a little fun with it. *LOL*

That's what I thought the hook was--it was the thing that happened in the novel that decided my commitment to finish the novel.

Bosun said...

And I've totally taken over the blog. Sorry! I'll shut up. LOL!

Bosun said...

That's why I think I need to open in her POV, but that could change. The first scene is the flat tire scene and if she's driving along and then BOOM, tire goes, she's stranded. Lower Outer Banks, no cell signal. Can't decide what to do. (No decision making skills at this point, but not panicking either.)

The hero stops to help, he's really cute, she's attracted, tells him her name but not exactly, let's him know where she's going but not why, hints maybe they'll run into each other (it's where he lives.)

If I open in his POV, he's driving down the road thinking. No action there. But I could use his POV, make the action come first, then him thinking as he's driving away. Or rather, her thinking as she drives down to the ferry.

Either way, the next part is him walking into the house to meet his brother's fiance and BOOM, there she is.

Now that I'm writing this out, it's quite boring. Huh.

Hellion said...

Am I the only one who was startled that she's flirting when she's engaged? I hope she feels guilty about it. (My puritanism is showing.)

Bosun said...

I did NOT use the word flirting. Technically, he says "Maybe we'll run into each other" and she just doesn't say they better not. There's a connection, but it's not the batting her eyelashes "Isn't he a hottie" Paris Hilton kind of thing.

Just a connection.

Hellion said...

HINTING they might run into each other again sounds like flirting.

Bosun said...

I know, I wrote that wrong in the first comment. She's not exactly encouraging, just not sharing her "spoken for" circumstances.

Bosun said...

To be fair, I haven't written a word of this, so it's all subject to change. :)

2nd Chance said...

Firstly, I don't think you have to open with the POV of either the H or H! Open with a way to bring them into things. I know I fly in the face of the 'shoulds' when I say that, but I flirt all over the bloody place when it comes to openings. Open so the book is interesting, I don't care whose POV it is.

Secondly, ok, she isn't flirting, but you said she already has confidence problems. I'd say Hel is right, she needs to feel guilty over thinking this guy is really a hottie. Especially if she has even a fleeting thought of, "Gee, I wonder if Gary would stop and help out a stranger on a cold, wet, rainy, miserable night...?" Or whatever.

I think it would be more interesting from his POV as he's chiding himself for doing it again, the knight errand thing. And now he'll be late to his brother's welcome home and arrive all wet and what an idiot...etc.

Okay, let's see if I can do this for the third kraken's Caribbean book... Hook, Janey is never at a loss for words, until she meets Nathan (or Sebastian, or Batholomew or whatever name I settle on) and suddenly, she is tongue tied. At least she can talk to his son, a little boy who barely remembers his mother.

What is she missing? Someone to call her own and a reason to feel comfortable with silence.

(See, I suck at this.)

What is he missing? Permission to love again without feeling like he's betrayed his dead wife.

Hey, it's an adventure, they figure it all out while battling evil...

Bosun said...

Just made a trip to Target and along the way, got a much better idea for the opening scene. Flat tire is out. Flirting is out. Contact and connection remain, AND plenty of opportunity to add humor.

Yes, this will be much better. And in his POV. :)

Chance - You fly in the face of the "shoulds", I'll stay here on solid ground. But thanks. LOL! And I though you were going with Nicholas?!

2nd Chance said...

See, I knew I had another name I was flirting with! ;-) Though I might change the little boys name to Nicholas and then Janey can drive his dad crazy and call him Nicky...

Bosun said...

Then you're still stuck with Mick and Nick in the same series.

2nd Chance said...

Yeah, but one is a little boy and everyone will call him Nicky...no one calls Mick Micky... ;-) And Mick is out of the story in book number three...

I just read the name Mordecai in a book and thought... "Now, that's a name you don't hear often! Wonder if it could be a hero's name?"

Does Mordecai have a knickname? ;-)

Bosun said...

My guess would be Cai pronounced Ky (long "i" sound).

2nd Chance said...

Is Kyle shortened from Mordecai? I sorta like that name...

Hellion said...

I like the name Mordecai. It does sound heroic.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mordecai

I like the confliction on the name meaning. *LOL*

What's Mordecai's last name? Or you could also call him "M".

2nd Chance said...

Why, it's Silvestri! He's Alan's great nephew...

Hellion said...

So calling him by his last name is out. Got it. *LOL*

I like the names where they twist the name for another word as a nickname. Like instead of calling him Mordecai or Cai/Ky--they'd call him "Murder" to reinforce how tough he is. Assuming he's tough obviously. But the heroine would call him something else. Who wants to call their beloved murder?

Hellion said...

*gimlet eye* He's not a PIRATE?

2nd Chance said...

If he were a pirate, that might be good. But he's a brewmaster...haven't decided of exactly what. Rum is a given, maybe ale and mead...

2nd Chance said...

Hey! Not everyone is a pirate! His heroine is! Good enough?

Bosun said...

LOL! One pirate in the pair seems good enough. I don't think Kyle is short for anything. And it doesn't really fit your kind of story, at least not in my head.

2nd Chance said...

Might be good for him to have a name she can't give a turn into a nickname... Keeps it a bit formal. Maybe at the end when they are chatting about a label for his rum...it could be Mordecai's Murder...

Bosun said...

You should turn it around to Red Rum and give it a Shining twist. :)

2nd Chance said...

Oooh! Shades of the Overlook!

Maybe the sun will turn his son's hair red and he'll do something with that twist...

Gee, I'm sitting with a window behind me and it's highlighting how dirty my monitor screen is. Wow, I need to clean this sucker!

Marnee said...

Wait, I read through here and got lost at Mordecai. Did I miss something?

Ter, so she's engaged to his brother and this is the first time they're meeting?

But I'm not having a problem with the whole engaged woman and her guilt for thinking a guy's hot. She can think someone's hot in her head. And I don't mind the engaged woman who gets unengaged in the course of a story either.

Bosun said...

Family lives on a remote island at the bottom of the Outer Banks. Bro lives in Richmond. Rarely comes home. Been with heroine about 8 months and now they are getting married, so he's bringing her home to meet the family.

Yep, first time hero is meeting her. The good news is, Bro will get his own heroine later.

Marnee said...

I like these sorts of stories. It's got to be done right (what with the making her look like a witch for cheating on the brother) but if it's done well, it can be such interesting reading. :)

Bosun said...

Just like in the book I just finished, it's going to take a long time before the H/H actually consumate the cheating. Almost to the end. It's just emotional cheating up to that point, but it's more the heroine finding herself and her voice, and falling in love with the hero who helps her get there.

They fight it, if that helps. I'm choosing to ignore the fine line I'll have to walk. This kind of story should probably be handled by a more skilled writer, but these characters showed up in MY head. LOL!