Thursday, July 22, 2010

Reading Aloud

OK, I’d never done this before. I don’t have kids and reading something aloud to your dogs just doesn’t really seem sane. And although that generally doesn’t really concern me…well, it just never happened.

I did take drama in junior college and worked on dramatic readings of lines, etc. I was memorizing and watching myself in a mirror. I was never very good at it, but I tried to have fun and just enjoy the class and what it taught me about myself. Good teacher. So good, I took the follow up classes. Just because I liked him.

No, not that way! He was a good instructor!

When I got my book back from my agent, with corrections to make, she warned me about overuse of pronouns and too much passive voice. Well, I thought…OK. What do I do about it? How do I find it and what the hell is it?

(Not pronouns, I do know that much. I have a degree in language and literature, you know.)

Yes, I did some reading about passive voice/active voice. Even read Dead Reckoning’s blog on show vs. tell, which she assured me is the same thing. I guess.

Yes, I’m in a lot of denial about this whole thing. But, Terri convinced me to read the book out loud and I’d hear what needed to be tweaked.

Really?

I mean, I kept reading about how this was a great technique. Most classes I took suggested it. I didn’t have anything against the idea…

I admit, I worried a bit about how foolish I’d feel. I have a very odd bit of self-consciousness that rears its ugly head at odd times. I mean, alone, in my house? Who cares?! Like Bonnie would care…



(She actually seemed to find it a bit entertaining. The cat? Totally uninterested. But that is cats.)

So, yes, I printed out the whole thing. My frugal, environmental self insisted we do it on the back of something I’d already printed, so I had to be careful to keep it all in order. And I sat down to read. I decided I’d try 5 chapters and see how it went.

Well, I went hoarse. Tea. That was the ticket. Some throat coat tea, lemon flavored. Used to turn the trick when I sang a lot. It helped. I wondered, how do moms manage the whole Harry Potter books without being constantly hoarse?

Terri said, “Don’t read it loud! Don’t shout!”

Well, hell…it’s dramatic! My inner thespian said read it with vigor! After the tea and a hydrating shower, I read another five chapters. That put me half way through the book! Cool! (Husband arrived home partway through. He later said he had the impression it was all about sex, all the time. Hee, hee.)

I found things to tweak. Especially repetitive words and places to replace pronouns. The passive/active stuff? I’m not sure. I worked at varying sentence form, untwisted a few twisty places. (I’m hell with keeping my timeline even, ask Terrio, she’ll tell you.)

I took the next morning and entered the corrections. And then tackled the second half of the book. This time, with a bottle of water at my side.

My eldest sister has often talked of reading Tarzan to her kids on long car trips. And Lord of the Rings… Did she ever lose her voice?

I’m lucky, I don’t need my voice for much during the day. But it has been decades since I’ve been this hoarse. Reminds me of rock concerts…but no ringing ears. Or high school football games…



But the cat still seemed bored.

OK. It was helpful. In fact, I think I’m going to try this with other books and see how much I find to clean up. A painter friend of mine spoke of how painters will look at their work in a mirror to see elements they miss with normal perspective. I assume this works in a similar fashion. A teacher friend of mine said reading aloud is a great teaching tool. Well, I learned new things!

I did find that Emily’s dialogue was a lot easier for me to read. But she’s a modern woman, not so unusual. It was harder with Alan. He speaks in a more formal manner, with the educated fashion of the era. (No, no extreme piratese for him.) I wondered if the difficulty meant it needed to be corrected, and decided against it. It reads fine. I think it’s just me.

I am an extremely informal woman with my speech; to twist it in a formal way was difficult. Not to mention all the cursing Emily erupts with when having sex… I write foul language, I seldom actually use it. While Emily has a foul mouth. She was a bartender…

So, anyone else ever played with this technique? I know Terrio has, she bragged about it. How does one do this without going hoarse? Any favorite remedies for a raw throat? Play with it. It is Friday and that means play. I dare ya, read a chapter of your stuff out loud. And let us know how it went for you!

78 comments:

Quantum said...

I use computer voices all the time for proof reading and it works brilliantly. I believe that on-line libraries eg Univ of Pensilvania ( http://www.digital.library.upenn.edu/books ) makes audio books with computer voices when readers are not available.

With your weird Pirate spelling, you might have to spend time with the pronunciation editor though, but its a one off. Lots of good voices are available now and you can choose male and female voices for reading the male and female parts.

The voices don't express emotion yet, though people are working on that. Curiously I find that an advantage, as after a while my brain interprets the computer voice, injecting the emotion that should be there.

If it works for you, it can be a fabulous tool!

Yo'Ho Riley said...

Hey Chance! I was looking the site up to add this to my fav blogging list for Savvy, and remembered it's your day to post anyway.

Have you tried whispering, or talking low? Maybe you wouldn't lose your voice. I don't know that you have to be all dramatic with it, and scare your pets. :) Love the pics though! lol!

I'm so proud of you! You go girl!

Donna said...

LOL, Chance -- show v. tell isn't the same as passive voice, but telling has a tendency to be passive, so I'm told. :)

I haven't read my books out loud -- I always feel that since they're meant to be read silently, that's how I should read it for editing/revising purposes. But since you were brave enough to give it a try, I promise I will too!

Does it count if I enlist one of the Hotties instead? LOL Actually, I could read the heroine's part, and they can take turns for the hero's role. . .

Indigo said...

Might help to do a read through on each chapter as you write it. (Hugs)Indigo

Marnee Jo said...

I haven't used the read aloud method a lot. I just did it for my first chapter a few weeks ago and I swear, I should have done it years ago. It gave me a better feel for the sound, took away what my brain thought it saw/heard.

I'd suggest whispering. As Ter said, it's not the volume that counts.

And as far as parents and reading goes, most kids don't have a super long attention span. Or maybe that's just my kid. :)

Bosun said...

I was not bragging. I was simply testifying that this works. And it did, so there. *blows raspberry*

Dialogue is people talking, so it makes sense that the best way to get it right it to "talk" it. You pick up patterns and inflections that add to it. Remember, these scenes are playing out in the reader's mind, make sure your play is staged well. That's all I'm sayin'...

Hellion said...

I haven't actually read my stuff aloud--not the whole thing--I've read pages aloud if I'm having difficulty with them sometimes, but not whole books or chapters. I don't like the sound of my voice so I can't concentrate on what is being read when I'm thinking, "My voice is hideous." It's a problem.

And I wouldn't let anyone else read it aloud.

I try to read it aloud in my head, like I'm hearing it, but I don't think that works as effectively.

In the meanwhile, it seems to be working for you: hydrate, hydrate, hydrate--and for God's sake, dial down the theatrics a few notches. Whispering is fine.

Sin said...

I hear if you read it aloud in front of the mirror it is supposed to help you find awkward sentencing and phrases that are unusual. I've not tried this. I mostly write, print out to edit, correct. I wasn't the greatest at grammar in high school and find myself trying to remember grammar rules while I'm in the car.

Don't ask me why. The car just inspires my mind to wander.

I'm kinda with Hellie on the whole reading aloud. While I don't think she has a hideous voice, my voice just isn't a voice that is meant to read aloud. Children's books... yes. I like to make the voices and scare the hell out of them. But reading my stuff aloud, no way. No amount of name calling and daring will make me do it.

Bosun said...

Great googily moogily, it's just talking. Y'all talk all day long to all sorts of people. There's nothing wrong with your voices (I've heard both of you so don't argue) and they are not awful. Not at all.

Donna said...

So do you think you find more things to change with the dialogue, or with the non-dialogue parts?

Bosun said...

I mostly catch the dialogue but also the "he said/she said" stuff. When to use a name to keep track of who is talking, when I've used it too much, and when I don't need any tag at all.

It's like writing a song. Even a book has a melody and flow, saying it out loud just helps me keep that melody right.

Hal said...

I find it helpful as well, though I've never done a whole book. Tea would be a must for me too. I'm with Terri on finding the rhythm and melody. For me, I can hear my voice In a way that I can't read it, so reading aloud/listening helps me figure out where I've captured it and where ive missed the mark.

2nd Chance said...

Q! I love it. I could cheat and let someone read it to me!

Frustrating to me inner thespian, but much easier on the vocal chords...

2nd Chance said...

Yo'Ho, thanks fer adding us ta yer favorites!

I'm not sure speaking softly would a' kept me voice from being strained. Let's face it, I don't have call ta use me voice a great deal on any given day, so 200 pages of reading aloud is bound to leave me with a dry throat.

Least I got enough water inta me those two days a reading aloud!

2nd Chance said...

Hmmmm...yer on ta a good idea there, Donnaroo! Ya could actually see how yer words translate ta actual action. Nothing passive 'bout doing that!

Bosun said...

I also do this as I'm writing. I've never sat down with and read the entire thing at one time. But after I write a scene, I'll go back and read it aloud. Working in chunks and making corrections then moving on seems to make sense.

2nd Chance said...

But I'd give it a try, Donna. Because ya do see things, simple things, that the eye just sort a' skips over. I think the brain knows what is supposed ta be there, so it almost substitutes what ya meant ta write. If'n ya read it...yer mouth don't know ta do that.

I caught a lot of things I wouldn'a without doin' this.

2nd Chance said...

Ah, Marn...so kids are like me cat? ;-)

I did try speaking lowish, but me acting class stepped in and I heard Mr. Ribeiro's voice, "Project!"

And I'd be off!

Julie said...

Chance, when I was teaching my youngest how to read, I had her read out loud to me … and our dog. Why the dog? Because the dog always had time to ‘listen”. So my youngster was able to get a lot of reading (out loud) time in that she might not have. Interestingly enough our English Springer Spaniel liked to be read to. Her favorite book was The White Stallion. Her least? A book that extolled the cleaverness of cats. Swear … as soon as my DD started to read the cat book, the dog would growl and stalk out of the room!

2nd Chance said...

Indigo! Welcome aboard, and yer right. I be inclined ta do this as I finish sections from now on. In fact, plan on reading what I got written fer me second Kraken book afore I continue wit' it!

A hugger! Hugs back at ya, darlin'!

2nd Chance said...

Bo'sun, did I say ya were bragging? Didn't mean ta, sweetums.

Funny thing? Weren't the dialogue that caught me up wit' where things were wrong...or twisted. Though I saw a few places ta add some modification of action.

2nd Chance said...

Hellion - Not sure I adore me own voice, particularly. And it were funny, ta realize how...shy I be at reading the cuss words and sex scenes. I surely ain't shy writing them!

2nd Chance said...

Really, Sin? No amount of name calling will see you do it?

I dare ya, Sin. I double dog dare ya! Three pages, just three pages...

Ya find that yer listening ta the words, ta the story, not yer voice...trust me!

2nd Chance said...

Bo'sun - Ya, Sin and Hel have jobs where they do talk ta folks all day.

Me? The barista takes me order... I chatter ta Bonnie some when we walk, might talk on the telephone ta the husband...

I don't have much call ta talk during me day...

Julie said...

I dare ya, read a chapter of your stuff out loud. And let us know how it went for you!

Ooooh Chance, I'm laughing so hard it hurts ... Anyone who knows me, knows that I'd rather "talk it" out instead of "write it" down!

2nd Chance said...

Donna - I found more with the non-dialogue, definately. Places in the narrative that stumbled. And as I said, I found places ta add action ta the dialogue, or break it up with somethin' happening as there be speachifyin'.

Like slamming a fist down on a table in the midst a' bellowin' ... that sorta thing.

I found repetitive words, where something was spoke and then the narrative used it too close in proximatee; wrong words, that spell check missed; framents that needed some beefing up. Hearing helped me figure out where to replace pronouns with names...things like that.

Donna said...

Maybe that's why I didn't want to read my stuff out loud -- I was tired of hearing my voice after talking all day long to customers and staff. LOL

Indigo -- welcome! Your website is lovely, and I'll definitely be checking it often. :)

Julie, I'm dying laughing about your dog not liking the cat book! LOL

2nd Chance said...

Bo'suns right, it be about the flow. When it went choppy, with dialogue or with narrative, I caught it.

2nd Chance said...

Yup, Hal...reading it aloud helped me hear me writing voice...and when it stumbled or just sorta got lost in the telling stuff.

Not telling as in passive, just telling as in moving the story forward.

Hellie said...

I do not talk to folks all day; and anyone who has talked to me once at this job knows to wait until I've drank at least part of my mountain dew before bothering me.

2nd Chance said...

I also do this as I’m writing. I’ve never sat down with and read the entire thing at one time. But after I write a scene, I’ll go back and read it aloud. Working in chunks and making corrections then moving on seems to make sense.

Have I ever seemed the sensible type to you? ;-)

Julie said...

My advice to you is: Get a halfway decent headset with a microphone attached to it. The mics are sensitive. So you won’t have to speak as loudly as you are right now. Record yourself reading you writing. Then you only have to read each section once. And you’ll be able to go back to your recording time after time …


My Dell came with Microsoft Sound Recorder. My guess is, if you're using a Windows OS you have the program too. Its a very basic program, it is simple to use. You've heard my voice recordings, right? So you know that It works just fine.

2nd Chance said...

Julie - Spaniels are very smart that way!

I imagine the Bonnie would be quite distracted if I wrote about squirrels...she knows that word! ;-)

2nd Chance said...

Julie - I don't want ta record fer posterity, not yet! But when I replace the old workhorse, I'll get one with the ability ta record and make podcasts...cause I like the idea!

2nd Chance said...

Donna - What website? How'd ya find a website fer our commentor?

Another one a' those code book thingies ya been keepin' from me? ;-/

Donna said...

Have I ever seemed the sensible type to you?

Wait. This is a trick question, right? :)

Donna said...

Chance, I think you may have convinced me when you mentioned you found places to add action to the dialogue. That is something I think would be very helpful.

Okay, everyone close your ears for a sec. I have to yell at Capt. Cha Code.

I WOULDN'T HAVE TYPED THE WRONG CODE IF YOU'D GET THOSE DAMN SQUIGGLY WORMS AWAY FROM THE WORDS/LETTERS!

*clears throat* Okay, we're good now. :)

2nd Chance said...

Well, Hel - I bet ya talk ta more people on any given day than I do!

Mountain Dew...hmmmm...that sounds so good. Haven't had one a' those in years...

Julie said...

OMGawddd ... Like I wanna record something for posterity. Like I WANT anyone except the person that the recording was made for to hear
it?!

Chance, i'm running on Windows 7. But I know for a fact that XP has it too. You probably have the program and don't even know it.

Donna said...

Julie, I have Vista and I'm looking around and don't see the program. Maybe I'll check out the Microsoft site to see if I can get it.

2nd Chance said...

Donna - Sorry, Captain Captcha is funky sometimes...

I'd try a page or two and see how it goes. There is a rhythm that when you stumble...you'll hear it and know this is a section you want to work on. I didn't always know exactly what to do, but I'd mark the paragraph/section and get back to it.

Janga said...

I'm an advocate of reading aloud too, although, other than children's books, I've never read a full book alood at one time.

I like reading aloud. Even with my introversion, I always loved doing poetry readings. But I'd read my work aloud with myself as sole audience, even if I didn't like doing so because the ear really does pick up flaws the eye misses. We spend so much time on our mss. that our eyes sometimes fail to see what is really on the page. Also, the ear is just quicker than the eye to sense problems with cadence and rhythm, as Chance found out when she sensed her narrative needed to be broken up. The ear also hears some grammatical errors that the eye misses. It may not label them, but it often hears an error that sends the writer back to reread and correct. I share Terri's evangelical enthusiasm for the benefits of this particular writing strategy.

Another strategy I use in the final stage of editing and proofreading is to read the ms. starting with the last sentence and moving backwards. Doing so forces me to see each sentence as discrete units, and I am more likely to catch errors.

End of lecture. Janga is folding her lecturn and stealing away.

2nd Chance said...

Julie - I'm on a pretty old OS... I'll see if the DH can find it in the archives. If we can brush the cobwebs off without disturbing the ghosts of Windows past...

2nd Chance said...

Janga - what ya stealing away with? ;-)

I can see the reading a sentence out of context ta find the grammatical errors, etc.

I'm hoping I found those reading it front ta back, because I don't want ta do this again. Not the total book at once. I had ta do this, as the revisions needed ta get back to the agent...self-imposed deadline I didn't want to miss. Having it done before the Nationals.

But yes! The ear/mouth catches things the eye and brain corrects automatically...because we, the writer, know what we meant to say! Uh...write...

Julie said...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sound_Recorder_(Windows)

"Sound Recorder (Windows)
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopediaJump to: Sound Recorder

A component of Microsoft Windows

Sound Recorder in Windows Vista
Details
Included with Microsoft Windows
Related components
Windows Media Player
Media Control Interface
Windows Audio service
Audio Compression Manager


Sound Recorder in Windows XP

Sound Recorder in Windows 3.1

Sound Recorder is an audio recording program included in Microsoft Windows. Versions prior to Windows Vista could only record 60 seconds at a time. The Vista version can record for longer durations but contains fewer options, and cannot play back recorded sound."

WYH? sounds like you have to get a tape player. Or have a friend record it for you.

2nd Chance said...

Ah, if I have it...I'm prior to Vista... The DH is looking forward to my new computer because we could use skype for when I'm away... It's gonna happen, soon as we have a chance to go check out laptops together to make sure I don't walk out with something totally not perfect for me!

And now, Queen Bonnaroo beckons and I must obey. We walk. Then I get me reward! A Starbucks sit down! WEEEEE!

Julie said...

WYH? sounds like you have to get a tape player. Or have a friend record it for you.

Unless you like to mess around with your program files ... talk about taking a chance, Chance!

2nd Chance said...

Wow, are there even tape recorders out there anymore? I remember one I had, old reel to reel. Honestly! A birthday present I was thrilled to get.

Ah, there are the little handheld ones. I always manage to screw those up, have pieces fall off that are really important...like the one that stops the pause...

I know there are ways to do it, because of podcasting! And I'll figure it out sometime in the next year or so. Because I think it would be interesting to do. I may talk to my agent about it next week.

That is so fun to say! I'll talk to my agent about it next week.

Hee, hee!

2nd Chance said...

Well, Bonnie...looks like the walk killed the blog. And it was going so well! Maybe they're all off reading their books outloud? Well, I doubt that! It is Friday, sweetie, and lots of play to catch up on this weekend!

I'll just move over here, to the bow and read my next book outloud, entertain the hotties...

*clears throat...

Bosun said...

Sorry, whole office went out for Mexican so now I'm stuffed and ready for a nap. Four page menu meant I managed to find ONE thing I was willing to eat. Huzzah!

I've heard Janga talk about the reading backwards before, as well as other authors, but I'm not sure I could do that. Maybe someday I'll try, but doing that sounds totally wrong to me.

Donna said...

I figured while the blog was on "Pause" I would take a shower and eat some lunch. Although I'm still hungry. Mmm. What else can I find?

And I'm thrilled you get to say that about speaking with your agent. :) It's an awesome feeling. Terri will get to meet my agent before I do. LOL

2nd Chance said...

Bo'sun - Mexican...hmmm, that sounds nice! I'm hoping to take the husband out to a new Mex place I discovered with my local RWA group. They have good margaritas!

Yeah, reading sentence by sentence backward...I can see it to find grammar, etc. Can't see it helping with flow and rhythm... But I never listened to any of the Beetles backwards, so who knows!?

2nd Chance said...

Well, Donna - Terri can tell you all about her! And yeah, that seems backwards, don't it!

Donna said...

Mexican food! THAT is exactly what I need. Yum. A margarita wouldn't be so bad either.

I had a friend that suggested that reading backwards thing, but it didn't make any sense to me. It made me think of that Beavis & Butthead episode where one of them is reading a warning label, and he recites: "Words, words, words." They mean nothing to him, and I figure that's how reading my manuscript backwards would be too.

Bosun said...

Donna - I promise to put in a good word about you. ;) Actually, I plan to rave about how cool you are and how happy we are to have you in the crew. (She knows you're a pirate, right?)

2nd Chance said...

One sentence at a time? I don't think it would help the story, but it would help seperate the grammar hassles, etc, from the story...so it could be a good proof reading technique.

Yeah, my DH deserves some Mex with margarita this weekend...two job interviews!

Donna said...

Yay for Mr. Chance! That's great news.

*blushes* Aw shucks, Terri. I don't know if she knows I'm a pirate -- I've told her I blog somewhere besides my own blog, but I don't know if she's ever checked out the ship. I'll have to find out!

2nd Chance said...

I can make her a button... My Author is a Pirate on The Romance Writers Revenge!

Hmmm. I should make one for Saritza!

I'll make a few...

Bosun said...

We are going to be buttons from head to toe. LOL!

Am I still getting my sock monkey button?

Donna - She'll know now. :)

2nd Chance said...

Yes, sock monkey is already all punched out and ready for you...

Bosun said...

*blinks innocently*

So placing a baseball beside the sock monkey is out of the question?

2nd Chance said...

Inside the sock monkey? Uh...how big is this sock monkey?

;o

I have a button with a baseball on it for you... I have one with a batter on it. And one with a baseball diamond on it. Now you want with a sock monkey and a baseball?

Like have on sitting on his lap? I actually might be able to do that...if I can find a small and likely looking enough baseball graphic...they're hard to find!

Bosun said...

Now, I didn't know you were making all of those. I only have so much lanyard space to pin these babies on. I thought combining the baseball sitting next to the monkey would be cute.

I'll see what I can find. DO NOT knock yourself out.

2nd Chance said...

I like playing with my button machine, haven't you figured that out yet? ;-)

Bosun said...

Well I need to cross polinate. LOL! Books on the baseball diamond. Bats over reports cards. Monkey next to baseball.

2nd Chance said...

Well, you can put the batter button next to the monkey button...let nature take its course...

Bosun said...

That's just wrong. On many, many levels.

2nd Chance said...

Hey, let's just keep your sweet little pink sock monkey away from Sin's undead monster...

Ya know, I think we're all alone...

*echo

*echo

*echo

2nd Chance said...

Good time to take a lunch break! And get Bonnaroo out for another walk...

Hellion said...

I don’t know if she knows I’m a pirate — I’ve told her I blog somewhere besides my own blog, but I don’t know if she’s ever checked out the ship.

*LOL* No worries, I wouldn't mention us either if I had an agent. *LOL*

Donna said...

Hellion, that's not it! LOL When we chat, it's about a zillion other things. . .you know what I'm talking about! LOL

I am SO drowsy today. It's raining and I'm being a total lizard and I think I'm headed for a nap.

Have one of the Hotties wake up in an hour, okay?

2nd Chance said...

This is a great blog! We generate a lot of hits and we have nice friends...published friends! I mention I blog here all the time...all part of marketing! Ya should tell her, Donnaroo!

Hellion said...

It's so much fun to tease Donna. She hyperventilates. *LOL*

2nd Chance said...

Don't worry, Donna. We'll make sure she knows you're a pirate. I'll get home and design those buttons...kay?

Julie said...

I like playing with my button machine, haven’t you figured that out yet?

And yetttt? I have no Button! Alas I am buttonless, less than, forever doomed to bask in the darkness of a buttonless pit.

*LOL* No worries, I wouldn’t mention us either if I had an agent. *LOL*

Now the Captain is UNmentioning me?
Tragic!
I've officially become an Unmentionable With Out Buttons!

Julie said...

"Well, Bonnie…looks like the walk killed the blog. And it was going so well! Maybe they’re all off reading their books outloud?"

Sorry , Chance. I had a lunch date with a cute lil Hottie and a bottle of scotch.
No.
Not Q,
My son. Its been a long year ... but having lunch with him and seeing him smile made my day ...my month ... my year! That and the Glenlivet *g*

Julie said...

It also helped to ease the pain of my buttonless-pit-of-a-pitiful-existence!

2nd Chance said...

OK, Julie...what sort of button would you like? ;-)