Hottie Crew Member of The Week - Laying Down The Law
Unless you’ve been living on a ship, in the middle of the ocean, with no internet or phone service, you’ve heard about the latest author vs. author “YOU STOLE MY IDEA” kerfluffle. If you don’t know about it, catch up here.
In light of this seemingly thin accusation, I thought I’d post a little advice here for aspiring Romance writers. This could even apply to published writers too, so everyone take heed.
If you write your hero and heroine having sex, say, on a bed. It’s been done before. Likewise, if you write them having sex in a shower, on the kitchen counter, on the library floor, in a carriage, in a wardrobe, on a desk, on the kitchen table, against a wall, in a chair, on a Harley, on a horse, in a small boat, on a ship (be it Pirate or otherwise), in an ancient Roman bath, against a tree, or in a dilapidated outbuilding on an English country estate, it’s been done. And needless to say, sex on the beach has also been done.
Now, if you write your hero and heroine having sex standing up….in a hammock. That might be a first. However, if later you learn someone else has also written her hero and heroine having sex standing up….in a hammock, you cannot sue her. Understand, love?
But, just in case a member of this crew should be faced with this situation in the future, you never know when another writer might imply prior ownership to the “boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets abducted by aliens and learns intergalactic sexual techniques that help him win girl back” plot idea, we’ve added a few good men of the lawyerly persuasion to the ship.
Anyone want to file a brief?
Books by the Crew
36 comments:
Finally, someone to save our asses! George, save me, save me!
That lawsuit cracks me up, btw.
I missed all the kerfluffle! But I think sometimes I live under a rock... Always wanted a lawyer on my side in all things. Lawyers are gods, it's only when the lawyers work for the other side that they are scum sucking sea slugs. To paraphrase Benjamin Franklin!
Briefs or boxers--or commando, I'll take George. Do you even have to ask?
I worked for a law firm once. One of the worst jobs I've ever had. Rudist, most selfish and arrogant people I've ever met. And I've also worked in hospitals and on Music Row, if that tells you anything.
But I knew George would be a favorite. LOL!
Um dear, if you're trying to detract me from suing you should not have such hot lawyers.lol. I will sue just to be near them!
This newest plagiarism kerfuffle is the silliest thus far. And it holds NO water. I guess the woman is starved for attention.
Did I tell you I'm pre-law?lol. Am I rude and selfish and arrogant?(Am not offended just curious if I'll fit in.*g*)
Why is George with silver hair hotter than with dark?
PS: If I write sex in a gopher hole(was that what they has sex in in An Affair Before Christmas?) will that be plagiarism?lol.
The only one I remember from AABC was under the tree. Which I failed to add to this list so we'll pretend it's in there.
And I did consider putting that disclaimer on there. This was my experience at this one particular law firm in a podunk town in Arkansas. I know there are good, nice lawyers out there, I'm just afraid they might be the minority? Just because my few experiences with lawyers have not been positive doesn't mean there are good ones out there.
But, ya know, I only see good ones on television. And I don't be played by actors, I mean on documentary type shows. We need more of those kinds.
What's the funniest part of this accusation is that the lawyer suggests that we all read the other author's work so that we can see if it's the same as Meyer's.
Um, can we say, cheap publicity?
Whatever. But sign me up for a slice of Clooney too. Yummy.
I once interned for the circuit court.. talk about rude people. Interesting work. Not something I'd want to do for the rest of my life. I also did telemarketing. Not fun either. Although, now I work in healthcare and can't say that doctors are any less rude than most lawyers. With that being said, look at all the shit that doctors, lawyers and judges have to put up with. No wonder they are a bit assholish at times.
Marn - Not much of a veiled attempt, is it? LOL!
Sin - I did telemarketing for four hours and quit. Just walked out. Horrible job.
George's docket is seriously filling up, isn't it? You know, there are two other guys on the payroll here. Spread the love, wenches.
I have been way out of the loop on vacation, so too was ignorant of the Meyer kerfluffle. I would not want to claim to be responsible for her prose/plots (sorry, all you fans---I tried to read one book and just couldn't, but boy, do all the high school kids check her books out of our library, so to each his own), but I wouldn't mind claiming any one of these foxy faux lawyers.Actually my best guy friend is a Virginia country lawyer, the sweetest guy in the world.
I be the practical one. I don't care what me lawyer looks like, long as he's slick in the right way ta win me case.
George’s docket is seriously filling up, isn’t it? You know, there are two other guys on the payroll here. Spread the love, wenches
I'll buy the other two a sympathy drink. We could sit in the crow's nest and admire the view .... and chat about pirates of course. :lol:
BTW - All of those sex scene descriptions are ones that I've read. Except the "in a hammock" one. Anyone have a good, unusual one I might have missed?
Maggie - I haven't read one word of the series, but I'm pretty sure Ms. Meyer is not hurt by our lack of interest. LOL!
Q - For those drinks you have yourself two new solicitors. You never know when another scientist might try to usurp your theories.
Chance - When you realize how much you pay these men by the hour, you'll want something pretty to look at for your coin.
Anyone have a good, unusual one I might have missed?
Terri,in my reading I have also come across most of the scenes you describe. As a novelty I can suggest sex in space in zero gravity. Very sensual and unusual, though the lack of weight reduces friction. Still, its worth a few dreams! *grin*
Ya gots a point, Terrio. 'Sides, if'n he be good lookin' it distracts the jury...
My, we bein' sexist taday! What 'bouts the lady laywers!?
Um, sex in a confession box? I have Jackie Barbosa to thank for that one.It really was insanely hot, though I may go to hell for reading it.lol.
I've known a lot of lawyers(did mock trial in high school. Competitions are judged by lawyers) and it seems that they're like everyone else you meet. Some are jackasses. Some are amazingly nice and some fall in the middle. Same goes for doctors.
Chance - we have enough ladies on this ship already. Well, maybe *ladies* is overstating it just a bit.
Kelly - A confessional? Really? That is definitely unusual. LOL!
What I remember about the AABC scene is the snow! EJ has a collection now--in a boat, in a Roman bath, beside a stream. LOL!
But I think Tessa's wardrobe takes the prize for most unusual. :)
I must also live under a rock, as well. Oh, well. I'm with Maggie on this one, I tried to read the first one and I barely made it through the first page. But my neice who's 14, loves them.
OT-Terri, congrats on winning the partial critique from Valerie, over at the bandits!
Di
Janga - The wardrobe was certainly new. I won't be surprised if we see an increase in wardrobe sales this winter. LOL!
Di - Thanks! I'm so excited. It's like a gift that came at the perfect time.
Isn't Meyer's college roommate also suing her because they "wrote" the concept together.
BTW, I love lawyers, especially the one I married. : )
I've read wardrobe sex before Tessa's. But it's still a fun place. Though I'm one that's happy just as long as they're having sex.lol. Doesn't matter where.Bed works.
Beth - Thank you, we have a spotting of another good one. We're making progress. LOL! And I didn't know that about her roommate, but I didn't know this wasn't the first lawsuit the woman has faced.
Kelly - I'm with you. As long as they don't shut the door, I'm good wherever it may be.
Q - Are you saying you've read sex in zero gravity or you recommend it? ;)
Hm. Two people suing Meyer? Um, that's kinda weird. Although, I know many people are positive JK Rowling is a plagiarist(and I'm not inclined to agree or disagree...she does skirt the line rather closely) so maybe it's just par for the course?
But there's one piece of evidence that these new alligations are indeed false(other than the the previously stated). Who the heck would read Breaking Dawn and want to pass it of as theirs?lol.
Amen Kelly.
The name, Breaking Dawn... Just too damend close to breaking wind...
More like sucking wind.
Chance - Large chunks of Breaking Dawn stunk like someone broke wind.
Definitely not her best effort. Though I didn't mind the last third of the book as bad. But 33% is still a FAIL in anyone's ranking scale.
PS, this is a lot of comments for a Sunday. Glad to see you guys out and about on a weekend!
Marnee, it's been fun seeing the girls out and snarky on a Sunday.*g*
You liked the last 33% of Breaking Dawn? What did you think of Jacob imprinting on(what the hell is the kid's name?) Nessie?
Have to admit that seeing Taylor Lautner as Jacob is making Edward look really, really bad. Because Robert does not wash or comb his hair and looks perpetually stoned-as does Kristin(Bella), though...Hm. Jacob deserves better than a pot head girlfriend.
I'm so not inspired to read either book! LOL!
I was one of the few who liked Breaking Dawn. Being she laid the groundwork for imprinting on Nessie (horrible name), I wasn't a bit surprised. I saw that coming like a nuclear bomb from 100 miles away. So because she laid the groundwork far enough in advance and didn't pull her punches in the end, I had to give her credit for following through. I believed her when she explained in a way to be as "least creepy as possible."
But then I also don't think JK Rowling is a plagarist either. EVERY fantasy novel ever written follows the same lame hero's circle, with the same beats and requirements--and Harry just follows that circle faithfully. Just as LOTR did. Just as Star Wars did. Just as EVERY FANTASY STORY DOES.
Never read it, and not inclined to, at this rate.
As for lawyers, we tend to be a mixed breed, but about 95% of us are Type-A personalities, which could explain some of the less appealing characteristics. A lot of lawyers are good people, it's just that the jerks tend to be more vocal.
I'll definitely jump on the George train (literally - sign me up, buy me a ticket, and get me out of town with Mr. Clooney).
Marn - This is a lot of comments for a Sunday. LOL!
As I say, I haven't read one word of these books so I can't say one way or the other. But again, they are aimed at the younger generation and thousands (millions?) of them adore the books. I don't feel so bad missing the boat on something that wasn't meant for me anyway. *shrugs*
Kelly - That must be it. You should really be more vocal. :)
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