Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Of Taglines and Blurbs, Oh My!


 


I’m going to the NJ RWA conference in October and it will be my first conference.  I’m incredibly excited, especially because I’ll get to meet so many of you that I’ve only known so far through cyberspace.  If you’re going to be there, let me know!  We’ll have to get together.


I started picking the pirates' brains for ways I should be preparing.  (I'm planning to pitch).  They suggested that I have business cards to give to editors or agents, anyone I meet.


Business cards, huh?  I figured this would be as simple as visiting VistaPrint and letting my fingers do the walking.  They’d be here in plenty of time and I’d be ready to go.


Simple has nothing to do with it.


The pirates informed me that my cards could have a tagline and a blurb on them.  I promptly thought, “What a fabulous idea!  When I give them to editors/agents they’ll be able to remember my book/me better!”


Sounds easy enough, right? 


Um, no.  At least not for me.


I’ve spent the past days stressing the word choice, harassing my blogmates/CPs, and generally working myself into a mouth-foaming frenzy.   Or maybe it’s working my blogmates/CPs into a mouth-foaming frenzy.  Both, possibly.


First, I started with my tagline.  Something short, catchy, attention-grabbing.  Ok, I tell myself, think reminiscent of frustrating songs I hear in the morning and can’t get out of my head.  Sin even supplied “Sexy Back” by Justin Timberlake as inspiration.  (Yep, I sang that annoying song all day.  I’d imagine it’ll be with you today now as well.  I know, I know.  You’re welcome.)  


After much emailing and due to an inane inability to allow something to sit and congeal in my brain, I think I’ve settled on either “Making History Magical” or “History Made Magical.” 


Blurb writing was just as bad.  It needs to be a tease; give enough info to tell the reader about your story but still make them want to read it.  A few lines, tops.  But again, catchy, pleasing to the ear.  The best I’ve got so far is:


“A witch struggles to protect her guardian; her guardian struggles to protect his heart.  But will love's spell be all the protection they need?


Still messing with it, but it’s a start.


I’ve decided to wait a few weeks to start working on my pitch.  I think my blogmates/CPs need a break.


Have you written your tagline or blurb?  Any advice for the rest of us?  Are there any author’s taglines you think are great?    If you haven’t tried writing yours yet, give it a shot here today.  We’ll do what we can to help.

74 comments:

Quantum said...

Prof Q PhD.
For that special spell. Magic and romance guaranteed!

The blurb will have to wait until I finish the book. The Sea Sirens would never forgive me if I revealed their presence prematurely!

Tiffany said...

Good topic, Marnee.

I'm still working on mine, have a couple pitches to choose from, now, thanks to my CP, Ely. And I'm playing around with tags. Nothing yet. That seems to be harder to come up with, for me at least.

Maggie Robinson said...

I can't stress how important this is. And keep your tagline by the phone at all times. When my agent called me, I rambled on so I finally stopped myself and said. "I know I should have a short pitch but I don't," LOL. Thank God she can do my pitching for me, because I just suck at it. Marnee, I hope you have a fabulous time! And good luck with the contest!I entered the PYHIAB contest too, but they never got my entry. Somewhere it's floating around unloved in cyberspace, but at least I'm getting my $ back.:)

Marnee Jo said...

Q - The Sea Sirens. I love it. :)

Tiff - Go you with the pitches (and go Ely too for helping out!) I haven't gotten there yet. I think after my tagline/blurb experience, I'll put pitches off for a few weeks. Are you pitching at NJ? I am excited about meeting you guys.

Maggie - LOL about your agent. Thank you, I'm sure I'm going to have fun, though I am nervous already. That's annoying about your entry. I'm glad they'll get your money back. There was an issue with my registration getting through, so maybe their site is just having some issues.

Marnee Jo said...

Here's a question for those of you with pseudonyms. Did you put your real name or pseudonym on your card?

Tiffany said...

Yes I'm pitching. :) Signed up as soon as I could!

No business cards for me. I don't think they do much good except for networking with other writers. So no advice on pseudonyms. Mine may change for my historicals, I can't imagine them liking kenzie, only time--and a deal--will tell.

terrio said...

Way to throw those letters around, Q. And I love the tagline.

Marn - I really do feel bad about stirring this all up. It really was just an off-the-cuff comment and now I feel responsible for any unnecessary brain cells you burned in the last couple of days. LOL!

I don't have a tagline for my writing, but my personal tagline has become, "Talks a lot but means well." :)

Hellion said...

*pointing at Terri* Yeah, SHE started it all. Drink more rum, Marnee, it'll be okay.

I have my fake name on the business cards, with my real name under it. Terri said this was weird. So I wouldn't suggest copying what I did.

My tagline: Laughter is the first step to falling in love.

I don't have a blurb for GOGU, or at least I don't remember it. Oh, wait, something about: Quirky New-Age Plain Jane falls for and marries twice-divorced Charmer, then must unravel the mystery of the woman who shoots him. (A. I took away one of his marriages; B. It sounds very uncompelling this way...)

A New-Age Plain Jane pinky swears to avoid Ben Tucker.
Ben Tucker swears she'll be his no matter what.
Will their marriage survive past the honeymoon when it appears he's up to his old tricks?

This book is so going to gather dust under the bed. *sighs heavily*

Okay, Adam & Eve.

The Original Sinners go to Sin City to find new spouses, but soon find the course of true love doesn't run any smoother when your options are more than one.

Marnee Jo said...

No cards, Tiff? Man, I might follow you down that road. Trying to figure out what to put on them makes me want to chuck the whole project. LOL!!

Ter - Just cause you started it doesn't mean that I didn't need to make up my mind about it all. You were just the catalyst to the meltdown. :)

Hellion - Laughter is the first step to falling in love -- I love this. Very you. And I like your blurbs. They tell you enough to get you into it, but don't give everything away. Very well done.

Elyssa said...

Maggie, the same thing happened to me with the NJ contest. Welcome back money to my account! LOL.

Taglines are hard to come by; I don't envy anyone who's trying to come up with one.

Jordan said...

I have neither tag line nor blurb, but I do have a hook that I'm just in love with. Probably too much.

I know you don't want to see it, but NOW IT'S YOUR TURN TO SUFFER.... Um, I mean . . . I love helping you, Marn. . . . ;)

The reason I don't see it as a "blurb" or a "pitch" is that it doesn't get the dead body in there. Or Charlie. (Y'know, you'd think for such a busy book, I wouldn't have any worries about word count. Not so.)

So, hook, which may or may not eventually end up at the beginning of a query letter:

Sure, they'd have to fool the press, eight million New Yorkers and the international art community--but it was only a little con.

terrio said...

Oh, Jordan, right there I think, "How in the world is the author going to pull THIS off?" LOL! Perfect hook!

Captain - I love that tagline and the blurbs. I'm going to put some real thought into thinking about mine. Hmmmmm.....let me see what I can come up with.

haleigh said...

Marnee! I love "History made magical." I'm sure you'll do wonderful at the conference, perfect business cards or not.

I have neither a tag line or blurb, and the thought alone of getting either makes my head hurt. But it certainly sounds like you're on the right track!

Hellion - I love the blurb for Adam and Eve - that's enough to make me desperately want to read more *g*

Marnee Jo said...

Ely - It happened to you too?! I really think they're having some serious technical issues. But, at least they're refunding you. :) Your tagline is "Sexy is Funny" right? I like that a lot.

Jordan - Thank for not rubbing that in, ya know?

I like that hook! I love the premise of the Con Artist. Oh, and I love Charlie.

Sin said...

I don't have a tag line or a blurb. I don't plan on it either.

Love your tag line and blurb Marn. The pirates really did great helping you.

Jordan said...

Oh, I just came up with a tag line!

I'm awesome. Buy my book.

Subtle, no? Very apt. Believe me. Buy my book. ;)

Hellion said...

Jordan: I *LOVE* that hook! And I love your tag line, even though it's gloriously unsubtle. Probably why I love it. I'm not exactly a subtle person myself...and neither are the men I date. *LOL* Unsubtle is cool!

*LOL* And I love Sin too. "Don't have one, ain't gonna make one..." because (and this is unsaid) you can't make me.

Hal: Thank you. *blushing* Okay, must write faster.

ReneeLynnScott said...

Great blog.

Tagline=Unlocking History Through Romance

Blurb= In my ideal world I'd have one that would blow your leather boots off, but in the real world, my blurb sucks, which I have been told in a more kindly fashion, by one agent and one published author. See for yourself...

A Highlander turned English border warden discovers his biggest challenge is safe guarding his heart against the delectable Border Hellion who insists on becoming his mistress in exchange for her murderous brother.

Business cards= none, but I'd definitely put my pseudonym on them.

Gosh, Marn, now I'm going to have to go work, and I don't have a conference anywhere in the near future.

Renee

Elyssa said...

Yes, it happened to me. I entered when the contest first opened and thought my submissions went through. Apparently it didn't happen because of the technical glitches.

As to my tagline, it's changing.

ReneeLynnScott said...

LOL, Ok I never claimed to be a grammar goddess, the more kindly fashion should totally be a kindlier fashion. I've been editing too much lately. Blame it on brain fog.

Renee

Jordan said...

Thanks, Terri, Marnee and Hellion :D ! Buy my book?

Here, I fixed it:

Sure, they'd have to fool the press, eight million New Yorkers and the international art community--but it was only a little con. Until someone died.

(And just for you, Marn, I'll add in "Charlie!" at the end. But he didn't die. He has to live! Live for the sequel! Live so the Mafia can try to kill him in the next book!)

Hellion said...

Renee: I wouldn't say it sucks...it's just a mouthful. There's no chance to pause for breath or focus on what the sentence/blurb means. And I don't think it's your fault--because people emphasize we need to use descriptor words for our hero and heroine, and we end up with paragraph sentences to "follow the rules" of it.

A [adj: bitter?] border warden discovers his biggest challenge is safe guarding his heart against the delectable [need diff adj so don't repeat "border"--either remove first border or this one] Hellion who insists on becoming his mistress in exchange for [letting] her murderous brother go.

Hmmm. Hmmm.

All he wants to do is his job; all she wants to do is get her brother freed. But when she exchanges her virtue to the one man who can help her, will she lose herself as well?

Of course, this doesn't say anything about historical...or Scotland...

Stephanie J said...

I have no tagline! And after the stress of making cards for the RWA conference I handed out exactly two cards (although one of them was to JQ so you know... haha jk). Even after the stress of making them look good when I finally showed them to Mary she noticed that the centering on the card was completely off. Don't ask me how I missed this. I used the dang centering feature on the website! Oh well.

There's an agent blog that talked about business cards. It was pretty good information but it boiled down to not offering a card to an agent or an editor unless they ask for one because they just end up throwing them away. Eek! I wish I could remember the name of the agent but I saw the post in passing...

Hey Jordan, can we steal your tagline? ;)

Hellion said...

Ooh, Jordan, I love that hook even more. That's a blurb, isn't it? I mean, it can double as either, right? I'd so buy that book! It sounds like The Thomas Crown Affair with a murder.

Marnee Jo said...

Hal, when you're ready for tagline/blurbing, let us know. :)

Sin - Thank you for your incredible help. "Sexy Back" was valuable in my thinking process. :)

Jordan - I suspect "I'm awesome. Buy my book." pretty much sums it up. ;)

Marnee Jo said...

Renee - I love Unlocking History through Romance. :) And I agree, it's just a mouthful.

I like Hellion's attempt: "All he wants to do is his job; all she wants to do is get her brother freed. (Maybe 'all she wants to do is free her brother?' instead?) But when she exchanges her virtue to the one man who can help her, will she lose herself as well?

Janga said...

I'll leave the tags and the blurbs until I finish revisions. I had hoped to finish this month, but RL postponed that great day. I am now aiming for the end of September and hoping life between now and then is crisis-free.

I thought I had my pseudonym chosen since my real name is odd, hard to pronounce, and connected to my other writing. But a published writer told me I should use Janga since I have some recognition in the romance community under that name, and my blogmates agreed. So I'm thinking Janga Brannon Burke or Janga Burke Brannon or Janga Brannon or . . .

Jordan said...

Stephanie--I don't suppose I can copyright it ;) .

Hellion--Yes! I'm graduating to a blurb! Hooray!

It IS like the Thomas Crown Affair with a murder! Kind of. Except I've never seen the Thomas Crown Affair. Oh, and no British accents. I keep meaning to see that, esp. since the original came out 8 years before the story's set.

(Hey Marn--Wouldn't it be AWESOME if Christopher/Fredrick/what's-his-peanut-butter-sandwich and Margaux had seen the Thomas Crown Affair on a date? I'm so AWESOME!)

Hellion said...

Oh, you need to rent TTCA immediately, Jordan. Pierce Brosnan ROCKS in it. It's so cool...the ending is so worth it.

Janga, I like the Janga Burke Brannon... :) And I like the name recognition. (I wish Hellion would work for that reason. *LOL*)

ReneeLynnScott said...

Hellion, my jaw just hit the floor! You need to put on a workshop or something. This is wonderful, all I need to do is tweak it and add a historical tidbit or something.

Thank you, thank you, mmmmwah!

Renee

Hellion said...

Oh, no, no workshops for me. Besides, it was Dee, my crit partner who was helping with Marnee's that had this even stick in my brain. A short sentence, a short sentence, then a question. Or maybe Terri did the short sentence, short sentence, then Dee said the question bit. I don't know. It was them. I was just practicing...and it's always easier to write someone else's than your own. That's a fact.

Glad you liked it though and it works! :)

Marnee Jo said...

Ely - crazy technical malfunctions. That's so annoying. I know I had to register three times before I sent the registrar my info to input manually. Site issues, I think. Technology is supposed to make our lives easier, I thought.

Jordan - The mafia's going to be after him in the next book?! Nice!!! And I think that the Thomas Crown Affair is a great date movie for Margaux and the pretentious prig. Oh, and yes, it's confirmed: you are awesome. LOL!!

terrio said...

Goodness, it's all crazy here today. And y'all are getting so much done. LOL! Me, not so much. I keep getting distracted.

I loved the Thomas Crown Affair but for some reason can't remember the ending. Hmmmm....I do know I loved Russo's hair in that one.

Janga - Love the Janga Brannon Burke one. And then we can all call you JBB when we talk about your books. LOL! The end is near, never fear!

ReneeLynnScott said...

Janga, definitely go with it. Not sure how you'd chose which B to put first though.

Jordan, you are having way too much fun, or maybe too much rum. Can you pass some this way?

Hellion, I can't believe I've never heard of the short sentence, short sentence, question, but it so works and IT clicks in my head, which means it's very doable. Why didn't anyone ever say that before? sheesh!

Guess I'm going to have to watch TTCA.

Renee

Oh, thanks for the procrastination, I needed it today for my mental stability.

terrio said...

Okay, I have a tagline...I think. What about this:

Healing broken hearts, one book at a time.

Hellion said...

Renee, we're pirates: we like to keep it simple and easy to remember. *LOL* Short, short, question. People are always trying to fluff it up to make the workshop last longer. Clearly any workshop I'd have would last 15 minutes tops, then we'd head to the bar. (Bet I'd be popular!)

Terrio: That has your angst all over it! Go for it!

ReneeLynnScott said...

Love it Terri.

Hellion, fifteen minutes and the bar sounds like a deal to me. Just think, you have a year to plan. Your workshop will be one I won't miss in D.C. :):)

Renee

terrio said...

Oh, you like it. Cool, I'm going with that then. Of course, I have no where to go with that as my cards are done and I don't have a website, but when I get one, I'm going with that. LOL!

Now, back to the blurb.

Julie said...

Just passin' through... reading the posts when...
Janga! I love Janga Brannon Burke! It just rollllls off the tongue.
And Hellion
How about
Haley Leon’ ? Spiritual meaning: Creative Heart & Braves , Courageous.
Or
Haley Ione? Spiritual meaning: Creative Heart & Inner Beauty.

"snicker"

Julie said...

AND Gosh, I can’t go to a conference without a business card that has my whatsit name & a tagline on it? Uhhh… something that says something about Me & My work, huh? How about…

Kitty Khan or kitty Con
Artiste’
This is a hold up. Give me your walet

ReneeLynnScott said...

All right, is this any better?

The king demands peace; he’s the man for the job. She’s forced to gain her brother’s freedom. But when she exchanges her virtue to the one man who can help her, will she find herself shackled as well?

Still a mouth full?

Renee

Hellion said...

Julie, you are a riot. "This is a stickup, give me your wallet." *LOL*

Hellion said...

No, not a mouthful--because it's broken down into beats. I like it...it works, it's intriguing. The shackled thing ties into the brother's incarceration...and the king lets us know it's a historical.

YEAH! You have your blurb!

Marnee Jo said...

Steph - I'm totally paranoid that I'm going to order my cards and they'll be off-center or have some spelling error or something too. Note to self: check cards 239569 times. LOL!

Janga - I love Janga Brannon Burke too. Does roll off the tongue. :)

terrio said...

Oh, that stickup line is perfect for a pirate's business card. LOL! Genius!

Renee - I love it. Well done!

Marnee Jo said...

I am pretty sure that it was a collective pirate effort that got me to short sentence, short sentence, question. And Hellion's just being modest.

Marnee Jo said...

I did notice I said the "we" helped Renee today, but I also notice I was very little a part of the we. Go you guys for helping Renee today! :) I like it, great job!

Marnee Jo said...

Ter - this is awesome.... "Healing broken hearts, one book at a time."

Renee, glad we could help you today!

Julie - You're cracking me up. This is a stick up... LOL!

Marnee Jo said...

How about now I'm messing with mine... Again?

A witch struggles to save her guardian;
Her guardian struggles to save his reputation.
Could love be the only salvation they need?

ReneeLynnScott said...

Oh, whew. I guess I just needed a pirate to show me the compass. Short, short, question will be a part of my verbiage from here on out. (Does anyone else here dance moves, quick, quick, slow?)

I'm wishing I had more wit today, like Julie's stick em up, but these revisions are making me slow and sleepy. That's good right, I'm getting somewhere? I think I've been on land way too long. I need some high seas adventure.

Renee

Marnee Jo said...

Short short question. Easy to remember, as the Cap'n says.

And I think I need some more rum.

Hellion said...

I know Terri liked the strong verb approach, and she's right...but...

A witch is determined to save her guardian;
Her guardian is determined to save his reputation.
Could love be the only spell they need?

Or something with love and determined...in it. But Love is determined to save them both...or...

Aargh.


(I'm sorry; I really liked the line you had yesterday with the spell in it...)

Marnee Jo said...

LOL! I'm twisted in "not quite perfect" verbs.

Elyssa said...

Marnee, what are 5 words you would use to describe your heroine and hero?

terrio said...

I like Hellion's version for Marn. I think having spell in there is good plus it brings your tag line into it. You know, making things *magical*.

I have two lines but can't find the question. Still working. Oh, and the short, short, question thing kind of came out of that blog I did that was based on something Christina Dodd did. So Christina really deserves the credit. LOL!

But Dee did point out that Marn needed the question at the end.

ReneeLynnScott said...

Marnee, first let me say that you were a big part of the 'we'. If you hadn't written the blog, I wouldn't have put myself out there so that I could get help.

And Marnee, I like Hellion's use of determined, I think it's a much stronger verb.

But you mention protecting his reputation, is the witch making him crazy? Is she messing with his life to protect him?

Hmmm

A witch is determined to save her guardian;
Her guardian is determined to save his reputation.
Could a love spell be even more determined?

Hmmmm, I don't know.

Renee

Marnee Jo said...

Five each, or total?

Cory's practical, responsible, and loyal
Julian is cynical, determined (nearly obsessed), and underneath, soft-hearted (with an Alpha hard shell, but more of "the melt in your mouth, not in your hand" variety than the straight up hard-ass alphas).

Elyssa said...

Or whatever it may be.

Elyssa said...

I think what's throwing me off is the repetition of "determined." I think you have to change it up.

Like...

Accused of murder, he has no one who believes in him except the one person he's sworn to protect.

Marnee Jo said...

Renee - I was thinking of using the reputation thing because that's his motivation through the story, to clear his reputation. The ton believes he killed his wife.

I like determined too. I was thinking struggle, strive, aims, even resolves.... They're all strong, but I'm not sure which fits my story right....

THanks for your help! I appreciate it. It's all still marinading in the murky brain matter...

And I'm glad we helped you.

Marnee Jo said...

I think maybe you're right, Ely. Two determineds is a lot of determination, maybe...

terrio said...

I don't know, I like the repeat. Gives it a good rythme.

Marnee Jo said...

I'm sure it'll all click soon. Probably while I'm sleeping or driving, always seems to work that way, when I've got no pen handy. LOL!

terrio said...

Question - isn't Cory's initial determination to save her orphanage? The protecting her guardian kind of comes in unexpected-like right? So maybe the first line needs tweaked a bit.

ReneeLynnScott said...

Well then, what if the witch is determined to protect him, and he's obsessed with his reputation?

Renee

Who is over the moon that you all helped me.

Marnee Jo said...

Ter - that's what sends her to London, but it isn't the ultimate story motivation. Sort of the catalyst.

terrio said...

Oh, then I'm out of ideas. :)

Marnee Jo said...

LOL!! I think it'll click if I just leave it in my head a few days. :) I'll keep you posted.

terrio said...

Well, I give up. I've started and stopped a blurb three times and all I have to show for it is a massive headache. I'm going to pop two tylenol and close the file.

Marnee Jo said...

Sorry Ter. I know, it definitely shouldn't be that hard to come up with three lines or whatever, but there it is.

Jordan said...

Just to clarify for Renee, I don't drink. (Nope, not even cyberme drinking cyberrum.)

Instead, I am intoxicated with MY OWN AWESOMENESS. (And yes, if you really want, you can be intoxicated with my awesomeness, too.)

If I had to go the short-short-question route, I'd probably have to go the short-short-short-question route. Then I could get Charlie in there.

But I'd rather work on rewrites and revisions right now on my limited brain cells

Marnee Jo said...

And there is enough of your awesomeness for us all to be intoxicated. ;)

ReneeLynnScott said...

Well then bring on your Awesomeness Jordan, I need a drink.

Renee

You’ve Got 5 Seconds! : said...

[...] love her comment about romance being a given. *duh* I went back to the drawing board. Then Romance Writer’s Revenge, blogged about tag lines and blurbs; one of their writers is getting ready to pitch at a conference [...]