Obsession
I stood at the edge. My hair floated behind me like a black cloak protecting me from evil. Today the wind blew fierce, chilling me to the bone. Yet, I didn’t shiver in fear. I didn’t shrink back from the edge. I embraced it. The waves crashed into the rocks below. The jagged rocks of despair. I could not feel lonely here. Here was my destiny. I belonged here among the broken edges.
I rocked forward. The wind carried me to my tip toes. I could feel the freedom within my grasp. I was a heartbeat away. All I had to do was let go. Let go and embrace the chance. The risk. To take it in. For the moment and just be myself. I wanted this more than anything. I just wanted to be with him one last time before he was no more than a whisper. I wanted it to be real.
This was the only way.
I took a deep breath. The salt water spray burned my nose, stung my eyes, but I didn’t look away from the horizon. The edge of eternity hovered within my reach. Reminded me of why I came here. The darkness rolling in would be my salvation. It would carry me away when I didn’t think it was possible. At my back, the sun burned bright. The struggle between good and evil. And I was in the middle. I would always been stuck. I had to take charge of my future.
I stood at the edge. Looking out.
My heart was timed to the crashing of waves. With each moment, my heart grew heavier. A gust of wind blew over the cliff and carried me closer. Closer to flying. I wanted wings. I wanted to fly. I wanted that freedom. For just once in my life.
I didn’t think.
I didn’t look.
I was airborne.
The way the wind fluttered through the long layers of my dress made me feel like I was floating. The breath in my lungs was nonexistent. The black oblivion swallowed me whole and pushed me further down.
And I embraced the darkness. It was my soul. It was my guiding light.
It was my eternity. With him.
When writing a great love story, there is always tragedy before eternal bliss. What’s the biggest obstacle your hero/heroine face and how do they connect? For our readers, what’s the best black moment you’ve ever read?
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54 comments:
Lovely snippet Sin.
You caught my mood perfectly this morning....but I don't have the relief of eternal bliss to look forward to as yet.
You see I tried out that bent Ninja banana that you sent. It demolished my neighbour's apple tree! and my heroine is due back from holiday tomorrow.
Perhaps my tragedy is about to unfold. *g*
I second Quantum. Love your blog.
The very best black moment I've ever read? You already know the answer to that one Sin! It's still haunting me. Surpasses every black moment I've read since.
So next to yours, I'd say the scenes between Mary and Rhage in LE. Heart-wrenching.
Oh no, Quantum. A bent ninja banana sounds suspiciously like a boomerang. I have had a similar experience, involving a broken window and the imminent arrival of my mother from the grocery store...but I was twelve. Good luck.
My black moment...damn, that's hard this early in the morning. I'm not there yet in this particular WIP, and I'm trying not to think about it just yet, but if the story as it's been so far will be any indication, I might rip my hair out trying to figure it out.
Stef, I'm a fan of the Brothers, but I loved LE the best. Rhage and Mary, OMG their black moment...
I'm such a dolt I kept waiting for the metaphor. Something to tell me she didn't *really* jump. I should have known better. Powerful, Sin. Powerful stuff.
I haven't written my black moment yet, but I know what it is. I know that I have to break my heroine's heart. And then she breaks my hero's heart. I get verklempt just thinking about it so writing will take a least a box of tissues.
Best black moment. Let me think. Hmmmm...*jeopardy music plays* I'm sure it's in a Romanctic Suspence either by Nora or Julie Garwood. I'm leaning toward Nora.
Sin, I love your blogs to no end.
Black moments... gotta love 'em. I have many of them, they allow your character to grow and create a stability from knowledge for their futures. It's all part of the learning experience as humans.
Q- I'm not responsible for your banana-ing ways. *grin* You have to learn how to flick your wrist the right way.
Tis a bummer about the apple tree though. I doubt your heroine will be as understanding as I am about the perils of being a super secret ninja.
And about the mood, I'm in that mood too. Still. I wish I was close to writing my black moment. I might have to break my cardinal rule and write a scene out of order.
JK, you'll figure it out and when you do, it will be the best black moment you've ever written.
Stef, you flatter me to no end.
I have to agree. Rhage and Mary's black moment in LE is probably one of the most painful ones I've ever read. The book holds a special place in my heart. And that has to do with you pushing me to read them.
Ter- I'm not as clever as Hellion. Metaphors are her forte. If this blog would've been written by Hellion, it would've made a helluva lot more sense and told an actual story. And interesting story at that.
I knew you were going to mention a Nora black moment.
Tiff- I feel the same way about black moments. I think readers relate to characters better once they have a grasp of the main characters personality and that black moment ties them to the character forever.
I love black moments in fiction. The more powerful, the more I crave.
Sin: have you been re-reading that vampire series again? Twilight and the rest? This feels like a clip from that. Only with you in the staring role, because I know if you had a chance to be with Edward, you'd leap off that cliff so fast, people would think they just imagined seeing you there at all!
Biggest obstacle that my hero/ine face and how do they connect? Hmmm. Eve wants to be FREE, independent, self-sufficient--and not paired with Adam. She just wants to be Eve, not someone's other half, even if she's the better half. HOWEVER, the rules of her divorce obligates her to find someone to be married to or she'll have to spend the rest of eternity as Adam's other half (and so far, that's not been working out). Adam needs to find another wife, but unfortunately is still in love with Eve, who won't have a thing to do with him. Adam does love Eve, but he, well, FORGETS when she insults him and maligns him and says things like, "I wish we'd never met." I'd say Eve's blind hatred is his biggest obstacle...and his inability to let go of what he considers a good thing.
I'm not sure how to make their moment black though...or make it really seem like they are never going to be together.
Wow. What a great blog, Sin. You had me captivated!
I love black moments, too...the worse they are, the more I love 'em. The black moment at the end of the last Harry Potter movie was soooooo damn well written and so heart-stopping. I can still cry thinking about it.
I loved the last black moment I wrote, and I'm starting the last book in the series. Don't know what the black moment will be, but I love trying to make them great.
Hellion- that actually is a reoccuring dream I have had since I was a kid. I'm always wearing a black dress. Almost like a broomstick skirt, but more flowy, with no back save a little ribbon tied in a neat bow. The dress is linen, layered. The material is so thin it's transparent. I'm always standing on the edge of a cliff while the wind whips through me. It's a like a crossroad dream for me. I have it when I have a difficult choice to make. Sometimes I jump. Sometimes the wind throws me backwards. And sometimes someone is standing there with me, holding my hand as the sun warms our backs. I never speak. I just stand on the edge looking out at the horizon. My heart is always heavy and sometimes it feels like it will never end.
I am rereading the Twilight saga again. I'm enjoying how well written they are. Enjoying an author who obviously loves her fans and her characters. It's a good change for me.
Ely- Still have not read the HP books. I've been told a million times to do so. Eventually I'll get there.
I love writers who love to write the black moments. And if you try to one up your black moment from the last time there should be no doubt that it's fantastic.
Man, we're never going to get over the JE debacle, are we? Of course, if JKRowling had done to the HP books what JE has done to the Plum books, yeah...it'd be bad. (Of course, I'm sure there are some fans who think they ended wrong anyway: some never liked Hermione and Ron getting together...as well as the other things that happened.)
What a freaky dream. And how freaky it comes when you have an important decision to make--but I like the varied endings. Does it help you come to terms with the decisions you have to make?
Hellion- You write kick ass black moments. Don't worry. It will come to you in a moment of brilliance, like usual.
You still haven't watched the POTC movies either--and they're awash in black moments too.
Can you say Bella on the cliff?
Lovely haunting scene! One of the best black moments- In New Moon,Bella lying in the woods after Edward had forsaken her... makes my stomach twist in a knot all over again. I love writing black moments, angst is my middle name:)
Sin - this is a beautiful blog. I didn't mean to make it sound like I didn't like it. It's just that annoying positive girl in me that never wants to think something bad is *really* going to happen.
That dream sounds beautiful and sad at the same time. As a child, I always dreamed I was plummetting from something. And would usually jar myself awake. I don't have those as an adult anymore. I guess I either landed or stopped walking close to the edge. That sounds depressing.
Reading the comments made me think of the black moments in Lisa Kleypas' Blue Eyed Devil. There was definitely more than one. Haven's tragic experience with her first husband was so powerful and it definitely changed everything. Sugar Daddy is the same way when a car accident turns Liberty's life in a new direction.
I need more little black moments. I'm going to have to think about this.
No. Not really. I usually make the decision I want to make regardless of the dream. But it's always interesting to see if I'll jump. Or if I'm holding someone's hand, if they will hold me back or jump with me. Only one person has jumped with me. And it wasn't Matty.
Wow. Speechless. Writeless. Witless.
I know Lis. That was by far one of the best black moments ever written. And the months on the page. Eeek!
Ter- I have another reoccuring dream that will be making it's way into DV. Another one of those flowy dress kind of dreams, but it involves a clearing and a pond and seeing your reflection but no one seeing you.
Reoccuring dreams are comforting to me. But I remember almost ever dream I have. I can still tell you in detail about my dream last night but it won't make sense. They never do unless you're there.
LK writes some beautiful black moments as well. I will agree with that. The black moment in BED was beyond words.
Maggie- Writeless and Witless? Wow, from me. I don't believe that.
I know you can write black moments. How is your MS coming along?
I usually remember my dreams too, Sin. Or something that happens during the day triggers me to remember. And they rarely make sense. They either reflect something I've been dealing with, something I'm missing or something I don't understand at all. Maybe I should start writing them down.
I like when I'm in a dream and it feels familiar and you realize in the middle of it all, you know what's going to happen. Or even in the middle of the day and something you do reminds you of something that happened during the night. Dreams are interesting. Maybe you should write them down for a week Ter and see if you've gotta pattern.
Sin - do you ever have Deja Vu from a dream? Used to happen all the time as a child and still every once in a while now. I'll be somewhere I've never been and realize I've seen the scene before, know exactly what someone is going to say to me. It used to creep me out but I'm used to it now.
I have plenty of journals in the nightstand. I'll have to try it.
I get deja vu a lot. I had it the other day when I was destroying backup CD's. I was reading something, and had a letter opener in my hand and I had the strangest wave of deja vu.
I was so drawn into that. Beautifully black.
I don't have a romantic black moment just yet. I'm working on a black moment but it's at the very beginning of my WIP and as I don't have much experience writing black moments I'm taking my time with this one.
Deja vu! I get it all the time and it's the weirdest feeling ever, sometimes making me wonder if I'm actually asleep dreaming about something I've already done. Cosmic!
Sin, this was a truly stirring blog post. I was waiting to see someone stop her or for her to wake up, but, I also wondered what she would feel when she hit bottom. Dark, sultry, and definitely paranormal.
I have dreams like this when I have choices to make or feel overwhelmed. Most involve water and usually my house has been flooded and I'm forced to save my children or find my way out like a good pirate would.
Kathy! Cosmic!
Why do I suddenly have the urge to get the decoder ring out and activate powers? LOL
You are a good pirate. If I ever was in trouble, I'd call on you and your pirate wielding ways!
Sin, I just finished one black moment, and I'm due to have another. I have about 25,000 words left. I'm so desperate to try to figure out where I should be going that I'm having a contest on my blog this week so somebody else can write the ending, LOL. I hope to see some of the Pirates (and virtually anybody else who might be reading this) take a stab with your cutlasses at my challenge!
SJ, you'll get there! Sometimes you just gotta let it go in order to write a black moment and not over think it. You're gonna do great!
Hm, very interesting Maggie. *scratching chin* I think I will have to take up that challenge!
To everyone- thank you so much for the wonderful comments on the blog today! I'm going to be on and off the computer for the rest of the afternoon/night, but I will try to respond later. :)
Maggie- what's your URL?
Here's the link, Kathy.
http://maggierobinsonmeansromance.blogspot.com/
Maggie's blogs are always great! And I'm working on that ending. LOL!
Thanks, Terrio! But we've so little to go on. That just doesn't vibe with me plotting rogue. Argh!
Yeah, I thought about sending in aliens or something for fun. But then I read the beginning she posted (http://beginasyoumeantogoon.blogspot.com/2007/10/mistress-by-midnight.html) and it's too good to parody or ruin with whatever I would come up with.
Not that she means to use it, but still. It's too good.
Evil genius. That's what you are, Maggie.
LOL!
Aww, blushing. Seriously---any and all ideas are welcome. I just want to have some fun and loosen up the jumble that is my mind. Yes to aliens, fruit loops,transvestites, etc.This way you are doing my procrastinating for me. Genius.
Wow, Sin! Awesome! Really pulled me in and, like Terri, didn't think she'd actually do it.
Black moments are the best, especially really well done ones. The ones that stick with me are several from SEP's books - Ain't She Sweet, It Had To Be You, Kiss An Angel, Heaven Texas - just to name a few. She writes the kind that while you're reading them you're getting very uncomfortable, start fidgeting and don't want to read on cause you can see what's coming and you can't believe she's actually going to take you there (kinda like your post!)
Irish - good answer! LOL! I'm still amazed at how much I cried during It Had To Be You. Gosh, that was a gusher.
I'm so slow on the uptake today. It's been a long day and I'm so sorry it took me so long to respond.
My hero/heroine have to overcome my hero's obsession with having his name cleared after society thinks he's killed his first wife.
Sin, this was beyond beautiful. It was like a moment out of my mind. I've seen myself there a million times but never had the courage to step off the cliff.
I live for black moments and a good cry. My WIP is set in 1604 and my heroine has been abused her entire life, she's never known love, never been able to trust, until she trusts my hero with her heart. But then he lies, out of necessity to save her life and she equates his betrayal with his lack of love, so when given the choice to stay with the hero or go home to her family, she goes home, thinking she never loved him he lets her go.
Gosh that sounds so unordinary and lame, I think I might have to change it to make it more unique.;)
Renee
Well, gosh, I'm not sure I can top this. It's pretty damn dark. I mean, she's kinda narrowed her options.
Good job, though!
OMG! Renee, that is extraordinary and as far from lame as you can get. I want to read that!! That's like angst from start to finish. How close is this to being finished?
*hint hint*
Wow! Powerful stuff, Sin!
The black moment that always amazes me is in Carla Kelly's Reforming Lord Ragsdale when the separation of Emma and Lord Ragsdale seems so final that the reader actually begins to doubt an HEA is possible.
The black moment in TLWH was one of those scenes that almost wrote itself. Dori hears a door close, a car drive away, and the pain of the choice she made is all-consuming. It's the only scene I wrote that made me cry.
Marn, it's okay hon. I'm usually MIA on your blog days. You have more important things to do, like finish your super awesome MS. :)
Irish! The best black moment, for me, are the ones that you can't believe what just happened. You never thought it would come down to that. I like surprise in my fiction. LOL And to be uncomfortable with my emotions and fidget. Those are the best.
Renee! It's amazing how many people dream the cliff but it's always different for everyone. I'm one of those people who likes a risk. I'll weigh my options first but I'll still jump. It usually takes someone holding me back to keep my from jumping off the deep end.
And I agree with Ter. That sounds so far from lame that I don't even have words for how much I'd be into that book!
Janga! Thank you! In my favorite black moments, you never know if there will be an HEA. And for me, the HEA isn't as necessary as a good story told the way it should be told. I know some people require a HEA but I love books that's willing to go out there on that limb.
Once again, thanks for all the great comments today!
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