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Monday, January 14, 2008
Don't Forget About the Twinkies!
I'm not a fan of oatmeal. Never have been: gluey, paste-colored stuff that could double as much for mortar as the breakfast of champions, but unfortunately, it's healthy. Loads of fiber, long lasting qualities, and less likely to cause jean shrinkage. Twinkies were more my gig as a kid. Light, fluffy, full of preservatives and sugar. No nutritional value whatsoever. Unfortunately, much more likely to cause jean shrinkage since it takes loads more Twinkies to equate to the fiber quality of a bowl of oatmeal. (But you can't say I didn't try.)
This is the parable of Oatmeal versus Twinkies.
Oatmeal is...what you should do; and Twinkies are...what you want to do but really doesn't show any obvious benefit in any way. But in the world of diets, there is room for both; and though the Twinkies must be moderated much more than oatmeal, there is something to be said for them.
So everyday, you're committed to your oatmeal, what must be done. Everything that must be done, and that includes prescribing to the best of all Nora Commandments: sit and write, regardless of Muse 'inspiration'. In this, the oatmeal is what we need. We need to sit and write, no matter what; God knows not everything you'll write will be brilliant. Or even remotely readable. But every day, you get up and eat your oatmeal. It's good for you and will contribute to an overall healthy life.
But don't forget about the Twinkies.
In moderation, a Twinkie now and again will contribute to your overall morale (God knows my morale is improved if I have a Twinkie to look forward to), and will make the oatmeal a bit easier to choke down in the morning. And what is it we want to do when faced with a story that won't write itself? What's our Twinkie? Yes--getting away from the computer.
Obviously getting away from your computer sounds counterproductive to writing your book--but that's where you're wrong. This is about inspiration. This is about FINDING your muse rather than waiting for it to return. Please note: getting away from the computer is different than just ignoring your laptop at home and watching North & South for the 100th time. Richard is not going to say anything new. Neither are your nearest and dearest--they're likely to just grunt, dirty up the dishes and throw underwear on the floor. Hardly conducive to writing about love and romance.
You're writing about the human experience, so you need to go out among other humans and experience it. Pretend it's an anthropology project and you're studying a new culture. Just exactly what sort of breed frequents Barnes & Noble and lurks at the Starbucks. Besides you, obviously. Or better, go somewhere outside your comfort zone and lurk and observe. Find that perfect bit of dialogue in someone else's conversation. Take a hike if your hero is a naturalist. Go to a bar and order a drink only your heroine would drink. If your heroine is organic and bit granola, go to the local farmer's market or natural whole-foods store--and buy something she'd eat. Take a walk in your character's shoes. Buy something that would be important to your character. Listen.
What I'm saying is: GET A LIFE. Or in the case of eavesdropping, pretend you're getting someone else's life.
The daily 8-5 is a drag. The pre-scheduled gym visits; the gripe sessions with the girls on Tuesday; the bedding down of Junior who insists on THREE bedtime stories *and* a drink of water--it's so routine. It's so easy, so tiring to be lost in the everyday and have nothing to write about. Even if you're just making it up. Even if this is the part of the day just for you. It's hard to be imaginative when the walls of your world are oatmeal colored day after day.
I'm not saying make some other commitment of time. Don't join the PTA or the Gardeners' Society, where you're made to suck out another 2-3 hours of your week to pacifying them. I'm saying take an hour to be invisible somewhere else, where the walls aren't oatmeal, where you might find some color to put on your blank page. Go out and enjoy your Twinkie.
How apparent is it to everyone Capt'n Hellion had nothing to write about? Who agrees CH needs to get a life? Who would like to send her more Twinkies? Who actually likes oatmeal? Who wishes I had used the Chocolate Cupcakes rather than the Twinkies?
This is the parable of Oatmeal versus Twinkies.
Oatmeal is...what you should do; and Twinkies are...what you want to do but really doesn't show any obvious benefit in any way. But in the world of diets, there is room for both; and though the Twinkies must be moderated much more than oatmeal, there is something to be said for them.
So everyday, you're committed to your oatmeal, what must be done. Everything that must be done, and that includes prescribing to the best of all Nora Commandments: sit and write, regardless of Muse 'inspiration'. In this, the oatmeal is what we need. We need to sit and write, no matter what; God knows not everything you'll write will be brilliant. Or even remotely readable. But every day, you get up and eat your oatmeal. It's good for you and will contribute to an overall healthy life.
But don't forget about the Twinkies.
In moderation, a Twinkie now and again will contribute to your overall morale (God knows my morale is improved if I have a Twinkie to look forward to), and will make the oatmeal a bit easier to choke down in the morning. And what is it we want to do when faced with a story that won't write itself? What's our Twinkie? Yes--getting away from the computer.
Obviously getting away from your computer sounds counterproductive to writing your book--but that's where you're wrong. This is about inspiration. This is about FINDING your muse rather than waiting for it to return. Please note: getting away from the computer is different than just ignoring your laptop at home and watching North & South for the 100th time. Richard is not going to say anything new. Neither are your nearest and dearest--they're likely to just grunt, dirty up the dishes and throw underwear on the floor. Hardly conducive to writing about love and romance.
You're writing about the human experience, so you need to go out among other humans and experience it. Pretend it's an anthropology project and you're studying a new culture. Just exactly what sort of breed frequents Barnes & Noble and lurks at the Starbucks. Besides you, obviously. Or better, go somewhere outside your comfort zone and lurk and observe. Find that perfect bit of dialogue in someone else's conversation. Take a hike if your hero is a naturalist. Go to a bar and order a drink only your heroine would drink. If your heroine is organic and bit granola, go to the local farmer's market or natural whole-foods store--and buy something she'd eat. Take a walk in your character's shoes. Buy something that would be important to your character. Listen.
What I'm saying is: GET A LIFE. Or in the case of eavesdropping, pretend you're getting someone else's life.
The daily 8-5 is a drag. The pre-scheduled gym visits; the gripe sessions with the girls on Tuesday; the bedding down of Junior who insists on THREE bedtime stories *and* a drink of water--it's so routine. It's so easy, so tiring to be lost in the everyday and have nothing to write about. Even if you're just making it up. Even if this is the part of the day just for you. It's hard to be imaginative when the walls of your world are oatmeal colored day after day.
I'm not saying make some other commitment of time. Don't join the PTA or the Gardeners' Society, where you're made to suck out another 2-3 hours of your week to pacifying them. I'm saying take an hour to be invisible somewhere else, where the walls aren't oatmeal, where you might find some color to put on your blank page. Go out and enjoy your Twinkie.
How apparent is it to everyone Capt'n Hellion had nothing to write about? Who agrees CH needs to get a life? Who would like to send her more Twinkies? Who actually likes oatmeal? Who wishes I had used the Chocolate Cupcakes rather than the Twinkies?
Labels:
Hellion needs a vacation,
no real topic,
oatmeal,
twinkies
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16 comments:
I actually started off my year with a Twinkie. No kidding. I can't remember the last time I had one so on my last trip back from Knoxville at the first of the year, I picked some up at a little convenience store. Gosh, those were good. I need to eat more Twinkies.
This is a great idea. One I hadn't thought about. My heroine is a hobby photographer and in one scene she takes pictures at the beach. I could do that.
Or my hero is a chef. I could...well, take a cooking class? Hmmm, I'll have to think of something else. Maybe go to one of those places where you can buy ready made meals and pick up something gourmet I could never make. That's an idea.
Oh, and I hate oatmeal. Never touch the stuff. Which explains my jean shrinkage...
I love Twinkies!
And my present to you wasn't Twinkies but now I'm rethinking it when I find you.
I like oatmeal but I'm a routine girl. I stick to my routine and the routine doesn't allow for oatmeal in the morning. It will allow for it at night but I don't feel like it at night. I feel like I need a box of Twinkies.
In honor of Ash, this year I'm asking my best friend to teach me everything she knows about guns. I now how to fire one. I know how to load one, but do I know how to take one apart, nope. Do I know what to do when it's jammed? Nope. So this year I will learn for Ash.
As for my heroine, she knows computers. And that's easy for me, because I know them too. But I might learn how to design a web page because that's going to be her day job.
Great ideas Hellion!
*makes note once again NOT to piss Sin off*
I actually like oatmeal. Are you going to kick me off the ship, Cap'n?
I do think it is important to indulge oneself from time to time, although my indulgence of choice would be a Little Debbie brownie. And I agree that time in the public world away from the writer's private world can yield unexpected dividends. I was sitting on a bench outside the library last week when a young woman walked by; as is typical of our student body, she had a cell phone attached to her ear. I heard her say, "I'm wearing this sexy, little black dress tonight, but I have no idea what to wear tomorrow night." I write down that sentence. It gave me the seed for a great scene that I would never have had if I had not been wasting time.
Don't worry, Janga, the brownie makes up for any error in food choice judgement.
That line has all kinds of possibilities but I would have ended it with "...but I'm not sure what to wear underneath." LOL!
I spent some time in a fast food restaurant editing during my lunch hour last week. It was the first time I had done that and I liked it. Something about doing the work with life buzzing around you that serves as inspiration or something.
I love Twinkies, and my perfect hero would eat Twinkies in bed with the perfect heroine...
I hate oatmeal, reminds me of eating wallpaper paste.
My hero is a landscape architech. I love to landscape, and that's one of the reasons I picked it as his occupation.
I haven't had a Twinkie in years. I think I should attempt it. I like the hostess twinkies that are coated in raspberry goo and coconuts too. Are they Twinkies or Twinkie rip offs? I digress....
I also despise oatmeal, but like oatmeal cookies. Does that count?
Anyway. I think that getting into your characters' lives is a great idea. And I'm probably a good candidate for the "get a life" advice. I wonder what my heroine would order at the bar?
Janga - great line!! Man, I wish people would say cool stuff like that around me. However, I spend most of my time with a one year old and there is a shortage of witty dialogue there.
Sorry, I'm an oatmeal eater too! I confess. Although, I do put lots of sugar and butter in it. Does that make it okay? I'm also not that fond of Twinkies, but could eat several packages of the Chocolate Cupcakes with the neat little white frosting design on top without blinking.
You are right about going out into the world and observing. It's a great resource. My hero is a divorced/widowed (haven't figured that part out yet) father of two. I find myself always staring at fathers and their kids while I'm out and about. It's fun to see how they all interact.
Janga, I'm thinking being on a college campus in and of itself has to provide for tons of great material! LOL
Funny, Irish, I do that too. Only for different reasons. *g*
And how could anyone not like Twinkies? But I can't touch those cupcakes. Only because the last thing I need is another chocolate addiction.
Terri - who swiped the last Hershey bar with caramel from the snack bar and hid it in her desk drawer.
I like oatmeal, with lots of cream, brown sugar and raisins, which kind of negates the whole healthy thing. And Twinkies are okay, but they're better coated with raspberry goo and coconut. I forget what they're called but they are industrial strength good. Oh, Zingers. Yikes, Marnee, I just read your post and we used the very same words to describe them. That is scary. Hostess Sno-balls are yummy too. I am starving.
Are the raspberry goo thingies different from the Sno-balls? That's what I thought of!
Irish, I prefer the chocolate cupcakes with the white spiral icing, but I wouldn't kick a Twinkie out of my bed. I like sucking the cream out. I'm weird, I know.
To all you oatmeal eaters: More power to you! I bet your arteries are squeaky clean! Good job! Marnee, I'm afraid the oatmeal cookies count, but nice try. I do like a butterscotchie now and again...the oatmeal and pecans and butterscotch chips. Yum And the dearth of witty dialogue in a 1 year old kid household made me laugh.
Janga--it's NEVER wasting time when you come away with a line like that!
Terri--write one erotica and suddenly you're turning every line into something naughty! *LOL*
I'm really glad I wasn't drinking anything when I read that "suck the cream out" bit. My keyboard would be fried. But I mess there wouldn't be any mess left. *g*
I'm afraid I turned everything naughty before. I'm the product of a very perverted family. It can't be helped. But it's good to have somewhere to focus it now. LOL!
Yeah, my next date is going to buy me a box of Twinkies, huh?
That's better than your next date BEING a box of Twinkies. Which is what my life is looking like. LOL!
*LOL* Nah, that's typically my Friday night...but I don't consider them a "date". *LOL*
OH, and to Irish who was fluxuating (sp?) between a widower and a divorcee--I vote widower. Okay, I have The Holiday on the brain, but damn, Jude Law made one sexy widower. Plus I don't think it's done all that often. It's easy to be better than a crazy, selfish ex-wife, but it's HARD to overcome a dead wife. Dead people automatically become NICER and you never speak ill of them--and eventually you generally remember them in a positive way. They become "perfect" and hard to live up to. After all, no one means to die--but a divorce, well, there's no escaping the blame there.
Ha! I think divorce is harder to overcome. And I *might* have some insider info on that. *cough*
It is hard to sort of *live up to* (pardon the pun) the dead wife but to gain the trust of a guy that has been big time messed with or hurt or just completely tortured, now that's hard.
Just my 2 cents...LOL!
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