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Our Lives Are Made In These Small Hours...
Ok, I'm not a huge Rob Thomas fan, but DS was watching "Meet the Robinsons" this week (Ok, I was watching it and he was disregarding it pretty thoroughly, whatever, if I can't use my one and a half year old for an excuse to watch Disney movies...) and this song is on the soundtrack.
It made me question the way I have been viewing the process of writing.
This time, while I float in unpublished obscurity, is a gift. These "small hours" while I ply away at my craft, while I stretch my creative wings, will shape the artist I hope to be one day. And while I crave publication and the opportunity for others to read the characters I've come to love so desperately, this time is mine.
I write now for myself. Each twist of phrase that feels “just right” is mine. Each chuckle or tear I shed is mine. Selfish but there is something heady about writing for oneself.
There’s only one time to finish that first book, there’s only this time of being unfettered by expectations. I’m not saying I won’t or we shouldn’t keep moving forward, I only mean that we should find joy in the entire process, that each step is its own reward.
All the pressure, all the anxiety, all those self-doubts. We need to just “let it roll right off our shoulder” because when we publish “we’ll only just remember how it feels.” These small hours when we weren’t published are an experience we'll never forget.
So tell me, have you had any inspirational epiphanies recently? Let’s shore up the old confidence today. What’s the best bit of encouragement you can offer us or the best bit of advice you've been given?
Books by the Crew
39 comments:
Whenever I read these blogs I keep seeing analogies with scientific research.
When you start in research you might be asked to study something odd in nature, something that doesn't fit the general pattern (idea for a story). Soon you have a glimmer of an explanation and some theoretical ideas (plot). As these ideas develop, the excitement grows. For a while you might be the only person in the world who understands what's going on (the small hours). For a while you keep the ideas secret with your supervisor, while you play and perfect your work (enjoying being unpublished). Finally in a state of nervous anticipation you submit for publication, for peer review, revealing all, both work and soul to the rest of the world.
Here the path splits.
One road leads to heaven, acceptance for publication,acceptance by the wider community, a successful career, personal requests for reprints, other scientists you admire quoting your work. Over the horizon of this road lies the nirvana of a Nobel prize.
The other road leads to hell. The paper is rejected. No one believes your theory. Your career is in tatters before it got of the ground.
The pain of rejection and failure must be excruciating, but there is always hope. There are many examples where a paper was rejected, only to rise again from the ashes when some new evidence confirmed its validity. Then the joy must be out of this world. Proving the doubters wrong. Villain turned hero.
Much the same with writing I think. Its the way of the world!
Nice blog Marnee
I think you are channeling Bookends today! They have a lovely blog on pulling yourself out of the mucky tar of this business.
My motto, these days, is writing is about rewriting. I'm not fighting, per se, my book, but things are still working themselves out. And this saying just seems apropo. Sometimes I have to remind myself that this career path is a constant learning curve. When you stop learning, there will be nothing to gain. Writing is rewriting is my only constant epiphany.
The best advice comes from both writers and non-writer friends of mine... Keep writing. because to do so, means you are willing to keep learning.
Q - It is the way of the world. Ups and downs, hard work and goals/dreams and the uphill battle to accomplish them. And of course you'd connect it with science. LOL!! :)
Tiff - Writing is Rewriting is a great motto. And so incredibly true. Finishing the book is just the beginning it seems. LOL!! It is a huge learning process. I'm amazed at how much a person can learn by just doing it.
Awesome advice, Marnee! LOL about Rob Thomas. My daughter just discovered him and I have been listening to his many songs (solo and with Matchbox 20) via YouTube for the past several weeks.
It's great advice for writers but I think as I was watching the video I took away the parent and friendship aspect of it. Lately I've been very focused on the present. Not dwelling on the past and not looking toward the future - just savoring what is happening now, today! It is a bit of a change for me and I'm liking it.
I've been one of those parents sitting in the bleachers watching my son pitch his first inning, which lasted for at least an hour I'm sure! LOL I think he walked every kid on the other team. Then watching him again a couple of years later strike 3 kids out in a row, catch a line drive back to him on the mound to get the batter out and spin around and get the second base runner out - all in the same game. Talk about a euphoric feeling. Quiet little Irish was screaming her fool head off in the stands!
I'm savoring my day to day accomplishments and little miracles and finding my life feels more satisfying than it has in a long time!
PS, go little Irish! I'll be watching for him on the MLB rosters in years to come. (GO Phillies!!)
Irish - I think this is a feel good song. It really is the small things, the day to day things, that make life the most fulfilling.
This week, when DS wakes up for the day or from a nap he calls for me. "Maaaaa.... Ma MA!!" And he keeps going until I get him. It was one of those breakthroughs, him knowing that I'm nearby instead of screaming in terror at being alone, that made me just burst with pride.
Little things, ya know?
BTW - I forgot to mention I like Tiff's advice!
To be able to put words on paper that touch even one person's heart is a gift, and all of us have the very real possibility to reaching hundreds, if not thousands of readers someday.
When you combine that with the satisfaction of claiming a creation all our own (with proper kudos to fabulous CP's, of course), then hey--what's not to be pumped up about? We're all going to be the 5% who finish the book and make the sale....Celebrate!
Gillian - Hear hear! *raising my bottle of rum and drinking lustily*
Sheesh, 5% for real?
My allergies must be acting up today. *dabs at watering eyes with skull covered hanky*
I love this song, but then I love everything Rob Thomas does. And I think I needed this reminder today. My brain is always looking to the future. I'm always living for what is to come and fail to focus on the present. My present is pretty good right now, but worry about what will happen in the next couple of months is keeping me from enjoying it. I need to stop worrying. Easier said than done.
For me, the best advice has been that "vomit out the first draft" thing. And I repeat it as often as possible. As for mottos, I'm partial to Marn's - Just keep swimming!
Great blog Marnee! I've never thought of it this way, but you're right that we'll never get back these "early years." How great will it be to all meet up at Nationals in twenty years and say "Remember back before we were published...." And we can smile at all the first-timers who nervously clutch precious manuscript pages to their chest and look around with wide eyes and say to them, "Ahh, enjoy this time."
Irish - what great advice! I need to remember that!
Frankly, I'm impressed Marnee figured out how to imbed the video. All the pirates are bowing to you!
Best advice: Mark Twain.
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.
I know that every writer should know the business side of things; however, I think at first, you're better off with the "ignorance is bliss" motif. You're writing happily, pleasing yourself and imagining pleasing everyone else, growing more confident in your abilities and learning to recognize your weaknesses. It's your first, only, real chance to learn to trust yourself. Critique Partners are worth their weight in gold-platinum-and-pultonium, but it's your voice that needs to be trusted most. And I think that's what's discovered when you're first writing.
Ter - LOL!! Must just be that time of the year, I was feeling a little watery eyed last night.... LOL!!
I'm glad my motto helps you. :) It's helped me be productive, though we'll see if it gets me to publication. LOL!!
Hal - I can't wait for that Nationals reunion either. :)
Q - Your comment reminded me of something I learned in that science class I took recently. I know, you're likely as shocked as I am that I remembered something. Well, I only remember part of it. I can't remember the man's name, but he's the one who figured out that you could put patients to sleep in order to operate on them. Until that point, all operations were done with the patient wide awake. He faced a huge amount of resistence and it took his methods years to be accepted, but where would we be if he hadn't kept pushing through all the rejection and ridicule?!
Just goes to show, rejections should never stop you from doing what you know you can do.
Hellion - I would love to take credit for figuring out the video thing but it was Sin who did it. She's the blog guru, I merely bow to her brilliance. LOL!! And I love that saying by Twain. In fact, I love most of what Twain said.
Voice is so important. Whenever I start to doubt it, I take a break. Writing without it clear in my mind is futile.
I think that's why my blogs bother me, my voice doesn't come through at all. I promise, my voice is not nearly as meandering and pointless and dull as my blogs. I wish I could get it in there.
Love the Mark Twain bit. And I meant to give Marn (and Sin) kudos for getting the video in here. I'm sure I'd have never figured it out.
You have a voice, Ter. You just can't see or hear it because it's yours!
And Hellion, I'm sure I can speak for the DH here when I say thank you for the Mark Twain quotes. Ever since you posted those Mark Twain quotes (either here or on your blog) he's been sticking them at the bottom of his signature line at work. The man had so many quotable quotes! LOL His current one - "Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it time to pause and reflect."
It musta been fate that I signed online last night to check my email before I checked out for the night. I couldn't just leave y'all hanging. Not that I knew what I was doing. I just don't have a fear of pushing buttons. LOL Now if only I could get the instructions to work right on how to do it so we can all add another element to our blogs.
I'm not much of a Rob Thomas fan either but his song, "Now Comes the Night" is one of my favorite songs. I listen to it all the time. I think it's been played something like 200 times in my iTunes list, which doesn't happen for many songs. I like my variety but sometimes my inspiration is to listen to the same song over and over again. Lack of confidence seems to get me while I'm in the beginning. I'm never sure of my direction and I tend to wander but once I get past those first few chapters, time flies for me. I just need to get back to remembering that.
Having just finished my first wip, for the second time, this blog couldn't have been more timely. It's difficult to think that you've accomplished anything at all when there is still so much to do.
I do not know why I ever banish myself to the cave, when it's perfectly wonderful here.
Marn, my fam has been going through a difficult time (nasty custody battle over precious niece, whose momma looks to be a meth addict, and that is the least of it) and the Rob Thomas video has reminded me just how precious life is.
Quantam, do you have your own blog somewhere to explain scientific theories in human form? You have a way of explaining that I scientifically challenged that I am, understand. Right now, I'm trying to read Cohen's The Birth of a New Physics, trying.
Hellion, love Mark Twain.
My best advice-keep writing, never give up!
Renee
Great blog, Marn! I LOVE that song. Tiffany's advice is wonderful and 100% true.
Ter gave me some advice recently. She said," Vomit it out!" Meaning I should just push right through my story and not edit or even look back at what I've written.
(As an aside, I have a sign saying "VOMIT IT OUT!" hanging over my computer now.lol:))
Ter - I agree with Irish; you definitely have a voice and it comes through loud and clear. :)
Sin - Many many gracious thanks for the video assist. :) And I completely concur with the slow beginning. I am like that too. And Slow middle. The end was quick though. LOL!! Hopefully the next one will be faster.
See, I said I've been repeating it. And thanks to our wonderful guest bloggers (both from Captain's neck of the woods) for giving me that great advice in the first place.
Thanks, Irish. Good to know there's something there I'm not seeing...errr....hearing.
Renee - congrats on finishing again! :) I'm sorry to hear about your family. During hard times it really is important to remember that life is so precious and we should really embrace each moment.
Kel - I am a student of the vomit it out school of thought myself, though I admit that I edit a bit as I go. Usually when I finish a chapter I read over it once before I move on, just to catch any big flubs. But just once. I stop myself from any further adjustments because that stops the flow of the vomit.
It is bad to stop the flow of the vomit.lol.But it's so HARD to not look back. I have-occasionally, mind you-looked back...:)
Shh.... Kelly, it's our little secret (that you get to share with all of us here... and our lurkers... and will remain on the internet for all of posterity...)
Well, if there is anything to be said for my neck of the woods, it's our Culture and Class, baby.
Clearly, cap'n, clearly.
Hehehe...that's pretty much what we're known for on this ship too, isn't it?
Really? I thought it was our cheeky wit and sassy repartee.
I stand corrected.
That's a beautiful and very pure way of looking at your process, Marn. Congratulations and enjoy it.
Thanks JK. :)
Great song, Marnee. I've come to look at each moment with more focus since almost dying last April. Did push me to wake up and get going...so I'm not wasting time anymore moments on the entire episode.
And writing itself is the gift. When I started, I just wanted to tell myself a story...and it got longer and longer and longer and suddenly, I had several stories, book lengths. I didn't realize how much I treasured what I was finding in myself until those characters found a HEA and I cried. And cried, for days! I didn't want to leave them!
So I didn't. Found a way to keep going. And I kept going without pause until I started thinking about publishing... Hellion? You're right. Ignoranc is bliss.
Went to my first conference, RT in Pittsburgh and after a week of "advice" I thought of going back home and just forgetting about it...didn't last, but man! I was overwhelmed. Took a while to find my voice again.
So, yeah, enjoy the moments where it all flows free. And screw the rules. They're just guidelines, anyway!
Women who behave seldom make history.
I loved this blog, Marnee! I came here fresh from reading the same-old same old from the HAPs (Historically Accurate Police), this time complaining about a book they haven't even read. Your blog was a lovely antidote to that negativism.
I love the song too. And, Irish, It's encuraging to know those long games get better. :)
As for writing advice, one bit I keep on my desk since I have to apply it regularly is Faulkner's "Kill your darlings." One piece that seems appropriate to today's theme is from Elizabeth Berg: "Try to find your richest joy and satisfaction in the writing itself. Let the rest be gravy. Good gravy, but gravy.
--Escaping into the Open
Terri,
I'm not sure that anyone in particular gets credit for inventing anaesthetic. Its sort of evolved. Started with chloroform and laughing gas, developing to the highly sophisticated modern techniques. Even the local anaesthetics are brilliant these days, though I sometimes think that we should be able to endure a little pain at the dentists occasionally!
Actually the theory of global anaesthetics is closely tied to understanding consciousness which is a big research topic these days. Stuart Hameroff (an anaesthesiologist) discusses some of the issues on his web site, though some of it can get a bit technical.
A good teacher should first get to know his students. In your case the science lectures should have started with acoustics and music with lots of examples from current albums *g*
Renee,
Afraid I don't have a web site. I make the excuse of too busy, but really I'm a bit lazy about things other than my research!
I don't know the book that you mention, and Cohen is a common name in science. On the whole scientists have been quite bad at describing the subject for the intelligent lay person, though some top scientists do a good job. I think Steven Weinberg (the field theorist) wrote an excellent popular book on cosmology ('The first three minutes' ) and Paul Davies has written a number of good popular books. Then of course there is Stephen Hawking who's books look good on the book shelves but are rarely read from cover to cover. Afraid none of them bring out the romance of science!
If you have anything specific, then I'll be glad to help out, with a more romantic perspective if I can. :D
Janga
Love the Elizabeth Berg quote. Though having a sweet tooth I prefer 'the icing on the cake' :lol:
Great blog topic... Let the moment linger, like good chocolate. Yes.
I've always loved "Women who behave seldom make history." But I don't know who said it! Dang. It inspires me to just go for it.
Thanks Janga! :) Kill your darlings is great advice. I've been trying to do that for the last month. It is hard for a fledgling author to get rid of those bits we love so much that really shouldn't be there.
Oh, 2nd, I think it was Eleanor Roosevelt. And I love that saying. :) So true, ya know? Break out and live on the wild side.
It's funny Janga, I was telling the DH the other day that my whole perspective on their sports life has changed. Especially in the cold weather. I used to sit in the car with the heater running watching from the parking lot and now I have to be in the stands just in case!! :)
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