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Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Chemistry 101
Music of the week is, "What Do I Have to Do" by Stabbing Westward.
"Indifference is the strongest force in the universe. It makes everything it touches meaningless. Love and hate don't stand a chance against it." Joan Vinge
Let me just get this out there. The only chemistry I know is what happens between two characters destined for their paths to intersect in one mind blowing moment. There is nothing scientific about this blog. No one in their right mind would say I qualify to talk about science. I barely made it out of Biology II. It might be because I was busy reading a romance novel propped inside of my biology book instead of paying attention but my only saving grace is that I know worms are hermaphrodites and therefore blew the teacher's mind when I actually answered one question in class.
Chemistry for a writer is a tricky thing to get right.
Confession number one of my chemistry lesson: Kiki and I are struggling.
Let me explain. Kiki was my first original character ever written. In the beginning, Kiki and I fought over what her real story should be. Kiki believes that I should allow her to be a con-artist. She's comfortable with the amount of indifference you need to feel when gaming a target. She comfortable with the fact that on an entirely different level of emotional deadening, she never allows herself to react to a situation with emotion only cold detachment. This allows Kiki to move about life without really ever living it. The very thought of facing down her emotions is more daunting than facing down the barrel of a gun.
My issue is as a writer is writing a character with the kind of cool detachment Kiki's has obtained makes it very difficult to write about chemistry and keep it well within her character bounds. Kiki's journey throughout the books will be a wider arc than Sadie's emotional arc. Sadie's not lacking in emotional outpouring. Sadie's been locked in a padded cell for ten years. All she had to keep her company was the safety of her emotions and even those she couldn't trust. So when it comes to writing Sadie, she has all these emotions that pour out all at once. She doesn't know how to process them or compartmentalize or even stop herself from irrational behavior.
Confession number two of my chemistry lesson: Once upon a time Sadie and Kiki were the same character and now split because of emotional differences. Sometimes I wish my emotional split was just as easy.
Sadie's emotional journey into chemistry with another character will be a journey of self exploration into her character growing up. Sadie is 26 going on 16. She never attended co-ed slumber parties and played 7 minutes in heaven. She didn't go to homecoming or prom. And this day and age, it's hard to write a modern character who is not only an emotional virgin, but save one moment in the bed of a pickup is pretty much starting from the ground up physically. She's unsure of herself. Unsure of how she feels. Unsure how to trust someone and will probably just jump off the cliff without looking over the edge first. Kiki, on the other hand, refuses to have any emotional attachment to anyone who could mean something to her. Kiki is hell bent on closing herself off from the world forever.
Realistically, Kiki is in love with this guy whom she's loved since she was seventeen. She would rather die than admit it. In fact, they had one night together that really showed her how much she loved him and how dangerous he really was to her and ever since she's kept him at arm's distance. This is the first chance I'm really having to write a male character other than Alpha and I'm enjoying it a bit. Kiki is a little too dominant to end up with another alpha. He needs to know when to take charge and when to take a step back and let her lead. The emotion between them is the hardest part to write. First person POV allows for you to only know how Kiki's feeling, and not allowing for the intimate connection between them to boil out of control. You'd never know when they are together that she feels anything more than friendship between them. Emotionally its difficult for him to take but he knows if he pushes her, she will only push him further away.
There is a plus side to all this emotional drama. Usually chemistry and emotion can be separated. And for me, showing Kiki the difference is going to make my day. I'm going to drag her into a relationship, leading her specifically with the chemistry she can't get away from, and then she's going to realize that she's in too deep with him. Slow and steady with Kiki. Catching her off guard is the hardest part. Inside, she's so in tune to any slight change on her emotional behavior towards someone. No move is miscalculated- the chess game without the chess board.
And confession number three of my chemistry lesson: It starts with a look.
Not just any look. I'm not talking about the sex eyes from across the room. Any fool can do that. There is this moment that two people can share when your eyes meet for just a brief second. It's one of those looks that passes a million conversations in a single blink. I like to think it's your heart recognizing its other half. But that's way too romantic for truly what the look represents. The look represents the chemistry founded between two able bodies. It's the look that makes your heart race uncontrollably and your lips to part. Breathing becomes difficult and a faint tint of pink hints on your cheeks. In a single second, a look can remind you of everything you want and everything you need. Reminding you of what you're missing and compelling you to go after it.
Showing that to a character makes all the world of difference and it's hard not to think about the possibilities. Chemistry is that want and need, the pure desire to feel something with another person. It's often that that chemistry you have for someone leads into something more emotional if you allow it. (And often you don't allow it and it happens anyway. Because let's face it, we can't control our emotions. We like to think we can, but it's a shallow attempt of wasted energy on the inevitable.)
So today, let's talk about feeling chemistry and writing chemistry. What is the best attempt at chemistry between two characters you've read recently (or in the past)? And what is your favorite scene of chemistry you like to write?
"Indifference is the strongest force in the universe. It makes everything it touches meaningless. Love and hate don't stand a chance against it." Joan Vinge
Let me just get this out there. The only chemistry I know is what happens between two characters destined for their paths to intersect in one mind blowing moment. There is nothing scientific about this blog. No one in their right mind would say I qualify to talk about science. I barely made it out of Biology II. It might be because I was busy reading a romance novel propped inside of my biology book instead of paying attention but my only saving grace is that I know worms are hermaphrodites and therefore blew the teacher's mind when I actually answered one question in class.
Chemistry for a writer is a tricky thing to get right.
Confession number one of my chemistry lesson: Kiki and I are struggling.
Let me explain. Kiki was my first original character ever written. In the beginning, Kiki and I fought over what her real story should be. Kiki believes that I should allow her to be a con-artist. She's comfortable with the amount of indifference you need to feel when gaming a target. She comfortable with the fact that on an entirely different level of emotional deadening, she never allows herself to react to a situation with emotion only cold detachment. This allows Kiki to move about life without really ever living it. The very thought of facing down her emotions is more daunting than facing down the barrel of a gun.
My issue is as a writer is writing a character with the kind of cool detachment Kiki's has obtained makes it very difficult to write about chemistry and keep it well within her character bounds. Kiki's journey throughout the books will be a wider arc than Sadie's emotional arc. Sadie's not lacking in emotional outpouring. Sadie's been locked in a padded cell for ten years. All she had to keep her company was the safety of her emotions and even those she couldn't trust. So when it comes to writing Sadie, she has all these emotions that pour out all at once. She doesn't know how to process them or compartmentalize or even stop herself from irrational behavior.
Confession number two of my chemistry lesson: Once upon a time Sadie and Kiki were the same character and now split because of emotional differences. Sometimes I wish my emotional split was just as easy.
Sadie's emotional journey into chemistry with another character will be a journey of self exploration into her character growing up. Sadie is 26 going on 16. She never attended co-ed slumber parties and played 7 minutes in heaven. She didn't go to homecoming or prom. And this day and age, it's hard to write a modern character who is not only an emotional virgin, but save one moment in the bed of a pickup is pretty much starting from the ground up physically. She's unsure of herself. Unsure of how she feels. Unsure how to trust someone and will probably just jump off the cliff without looking over the edge first. Kiki, on the other hand, refuses to have any emotional attachment to anyone who could mean something to her. Kiki is hell bent on closing herself off from the world forever.
Realistically, Kiki is in love with this guy whom she's loved since she was seventeen. She would rather die than admit it. In fact, they had one night together that really showed her how much she loved him and how dangerous he really was to her and ever since she's kept him at arm's distance. This is the first chance I'm really having to write a male character other than Alpha and I'm enjoying it a bit. Kiki is a little too dominant to end up with another alpha. He needs to know when to take charge and when to take a step back and let her lead. The emotion between them is the hardest part to write. First person POV allows for you to only know how Kiki's feeling, and not allowing for the intimate connection between them to boil out of control. You'd never know when they are together that she feels anything more than friendship between them. Emotionally its difficult for him to take but he knows if he pushes her, she will only push him further away.
There is a plus side to all this emotional drama. Usually chemistry and emotion can be separated. And for me, showing Kiki the difference is going to make my day. I'm going to drag her into a relationship, leading her specifically with the chemistry she can't get away from, and then she's going to realize that she's in too deep with him. Slow and steady with Kiki. Catching her off guard is the hardest part. Inside, she's so in tune to any slight change on her emotional behavior towards someone. No move is miscalculated- the chess game without the chess board.
And confession number three of my chemistry lesson: It starts with a look.
Not just any look. I'm not talking about the sex eyes from across the room. Any fool can do that. There is this moment that two people can share when your eyes meet for just a brief second. It's one of those looks that passes a million conversations in a single blink. I like to think it's your heart recognizing its other half. But that's way too romantic for truly what the look represents. The look represents the chemistry founded between two able bodies. It's the look that makes your heart race uncontrollably and your lips to part. Breathing becomes difficult and a faint tint of pink hints on your cheeks. In a single second, a look can remind you of everything you want and everything you need. Reminding you of what you're missing and compelling you to go after it.
Showing that to a character makes all the world of difference and it's hard not to think about the possibilities. Chemistry is that want and need, the pure desire to feel something with another person. It's often that that chemistry you have for someone leads into something more emotional if you allow it. (And often you don't allow it and it happens anyway. Because let's face it, we can't control our emotions. We like to think we can, but it's a shallow attempt of wasted energy on the inevitable.)
So today, let's talk about feeling chemistry and writing chemistry. What is the best attempt at chemistry between two characters you've read recently (or in the past)? And what is your favorite scene of chemistry you like to write?
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Quartermaster's Queries (Sin),
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113 comments:
I recently found a spot with two characters very much like Kiki and her significant other, where Ivy watched Duran and suddenly...felt that pull. I call it the onset of magnetism. He always knew it was there, like Kiki's guy, he knew he couldn't push Ivy or she'd just take off, deny it all.
I really like this scene. But you are right, it is hard to go on from that place. To figure out how to make it real for Ivy to open up to what Duran means to her.
It really challenges me, but I think it's going to be fun to figure this out!
Sin darling
You've floored me again with this emotional stuff, shoulders are not quite on the mat yet though, and I'm fighting back. As long as you don't kiss me senseless I'm gonna get on top of this!
To really understand emotions I think I would need to do some controlled experiments. Try to keep everything constant and then vary one ingredient at a time to observe the effect.
If we think of the emotional landscape as a surface, there will be hills and valleys, grassy planes and jagged rocks.
Someone in free fall, just letting it happen, will take the path of least resistance and end up in a valley which may not be ideal. It may be filled with jagged rocks.
Bliss is to be found in the deepest valley, the one with sparkling mineral water, grassy banks, beautiful trees with birds and butterflies, and gorgeous vistas in all directions. To get there you may have to climb out of your present unsatisfactory valley, ie dump the guy, and climb over high mountains to try again.
It can be a long path if you are unlucky but if you persist you will eventually find the way.
Now a more detailed understanding of chemistry may reveal some short cuts. The existence of catalysts can speed up the process. With some advanced theory it may be possible to tunnel through the barriers. Thats how I found my true love.
But thats another lesson! *grin*
Inspirational as always Sin. :D
Sin, this is brilliant, lovie.
Kiki sounds like a lot of fun. Are Kiki and Sadie in the same book or no?
Read recently? Ummmm... I just read Lover Avenged this past week and it was fabulous. (Was a little concerned after Lover Enshrined but this one, so much better). And I think that the connection between Ehlena and Rehv was really well done. And I can't wait CAN'T WAIT for John Matthews' story. I *heart* him.
As for what I like to write? I love writing that scene where the hero or heroine really gets their counterparts attention. In my current, Nik saves Sarah from being kidnapped and he thinks she's unremarkable. Normal hair, height, thin build, whatever. Normal. But then she tilts her head back and she has these incredibly big beautiful blue eyes and this lush mouth. And he's lost.
*grin* I think Q is flabbergasted that I am emotional and think all these emotional things.
MM, I like that... magnetism. Where they just move together whether they want to or not. The ride you and I will take to get Kiki and Ivy to the place where they need to be to really start their emotional journey is going to be fun. You'll have to keep me posted.
I know how I'm going to get Kiki to realize that she's messing up her life. That's always the easy part for me. I just start picking people off.
Oh Q, my wicked darling English gentleman. *sigh* Kissing you senseless is not my secret weapon.
I love this poetic description of theory this morning. I find it very true. Finding that love is finding an oasis in the usual everyday muck. All I can imagine from your description is what I'd imagine the hills of Ireland to look like.
And really there are no shortcuts in love- unless you're kidnapping her and running off. And then it has to be like Cam and Amelia in Mine Til Midnight.
Marn, brilliant? Are you sure you didn't hit your head this morning? Get headbutted or something? LOL
Kiki and Sadie are in the same book series. At first it was going to be two separate series' but it makes more sense to have them together. They are both first person POV's within the book.
I really enjoyed Lover Avenged. I didn't think that I would. In fact, I boycotted reading it because everyone knows I love Rehv. But John Matthew's story should be pretty good. I have a girl crush on Xhex, so for her emotional journey to finally play out will be really good for the books.
So, can you tell me more about my other girl crush, Ice?
LOL! You're going to hate on me, but I had to cut out Ice's POV from this book. So she's just surly in other people's POV. I still have her and Marc planned for next. I don't think you've read any of Marc's POV though, yet, but he's perfect for her, I think. I should send you my two favorite scenes with them. I think that story's going to be fun to write. (But I am in the last 1/3 of my story so I'm guessing it might be grass is greener stuff).
And I like Xhex too, though I've read some people online who don't.
LOL. Hater.
I love Ice. I'll take whatever I can get of her. I can't wait to read her WHOLE book. I will need it signed of course. LOL
I like Xhex because she's hard core. She never pretends to be anything she's not, but I have a feeling when I talk about huge emotional struggles to change, Xhex is going to take the cake.
I love me some Ice too, honestly. And Marc.... I love him too. I can't wait to plot their story out.
I read an interview where Ward said that Lover Mine is going to break our hearts. I can completely believe it.
I love this blog and I can't believe it, but Q's comment is making total sense to me. From the changing one variable to a catalyst to speed things along. That's exactly how to write a story!
I'm reading Tessa's GODDESS OF THE HUNT right now and you want to talk chemistry. Holy Toledo is there chemistry. Jeremy is as you describe, Sin. He's cut off all emotion and attachment due to something that happened in the past. But Lucy makes him feel and it drives him mad that he can't fight it. Or walk away from her. The pull is palpable on every page.
I'm not sure my characters have chemistry yet. They have an attraction and they argue quite a bit, but I'm just getting to the part where things start to move in a more positive direction. About to turn on the magnet, to use Chance's word. I'll have to amp up the chemistry in the next pass.
Anyone created two characters and tried to put them together but realized there was just no chemistry between them?
Maybe we should have Q talk chemistry to us all the time. *g*
I can't wait to get my hands on Tessa's book!
And yes, sometimes no matter what you try to do, you can't get two characters to have any desire for one another. It's happened to me before. Like Ruiz and Sadie. Once Sadie split from Kiki's personality, Ruiz is just too much for her. But not too much for Kiki.
Marn, I so can't wait to read this!
I hate when books break my heart. Lover Eternal did that. I just could NOT stop crying in that book. I'm almost embarrassed to admit that.
I cried in Lover Eternal too. LOL! Something about how big and tough Rhage is.... Love him. Still love him when I read him in the stories.
I know. It's hard not to love him. And there are just all these heart breaking moments in that book that makes it nearly impossible to get through it without shedding a few tears in the process.
Lover Eternal was my first BDB book and it's always been my favorite. A close second is Z's book.
I love both of those. They're my two favorites too.
And Z's book? When she returns to tell him she's pregnant and he's all, I wanted to fix myself... and he's this big guy now, but still all uncomfortable in his skin around her, as if nothing is going to make him feel like he deserves her.... I bawled there too...
Yeah, I bawled about that too. Z's book was really hard to read as well and I knew it would be.
"There is this moment that two people can share when your eyes meet for just a brief second. It’s one of those looks that passes a million conversations in a single blink. I like to think it’s your heart recognizing its other half. But that’s way too romantic for truly what the look represents. The look represents the chemistry founded between two able bodies...In a single second, a look can remind you of everything you want and everything you need. Reminding you of what you’re missing and compelling you to go after it."
I swear that's the best thing I've ever read of yours, Sin, and keep in mind, I loved your new opening to where Sadie meets Ash. *LOL*
My favorite scene of chemistry to write is when I have two different characters and they reach that moment where they share a moment in common. I think the key to successful relationships is not focusing on the things that are different, what he does that makes you crazy, but focusing on the things you share, the things that drew you to each other before you realized it was those things drawing you to each other. I like to try to write those moments.
In books--okay in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (stop your groaning!), Harry and Ron rescue Hermione from a Mountain Troll--and Hermione lies to the teachers to keep them out of trouble. It was their little bonding experience; I remember them exchanging looks and Harry realizing that their relationships had changed--that they had all now become friends.
I'm trying to think of romance novels. I know I've read those moments--not the Lover books--but others. I think I'm going to have to take up Janga's technique of writing down books I've read and rating them and jotting down pertinent fact. "Chemistry sizzling, plot mediocre, hero HAWT." Stuff like that--just so I can answer questions on the blog. *LOL*
That's a high compliment, Hellie, considering you've read nearly everything I've ever written.
There is no exchanging of looks between Ash and Sadie in the beginning. There is a transfer of aggravation between them. LOL
Oh, I know, but it was such a damned funny scene that it was easily my favorite thing you've written. I love to laugh, you know.
Although the scene with Ruiz in a towel and the pancakes...that was a really good scene too. That needs to go somewhere.
I know. I have trouble remembering back to all the books I've read and which ones affected me emotionally and which ones affected me temperature wise. LOL
And you're really good at those moments, so you should love to write them.
I still have hopes that I can put in the scene with Ruiz and the pancakes. It might have to be with Kiki though instead of Sadie. Sadie's not quite jaded enough for the likes of Ruiz.
I'm definitely going to have to start keeping lists of what I've read. I read a Nicole Jordan book last week where the hero kept sneaking into the heroine's bedchamber to wait for her. And each time, you just *knew* he was in there. It would be totally pitch black and silent, but you just knew he was watching her. Amazing chemistry (she knew it too, obviously). And in context, it wasn't nearly so creepy and stalkerish as I just made it sound *g*
I have one of those emotionally distant heroines, and it's much harder to write than I expected. I want to write with this deep POV, really digging into her emotions, but she just doesn't give a shit.
Hal! *LOL* Isn't it funny the sorts of plot devices we love in our romance novels but if a man actually did that sort of thing to us in real life, we'd probably have him sent to jail?
Actually that reminds me of Blast from the Past--did anyone see that movie besides me? I love Brendan Fraser. Anyway, he's lived underground for 35 years and he's basically caught in a time warp. He's NICE, polite, geniune, helpful, and sweet. Nothing manipulative about him; doesn't get sarcasm. The most unjaded man ever. He meets Eve, his complete opposite--but then she hasn't had the benefit of living in a time warp for 35 years. She's had to date in the 20th century. So when he finally confesses how he grew up, she naturally thinks he's crazy and has his taken away to a mental institution. She and her roommate go to his hotel to collect his things, and they realize He wasn't kidding. He was in a bomb shelter--and basically raised in a time warp--and he wasn't crazy. He really was just that geniune, polite, sweet and romantic. Eve is sitting on the bed with her roommate--and the roommate says, "Eve, a man walks into your life who is the richest, kindest, most capable man you've ever met..." "And I had him committed." "Yes, yes, you did."
However, if a sexy hot Johnny Depp clone wanted to break into my bedroom at night and watch me in the dark, I'd be all over it.
You mean all over him. LOL!
I could say I can't remember which books have amazing chemistry, but then that's redundant. I'll think harder.
*scribbling notes* MUST pick up Nicole Jordan. Ugh, I need someone to follow behind me and remind me of everything I want and need to do.
And Hellie, I've seen Blast From the Past. It's one of mama's favorite movies.
Hal, that's another problem. The character who is not only stubborn but really just doesn't give a shit to care.
I love that scene from that movie Hellie. "You had him committed". LOL!
All over it, all over him: tomaytoe, tomahtoe.
Okay, I thought harder.
This goes back a ways, but in the first book in one of Nora's Irish trilogies, the Born In series, there is amazing chemistry between Maggie and Rogan. She's a glass-blower artist from the countryside and he is a sophisticated gallery owner from Dublin. Instant heat but more than lust, there's a real connection between these two. Needless to say, she does NOT like him when she meets him. Great example of chemistry.
I love when they don't like each other when they first meet. That's my favorite type of tension to write and turn into chemistry. I love when you get into an argument and the argument turns into something more.
Sin - You just made my day. That's my WIP! LOL!
I know and that's what I love about your characters. You keep it real. Hellie keeps it real too. You should've heard how pissed off I was when I read this scene between A and E. OMG, was I mad and it wasn't even HAPPENING!
I know. *LOL* I rather felt good about how pissed you were about it, but at the same time I wondered if I should tone it down for being a bit too real. I also feared for Mattycakes. *LOL*
I LOVED that scene. It totally worked for me and I want her to keep it just the way it is.
But then I also don't have a large man antagonizing me all day the way you do. We have totally different perspectives on it. LOL!
I know. Mattycakes came home the next night and asked me if I was pissed off about something and I couldn't figure out what the hell he was talking about. He was talking about the realistic fight in your WIP. My hand to God, it was like you were hiding in our closet and listening to us.
Oh, I loved it as well and actually gave input to make it more natural between them. Because I can assure you that if A was Mattycakes, he'd be a dead man walking, I don't care how cool, calm and collected I normally am.
It be funny...I jes' don't go fer the hate at first sight turnin' ta love at third sight. I understand the I-don'-have-time-fer-this stuff. The it's-inconvenient stuff... But from hate to love? I 'ave a harder time buyin' that.
I tend ta write the initial sight one a' curiosity, with obstacles. Now, Ivy...she and Duran been a friends with benefits sort of thing. Then life gets complicated and serious, he shows his true colors. He's always wanted more...
It's a fun dynamic ta write... How ta get 'er ta open up to the more...grow inta allowin' 'erself ta believe she deserves more, she can 'ave more.
I'm readin' an old Jill Marie Landis right now, set in Hawaii...
Wow! Great description of the moment, Sin.
I read Eloisa James' A Duke of Her Own yesterday, and the chemistry between H/H is incredible. In a very early scene Villiers kisses the heroine's hand--and the scene sizzles. You all should read this book.
MM, severe dislike to severe infatuation. Can you buy that?
I absolutely love Villiers!
Chance - No hate to love. More "off on the wrong foot" irritate each other to love. :)
Janga - I bought it was night and will dive in as soon as I finish GOTH. What a fantastic week for books!!!
Sounds like I need to get my behind to the store and pick up some books.
He's my biggest enemy to I want to screw his brains out? I jus' 'ave a hard time wit' that. Don' mean I can't read it and find meself captivated, but...don't hit me...I find it a bit cliche.
*collectin' thrown rum bottles ta carry off ta the recyclers...
You can turn hate to love--because they're not true opposites. They're simply different feelings of passion--so long as there's still passion, you can work it either direction you like.
Apathy is the true killer of love. If the hero doesn't inspire any feeling whatsoever, there's no hope.
I have more trouble buying stories where they are friends for years and years with no sexual chemistry or feelings--and then boom! she puts on a red dress and suddenly he can't wait to get her into bed. When Harry Met Sally is a hilarious movie--but for me it only works because he always found her attractive, even though they were always friends. You can be attracted to someone, but hate the guy. Believe me, I know this.
Enemies implies I want to kill him. I may fantasize about killing the Mattycakes but he's not my enemy. We did more irritating and pissing off than enemy stuff. I'm not talking the villain takes on the heroine. That's just wrong unless we don't know he's the villain yet and that's tricky (and I like it) but hero and heroine need to annoy each other a little.
Terri, it is a fantastic week. I read EJ's book yesterday and Julie Anne Long's Since the Surrender today (also wonderful!). I'm rereading GOTH now, and the new Duran awaits. The only problem is I'm getting no work done.
Ya could be right, maybe it's jus' me attitude 'bout hate. I do see it as very apathetic. True spitfire hatred be different than the blank wall I tend ta associate hate wit' with. I, personally, tend ta turn me back on those I hate...sorta set them inta a place where I jus' don't encounter them, deal wit' them... I've always had the luxury a' bein' able ta do that...
The passion a' in-yer-face hatred ain't been part a' me life.
Not that I be complainin'!
Janga - I think this week the no work thing is okay. With these books, it's inevitable.
Yes, it's much harder to go from indifferent to love than hate to love. You can't hate someone if you don't give a fig about them. I like to think that's why I don't hate my ex. I don't like him very much, but apathy rules the day in that area.
The friends thing is hard to pull off, but I do think in some cases it works. People see what they expect to see. Sometimes when people have a history of seeing each other one way, they miss some obvious changes. Goodness knows men are known to miss what is right before their noses.
2nd, I get tired of the cliche, he's the laird of the enemy highland clan--I hate him because my family hates him, but I want to do wicked naughty things with him in that 4 poster bed.
Maybe I don't think everyone I don't like (hate) is necessarily my enemy. They're just people I choose to avoid, not seek revenge against. You can have a guy you hate who just annoys the living crap out of you--always showing up at the wrong time, laughing at his own jokes--but you don't have to work with him. It's only if you're forced to work together because you're locked in an elevator...or marooned on an island, whatever, then you might reconsider getting along with the guy or otherwise you'll have to talk to yourself.
If the prospect of talking to this guy is more appealing than talking to yourself, you don't really hate him.
Yeah, if I truly "hate" someone, I go blank and cut you out of my life, it's like you're dead to me and you don't exist. That's the epitome of apathy-hate: the I don't care if you live or die.
The spit fire hate is "I do care if you live or die because if you die, I want the privilege of killing you myself--so I'll be damned if someone else gets to do it first." It's cliche, but you know what, cliches exist because in some form, they're true. *LOL*
As I said, I can read the cliche and get caught up in it...jus' don't find meself believin' it... And I been lucky, never had ta face talkin' ta me enemy due ta a' lack a' others ta talk to!
I do like the phrase spitfire. I have Duran refer ta Ivy as his spitfire woman! LOL!
I'm wit' ya on the "Enemy a' me family but oh! Look at those thighs!" fanny self --- uh uh
I want the enemy a' me family ta be all squint eyed, bow legged, bad teeth...and maybe funny so the heroine be caught off guard.
One a' the reasons I loved Miles Vorkosigan...the unlikeliest of heroes...
*googles Miles* Yeah, he's a bit too unlikely for me. I'm a SHALLOW pirate.
I pretty much go back and forth on the fence: do I want a man who's more handsome than me or who I'm prettier than?
I usually pick him being more handsome than me. *LOL* Since I don't want to date a troll.
A few scars, squinty eyes from staring at the sun...that's all fine...but the bowlegged, bad teeth--that's practically dating some inbred cousin of mine. No thanks.
That "dating a guy prettier or not" is a catch 22 for some of us. LOL! I'd have a hard time finding a guy that isn't prettier than me, but then I'd figure a guy prettier than me wouldn't give me the time of day.
Vicious circle, it is.
Too lazy to google Miles. Who is he? LOL!
For me, I think of hate as something passionate. That's a feeling you have to maintain. Saying you're done with someone and cutting them out just means you don't like them anymore. If you don't care, then you can't have hate. That's how I see it anyway.
"That “dating a guy prettier or not” is a catch 22 for some of us. LOL! I’d have a hard time finding a guy that isn’t prettier than me, but then I’d figure a guy prettier than me wouldn’t give me the time of day."
I have the same exact problem.
Well, no one can ever accuse us of aiming too high.
No comment.
I don't think a heroine in a new dress is likely to turn friends into lovers, I do think a shift in the dynamics can cause people to see one another in a new way. The mistletoe kiss that becomes a little more than casual, seeing the always-there best friend of te opposite sex in a hot clinch with someone else, the way hands look holding a baby or a flower--any of these creating a new awareness that can lead to other things--I find these scenarios totally credible in fiction and in life.
A guy holding a baby. That's a virtual heart-string sucker punch right there.
I knew a guy who married his best friend. They'd known each other for like 17 years, married other people, had kids, then when both divorced, realized they were meant for each other.
It can happen.
The rethought love affair... Me eldest sister be seein' the guy she knew in grade school... It can happen!
Ah, Miles! Miles be the hero of Lois McMaster Bujold's space drama/comedy. Miles be a bit on the dwarfish side, bow legged, spindly bones... Not his fault, his mom was attacked when pregnant by a biological weapon. But...Miles is brilliant, a tactician that turns the tables on everyone. A real romantic...comes from a family with strict military tradition...but he's physically unfit for combat.
Lots of obstacles to overcome, but he is so determined! Really, these books are so worth a look or twelve! And they are fun.
Don't date a guy prettier than you? Come on guys! Terrio - Hel! Raise yer standards! Don't date a guy who is stupid, ignorant, intolerant, righteous, with a wandering eye... Not being prettier should be way down on the list...like number twenty.
I know, says the pirate who married her high school sweetheart and is still married to him...
Man, let's open the bar! Double stuffed flamin' twinkies comin' up! Gots ta get Stephanie on board so I knows if'n I'm doin' this right...
Don’t date a guy who is stupid, ignorant, intolerant, righteous, with a wandering eye…
I didn't date that guy, I married that guy.
I'm going to jump off the side now.
Guys and babies...I do love those photos. They are intoxicating.
There is a sort of delicious conflict with falling in love with your best friend. With the "I hate this guy" conflict, it's the easy sort of conflict of "I can't believe I'm attracted to a guy I think is an idiot"--but the friends one, "I can't believe I'm attracted to someone who's almost like my sister." And you're thinking very unsisterly things about her.
Nooooo! Ya were young! Ya knows better now! And ya did get the munchkin outta it...
Where are those pirate floaty things!?
I know it should be down on the list, 2nd, but "sexy" and "good-looking" are within the top 10. I mean, I'm looking for Orlando Bloom pretty or Gerard Butler sexy...scratch that, I am looking for Gerard Butler sexy, but he doesn't have to look like Gerry...just got to project whatever it is that Gerry does.
If I want someone to talk with, I'll call a friend. Honestly. Men don't listen. Sin, back me up.
http://tinyurl.com/nvb34d
I love how she looks to Sin for back up, knowing I'd argue with her. LOL!
Great blog, Sin. Another that I've copied and pasted to keep in my encouragemnt file.
"In a single second, a look can remind you of everything you want and everything you need. Reminding you of what you're missing and compelling you to go after it."
*sigh* yep, it's official. I want to be Sin when I grow up. Lyrical and to the point.
Di
Duh. And you'll note that the guys who were willing to talk to you, only talked about themselves. *Incessantly.* I think if an IV could have been attached that would provide oxygen to their blood without them having to pause for breath to do it the old fashioned way, they'd never stop talking at all.
Pumpkin floaty things? Love it!
Men listen. Well, some men listen. My man listens. When I turn the television off...
Let's hijack the convo...anyone read todays's Dear Abby? Would ya take the money your porn star sister wants to put in your kid's college fund?
I'd totally take the porn money. She earned it so what's the harm? It's not like it's mob money or drug money or something.
Rus listened. Just sayin'...
Awh, Di. That made me a little teary eyed.
And a little leary. I don't want you to end up like me. I only got lucky saying that stuff. LOL
Ah, such cynicism, Hel. If'n me 60 year old MIL could find a soul mate on line, then anyone can do it. And yes, they been tagether over 10 years now...
Di R! Ya won the Emily contest!
I think the harder thing wit' guys is gettin' them ta listen without insistin' they got the answer. Me DH has a hard time wit' that. Jus' listen, I says!
Once I gots him pinned ta the floor, he listens good.
Sin, ya write brilliant, well thought out blogs. Honestly, ya ever do a word count on yer blogs? Write that much each day on yer WIP and you'll have a completed book in no time! Jus' let it flow.
Ya do deep POV so well... I oughta ship ya me MS and get yer feedback... Last editor said I needed more DPOV. It jus' comes through you so well!
It be more than luck, Sin. It be a gift.
Absolutely not with online dating for me again. *shudders in fright* I'm not a cynic. Just a realist. Men have their uses. Listening is not one of them. That's all. Solving problems--that's one of their skills. Tearing up car engines and occasionally putting them back together. That's a skill. Men have plenty of skills. Caring about how my day went or how my writing is going is not one of them.
*looks at Terri* Sure he did. Listening as he thought of ways to get you out of your clothes.
"*looks at Terri* Sure he did. Listening as he thought of ways to get you out of your clothes."
Ain't that one a those uses ya think me be good fer? ;)
That is DEFINITELY one of their uses. And just think, a year ago, I didn't think they were particularly talented at that.
That Y107 guy aside, of course.
And what am I supposed to be arguing against? Men don't listen. Jeez, that's a given for most of them. And Matty and I are best friends and you see how well that works out, Hellie.
Matty doesn't listen because as soon as you've said anything, he's immediately thinking of what can he say to you about *that* that will wind you up. He's like a kid in a candystore at the prospect of "what can I do to set her off like the 4th of July" and I don't mean in a Jenna Peterson sort of way.
Rus was good at both, thankyouverymuch.
Oh, Y108 guy. LOL! I'd forgotten about him. He moved fast for a young'un, didn't he?! I'll never forget you walking across that bar with that guilty look on your face and your pinky in your mouth.
LMAO!!
Hellie, you are SO bad! I love it!
Ah, the stories I know nothin' about!
Matty must like the overflow a' settin' ya off?! ;)
Man, me DH will run like a rabbit when I blow. Uh, get mad. But he's more likely ta poke at me wit' stupid jokes. Drives me ta notice 'im. Like a class clown...
Glad ta hear ya'd take the money, Terrio. So would I! I jus' loved today's column. Hee, hee.
That is quite possibly one of the best word images of the day!
The only overflow Matty is going to get is a Louisville Slugger upside the head.
Ah, such passion!
See? Passion. You'd never know she doesn't hate him. LOL!
See, that's passionately being aggravated. You can be passionate about aggressiveness. Nothing wrong with that. Before Matty and I hooked up, I avoided him like the plague. Not only did he intimidated me (Yes, he did) but he aggravated the HELL out of me.
I think the boys practice aggrivatin' the women ta get attention. Like puttin' bugs down a' girl's dress... They never grow up!
*poke *poke
Passion I get. As I stated afore, me hate isn't passionate, it be on the apathetic side. But I get how it works fer others, really!
Careful, Q, it's the Louisville Slugger.
Di says: *sigh* yep, it’s official. I want to be Sin when I grow up. Lyrical and to the point
*grin* I am grown up and still want to write like her!
She's got me intrigued by her secret weapon.
I wonder ....... :lol:
"Hellie, you are SO bad! I love it!"--I'm suddenly reminded of that scene from Guardian Angel (Julie Garwood) where the half-blind pirate is reassured he's horrible and fierce--and he says, "It's good of you to say so." *LOL* Because it was clear he was neither horrible or fierce. A kleptomaniac, sure....
Q? Yer grown up? Really? I always figured ya were really some adoloscent boy eatin' hot pockets and pretendin' ta live in England when ya really live in yer Mom's basement in Hobokin... :)
ROFLMAO!!!
He's a bonafide English gentleman. I can vouch for him. ;)
Honestly, sometimes I read back what I write and I muse that it's just luck. I don't know where half this shit I spew on the blog comes from.
Shhhhh, Hellie. You just can't tell him.
Ooooh, Q *crooking a finger* C'mere love and I'll show you my secret weapon.
Sin's Secret Stash of Really Good Blogs?
It's inside ya, Sin. We all know it. Ya needs ta see it and know it, too.
Ya sneaky ninja tart.
*grin* There's always something secret about me.
Which says something about how small my proud moments are! LOL!
I ever tall ya I was voted Most Mysterious by my high school class? Senior year?
Me proudest moment!
LOL. That would be an awesome thing! I would be proud of that too!
I credit my full length purple velvet cape with leaving my classmates so baffled about me, they decided I must be mysterious...
I don't think I've ever been mysterious. I'm too stinking Irish. LOL!
Between MM and me, we can teach you Marn!
I found out Sr year that my classmates thought I had a more adventurous life than I really had. Oddly enough, I found that flattering.
Sin's Secret Weapon. Is that going on the drink menu?
"I don’t think I’ve ever been mysterious. I’m too stinking Irish."
LOL, Marnee!!! My DH always says I'm like an open book. Couldn't lie to save my life.
Great blog, Sin. I love reading great chemistry but am not too sure how to create it yet. The Nora example is good, Ter. She seems to do it and do it effortlessly. SEP (as always) does a good job at this too.
I like both scenarios - friends to lovers and enemies to lovers. Janga's tibdbits about how to see a person differently is spot on. I've been toying with that only in the opposite direction. Having the hero see the heroine as a certain way and then putting her in a situation that shows off her true colors, so to speak.
I've been thinking that what makes chemistry, IMO, is finding someone who has what you need but you're not aware you need it. That's where the opposites attract thingy comes into play too.
I love when either the hero or heroine believe they want/need a certain type of person and the opposite shows up and just blows them outta the water.
Irish - That's similar to a workshop I took at Nationals. It was about every character having a motto and how that can form your characters and your plot. But it is also a way to determine which characters to put together because each character should teach the other something they need to learn.
Maybe one needs to loosen up or one needs to take things more seriously. The concept certainly gives another tool to use in story and character development.
I love the scene in Twelve Sharp where Stephanie and Ranger find Scrog's scrapbook. Ranger shuts down, and Stephanie knows without a word that he needs reassurance. She slips her hand into his, and waits for him to breathe again.
I also love the scene in BED when Hardy rescues Haven from the elevator. She holds onto him for dear life, and you can tell he needs her as much as she needs him. *sigh*
Emotion is so much fun to write. You can express it in so many different actions, even without words.
Great blog!
Marn...wants ta borrow me cape?
Yes, I still 'ave it!
I find capes always help wit' yer reputation.
Hmmm... I wonder how I'd look in a cape. Ridiculous, I'm sure. :)
Irish, great description for chemistry!
God, Lisa, that part was so good. And when he's sitting on the couch and sees his face on the TV as a wanted criminal. And you just feel his sorrow. Or at the end when he walks into her apartment unarmed...
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