Friday, March 14, 2008
Working it
I’m glad I pretend to be a pirate, because honestly, I wouldn’t make a good one. I don’t want to be a legend, or even a household name. I’m not a leader I’m a follower. I’m sure upon hearing this proclamation; Captain Jack will take away my weekend rum portion. Oh well, I’m not much of a drinker either. *g*
I’m new to the writing game. I’ll be the first to admit I have a lot to learn on the rules, and intricacies of the world of writing. The only thing I’m certain of is that I love to write.
I’ve always been a loner.
My two brothers are 6 and 7 years older than I am. I practically grew up an only child. I played alone most of my childhood, and never once complained. You might assume it’s because I was a spoiled child. Well, that’s beside the point, but I actually enjoyed playing alone. I could sit for hours with my Barbie dolls and be completely content. I credit these moments as my earliest work with dialog. I either talked aloud or mentally conversed with Barbie, Ken, and Midge. I brought GI Joe into the mix when I wanted a little adventure action. I enjoyed making up scenes and situations for them to act out, and of course, it involved a great deal of angst. Even at an early age, I aspired to be a queen of angst.
I still am a loner. I would be content to live on an island as long as I have my laptop, a lifetime supply of Diet Coke, and a bookstore nearby. The point I’m trying to make, is that I don’t always enjoy conversing, especially when it involves talking about me. I can write stories all day, but when it comes to getting my point across, I lack ingenuity. I may have a wonderful understanding of the subject at hand, but that doesn’t mean I’ll ever prove it to anyone, and most of the time it’s not my main priority.
I realize that in networking with other writers, I meet many successful people who can prove to be great mentors. I appreciate the blog for that reason, and I admire the writers and readers who stop by every day to comment. I admit I find it hard to get to know people in type written words. It’s very easy to misinterpret words without the accompaniment of facial expression. It’s difficult enough for me to get to know a person when they are standing in front of me. You throw a keyboard and a couple of modems in the equation, and it gets even cloudier.
If being published depends on me tooting my own horn, and name-dropping then I’ll never succeed. It’s not about whom I know, or who knows me, it’s about my individuality, and how I voice it in my writing. If somewhere during the journey I make a few lingering impressions with my peers, then I’ll feel I accomplished something.
Don’t get me wrong, I love you all, but if you need me, I’ll be below deck.
Do you find it intimidating to network? Are there days when you don’t feel like commenting, or blogging, even when it’s your day to produce? Does anyone else have the sudden urge for a drink with the accompaniment of a tiny paper umbrella? Is it Friday yet?
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39 comments:
Yes!
You know me. I can't talk to someone I don't know. It gives me hives. I know eventually I'll have to get over it, but I'll have to take lessons from the DH. He can talk to anyone.
And thank goodness it's Friday. But I suppose that means I need to write. LOL
Lisa, I know what you mean. There are days that I shut down, too. Sometimes I just need "me time." I think that it's the Aquarian in me. However, I mainly enjoy conversing with people on the Internet. I've found that I meet more genuine people with common interests on the Internet and like people on the Internet significantly more than I do in this small town in which I live. I don't hate this town. It's a nice place to raise my kids. It's just that I don't meet the mold around here, and I find it difficult to meet people and make friends. Probably because I consider most of them superficial. If you want to be "someone" in this town, then you have to attend a particular church, patronize a particular bank, work at a particular school or job...you get the picture. I am a rebel by nature. (I think it's the Aquarian thing again. LOL!) I refuse to assimilate. Thus, I find it harder to make "real" friends. I've been blessed with a few good friends, but I will never win a popularity contest, which is okay by me. :-)
It's definitely Friday, and my tea is not strong enough. I was always sociable, happy to talk on the phone, but now, give me e-mail, blogs, anything to distance myself and fix whatever stupid thing I typed. Not that I belabor things, but I can converse in my pajamas at midnight with more ease than I can all dressed up at a party. The only thing that keeps me going is that most writers are loners and shy. I'm not a freak. I'm not.*g*
Thank God for Fridays! I sooooooo need a weekend, like you wouldn't believe.
Talking to people I don't know? hmmm...how to answer that. Well I pipe up when I don't know people... but, if you were to put a few drinks in my belly... I never freaking shut up, it's like everyone in the world is my friend... just ask fran and ter.... it's like I've a split personality. maybe I do?
I don't mind networking via the net. I like talking to other writers, we have that big huge thing in common, breaks a lot of ground when you are getting to know someone.
Awesome blog, Lisa!!! I'm right there with ya! As I've gotten older I've pushed myself to go out to people... talk, be friendly, even though my inclination is to just sit in the corner and watch. I'm never really all that confident that what I have to contribute is all that interesting, besides the fact that I love to people watch.
I also suffer from foot in mouth a lot of times and conversing on the internet allows me the opportunity to read over what I'm saying several times, edit, reword, etc., etc. Even with all that I still feel like I stick my foot in it at times! (Sometime you'll have to ask Terri about my frantic e-mail a couple of months ago! LOL)
It is kind of strange to try to get to know people on the internet without the accompaniment of facial expressions but I think after a couple of years I'm getting the hang of it. It did feel rather awkward at first... Did I spell that word right? Did that statement that I meant to be funny come off as funny or mean? Are they all going to notice that I use too many commas and end my sentences in prepositions a lot! I'm learning that this is a pretty forgiving lot! I guess deep down inside I also really like to discuss all sorts of things and even if I would never offer up my opinion in a room full of women at a PTA meeting I feel pretty comfortable doing so on these blogs. I feel comfortable and accepted. It's a pretty neat feeling.
The utlimate would be for all of us to meet (maybe mid country) for drinks and have a good old fashioned girl's night out. That would be awesome (another word I use a lot since marrying my surfer dude husband!)
I just realized that when Captain was here, she had Sin on the phone and just sort of threw it at me. I started talking and never gave her a second to freak out. So, Sin, did I freak you out? LOL!
Tiff is a perfect example of a shy person finding it easier to talk to other writers. I've seen her totally shut down when approached by a stranger in a book store, totally open up with a few drinks in her, and I'm ecstatic to say she's now a participating member of her local chapter. Thanks to a little prodding from someone very pushy. LOL!
Irish - that email was so funny. Wasn't that the near miss towel and young eyes incident? LOL!
Misty - Seriously can't wait for Nashville. 'Nuff said. *g*
Lisa - Great blog. I am the total opposite. LOL! I can talk to anyone, anywhere, anytime. Well, unless it's a cute guy in a bar. Then I can't even make eye contact. But other than that, I'm as outgoing as they get.
And I believe you'll find yourself in the same situation as Tiff. There's just something wonderful and welcoming and comfortable that happens when you meet other writers. It's different than any other group I've ever been around.
I never really freaked out. Hellion just said, "Here. Talk to Terri." And then you said hi and then I kept you on the phone for an hour. LOL
I know what Hellion was doing she was warming me up. Does that make her my phone fluffer?
Phone fluffer. LOL! Love it.
Yes, yes I believe that does. hehehe
Sin- ditto, we are as alike in this aspect as two peas in a pod:)
Misty Jo- I think we all experience the need for down time. I live in the same kind of little town. I say I enjoy writing around locals and I get a blank look or an eye roll.I can talk to others on the internet with back and forth emails but I totally dislike chat rooms. I get hives everytime I enter one. I have a few really great friends and some of them I met on the internet:)
Maggie- I love conversing in my PJs!
Irish-Thank you! I always freak out when I miss spell, or am in a hurry to post something at work and hit the post key before editing. Then I find mistakes. *blush* I also agree that it's easier to talk about some subjects on the internet rather than face to face.
Tiff- it's nice to know it's possible I'll come out of my shell, but since I haven't in 42 years, I'm doubtful.
Ter- It doesn't matter if I'm in a room of friends that I know as well as the back of my hand, before the evening is over I end up in a quiet corner. I take so much stimulation and then I just shut down. It's just how I am:)
*LOL* Lisa, I don't think *MOST* writers like networking or think they have anything real to say when it comes about themselves. Put a writer on the spot, and they're freak out every time. Doesn't mean they're not a writer; and it doesn't mean they're not a GOOD writer.
I'm pretty sure Laurell K Hamilton is NOT a networker, but you can't doubt her success. In fact, network too much and you're not writing. It's a balance. I think your goal is just "don't run anyone off who does try to talk to you" and with your southern accent and all, I think you'll be perfectly gracious and charm them despite yourself.
If he stayed on topic, he'd be boring. Well maybe not boring but not as entertaining as he is now. LOL
Lisa--totally with you on the "I need to be by MYSELF" even if I'm surrounded by people I enjoy hanging out with. Stimulation. It's a Pisces thing.
Sin & Terri: Phone Fluffer? Can I put that on my resume?
Very true. Matty is NEVER boring.
Great blog Lisa!! I think fearing networking comes along with the writer personality. I think most of us are watchers by nature and because we are so attuned to how we perceive others, we are also very attuned to how we perceive ourselves.
At least I think that's how I am. :)
Maggie - I love conversing in my jammies too!! LOL!!
Misty - I think I grew up in your town! Small town America has an interesting dichotomy. I think the things that make it so appealing also make it so tedious. The fact that everyone knowing each other makes it safer, but then it also makes it so everyone's up your business all the time.
Irish - I am all for a mid-country rendezvous. Although, perhaps somewhere tropical?
Oh and ladies, a phone fluffer? LOL!!
Oh, forgot to say I'm all about a get-together. But I'll second Marnee's suggestion of someplace warm. Like Jamaica. LOL!
Yes, Phone Fluffer would fall right behind Jack Sparrow worshipper and Harry Potter Enthusiast. LOL!
Maggie - PJs are the best things ever. Only truly comfortable pants I own. LOL!
Lisa - you can still watch. As long as you chime in every now and then, you'll be fine. *g*
I step away to stretch someone's bladder and come back to a phone fluffer conversation....no where else but the ship would this happen.
Marnee-I am so up for the tropical get together, paper umbrella and all.
Sin and H- I just received a message on My Space from Toni Blake, it appears she's a Plum fan too...I asked if she was a babe or cupcake. I'm sad to report she's a cupcake. I bet we could convert her if we bring her aboard:)
You're *stretching bladders* and the fluffer conversation is what gets you? LOL!
Toni will be hopping aboard in June so you'll have all day to convert her. I know between the five of us, she'll be a babe in no time!
*donning Batman cape* Toni won't know what hit her:)
Stretching bladders is mild compared to what I usually do.
That surprises me.
Not only do you have MySpace *wide eyed* But Toni Blake is a cupcake.
My world is turned upside down.
I'm guessing babes are Ranger fans and cupcakes are Morelli fans?
Yes. If I was called a cupcake as an affectionate name, I'd smack someone.
Why do we always end up in tangents about Ranger? Not that I mind, mind you, but I guess you can tell where this ship is steered. LOL
I know! "Cupcake" makes my blood boil. *LOL* It's like being called "Sugar pie" or *looks at Terri* "Toots". It's got that patronizing undertone to it. Like you're a fluffy bit of nothing, whose only good for hanging on his arm and making him look better.
"Babe" makes me think of guys with leather jackets who are talking to their women. Less about making them look good; and more like Rizzo and liable to kick your ass if you step out of line. More an equal.
And that's how I think of Morelli and Ranger. Morelli treats her like a sugar ornament; and Ranger treats her like an equal.
Let me get this straight. You think *babe* is a good thing? LOL! Really? I mean, I can see it when Ranger says it, but not from just anyone. And he hasn't called me *toots* lately. He's learning.
This reminds me of a convo I had yesterday. I called a co-worker dude and he stopped mid-sentence to tell me not to call him dude. I called him dude three more times in the convo, completely by accident. He finally figured out I wasn't being a smart ass and couldn't control my dudes. LOL! (Yes, that sounds wrong)
We finally agreed I can call him dude. *g*
Some dude once told me that calling someone "dude" was just like calling him a "dingleberry." I had to ask him what a dingleberry was. When he told me, I kept calling him "dude" because he was a dingleberry. He was just another idiot in my sister's collection.
I have a bad habit of calling people "babe."
I call the professors around here "dude" occasionally. Esp when they want to do something to cause trouble. "Dude, we can't be doing that. Are you mental? Wait, what am I saying, clearly you are..."
Okay, well, think of it as Morelli and Ranger then. When Ranger says Babe, he says it as a equal gesture. But Morelli says cupcake all the time--and though it's a term of affection--it's clear he thinks she's a fluffy idiot.
If a man called me Babe like Ranger calls Steph babe, all would be well. Better than "Fanny" or "Frannie" or "Sexy" (I always think when men call me Sexy they're being sarcastic. Actually I know they must be.)
The only reason I have a My Space page is because Amanda prodded me into it..believe me, between blogging, face book, The Batcave, and now My Space I ask myself what I used to do in my spare time.
Ranger can call me Babe anytime. I started the Ranger tangent:) But hell it's Friday.
Ranger can call me anything. Seriously. Except for cupcake. I do have moral standards.
And I say "dude" and "babe" a lot. I'm like a stonner without drugs.
*snort* I can't even go there Sin.I'm liking this day too much to get my panties in a bunch.
I obviously haven't read enough of these books to notice this. I actually don't mind babe but cupcake would drive me crazy.
At the risk of being tossed overboard, I liked Morelli better than Ranger in the first book. Maybe I need to get further before I make my final judgment.
Don't worry, Marn. I've also only read the first one and I liked Morelli. When he wasn't being a PITA. LOL! But I've read enough of Sin's fanfic to be a babe no matter what. *g* Seriously, I've had to use and extinguisher on my monitor more than once.
Whew!
Marnee I guarantee if you continue, by book six you'll come to the dark side.
Ranger. Is. The. Shit.
Ditto what Lisa said. I assure you, after 6--you're a Ranger Babe for Life.
I liked Morelli in the first book. I mean, I love an asshole just as much as the next girl, but I'd never date him. Okay, I'd date him, but I'd never stay with him. Our house would implode from my nuclear breakdowns every time he tried to be macho. Which is what Steph used to do. But she was de-attituded in the last numbered book. Made me very sad.
I fell in love with Ranger in the first book I read. But we know it was Hard Eight. LOL. I could see why people wouldn't fall in love with him right away but by book five when he kisses her.. c'mon.
See, who wants to wait FIVE books before he kisses her? LOL! I know too much. I could never be that patient!
Ditto Ter! I don't think I could wait that long either! I think that's why JE frustrates me. I need more instant gratification than that.
LOL. It's because Ranger was never going to be a love interest and he just ended up that way.
Sorry I'm late.
You know this is a great blog Lisa. I really hadn't ever considered posting on blogs networking. It's just good clean, er...not always clean, fun. I like talking to people I don't know in stores and stuff and I don't have any clue why. It's just nice to connect with others especially in a book store about a book I really liked. And all of the people I've met on-line have been grat, yourself included:)
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