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Monday, January 7, 2008
A New Start
As you've undoubtedly read on every blog between here and the moon, it's the beginning of January (in case you were calendar-less) and it's time to start anew. Polish off old resolutions or implement new anti-resolutions--whatever. Resolve to do something. Start it. Take action.
Incidentally, I decided to get cracking more seriously about my new WIP, the "paranormal lite" contemporary where Adam & Eve, upon failing marriage counseling, find new spouses. With the Boatswain, I hammered out a relatively credible "plot" (I have to put it in quotations because it scares me so much. Much like "bogeyman") and she asked questions and by God, I was actually able to answer the questions. I had conflict. I had motivation. I had characters and goals. I had secondary characters who were funny. This has the makings of a funny book. I was excited on Friday with my strides I had made. After all, I had "finished" GOGU back in June--and it's been so long since I've written anything really good. Now I had a list. I had an outline, some structure, some direction. I had a plan, Stan.
Then Saturday, the Quartermaster and I met, had a very productive writing meeting with only about half the tangents of usual and only one bowl of cheese, and I skipped home with a new book about Las Vegas and a new lease on life...er, my WIP.
Then I had to open Word and actually start writing. Now the problem is I'd already written about 4 or 5 chapters. I had liked them at the time, but now I can see this is not the beginning I need. I need something else. So technically what I should probably do is scrap it and just start again. 20,000 words--plip, gone.
Strangely, I've forgotten how much I hate writing beginnings. It's been so long since I've written one. I love new ideas and playing with new ideas, but actually sitting down and committing them to paper and trying to make them sound as brilliant as they do in my head: I hate it.
So I got to thinking about it. I also hate writing the middle of the book. Getting from point A to point Z is a problem and I have to think of some very clever points of B-Y in order to keep my readers reading. It's exhausting. I'm just not that engaging. Besides, this is why I wrote my plot--so I wouldn't have to spend so much time figuring out these points. They'd write themselves. I just don't know when they're going to write themselves.
And then, I realized I also hate writing the ending. Winding up all my strings, tying them into a neat bow, leaving my readers satisfied--I mean I've only managed to write THE END for two WIPs and one had to be scrapped entirely; and the other, well, I'm still editing that mess. Apparently I'm shit with endings too. But I remembered how I hate writing the ending to stuff, because it's not been all that long since I wrote the ending to the WIP, but being I had written the beginning two years ago, I'd forgotten how painful it was.
Now I'm back at the beginning and I'm realizing just because I've finished two WIPs, it doesn't mean it's any easier to write the beginning or the middle or the end. I mean, does it truly get any easier to give birth to a squalling infant just because you've done it a couple times now? I would imagine not. It might not *take* as long to accomplish the same ends, but you can't tell me it didn't hurt any less.
So if you find you're in the beginning stages of labor and that it's painful, I have to tell you it doesn't get any easier. You might get a knack for it, sort of like the woman who has 12 kids, but it's still going to be painful and you're still going to have to clean it up and polish it when it arrives. You might even get accomplished *grins* at creating the little buggers, but it's still going to take nine months and it's still going to be some painful labor involved in the end. But on the upside, like childbirth, there's nothing to do (once you're committed) but to press on and deliver. It'll be worthwhile in the end...in 18 years or so.
Okay, so all you people who've given birth, am I right or wrong? Does it get easier--or do you not dread it so much simply because you know what's coming and you've dealt with it before? Do you like writing--or do you like having written? Do you like writing beginnings or middles or ends?
Incidentally, I decided to get cracking more seriously about my new WIP, the "paranormal lite" contemporary where Adam & Eve, upon failing marriage counseling, find new spouses. With the Boatswain, I hammered out a relatively credible "plot" (I have to put it in quotations because it scares me so much. Much like "bogeyman") and she asked questions and by God, I was actually able to answer the questions. I had conflict. I had motivation. I had characters and goals. I had secondary characters who were funny. This has the makings of a funny book. I was excited on Friday with my strides I had made. After all, I had "finished" GOGU back in June--and it's been so long since I've written anything really good. Now I had a list. I had an outline, some structure, some direction. I had a plan, Stan.
Then Saturday, the Quartermaster and I met, had a very productive writing meeting with only about half the tangents of usual and only one bowl of cheese, and I skipped home with a new book about Las Vegas and a new lease on life...er, my WIP.
Then I had to open Word and actually start writing. Now the problem is I'd already written about 4 or 5 chapters. I had liked them at the time, but now I can see this is not the beginning I need. I need something else. So technically what I should probably do is scrap it and just start again. 20,000 words--plip, gone.
Strangely, I've forgotten how much I hate writing beginnings. It's been so long since I've written one. I love new ideas and playing with new ideas, but actually sitting down and committing them to paper and trying to make them sound as brilliant as they do in my head: I hate it.
So I got to thinking about it. I also hate writing the middle of the book. Getting from point A to point Z is a problem and I have to think of some very clever points of B-Y in order to keep my readers reading. It's exhausting. I'm just not that engaging. Besides, this is why I wrote my plot--so I wouldn't have to spend so much time figuring out these points. They'd write themselves. I just don't know when they're going to write themselves.
And then, I realized I also hate writing the ending. Winding up all my strings, tying them into a neat bow, leaving my readers satisfied--I mean I've only managed to write THE END for two WIPs and one had to be scrapped entirely; and the other, well, I'm still editing that mess. Apparently I'm shit with endings too. But I remembered how I hate writing the ending to stuff, because it's not been all that long since I wrote the ending to the WIP, but being I had written the beginning two years ago, I'd forgotten how painful it was.
Now I'm back at the beginning and I'm realizing just because I've finished two WIPs, it doesn't mean it's any easier to write the beginning or the middle or the end. I mean, does it truly get any easier to give birth to a squalling infant just because you've done it a couple times now? I would imagine not. It might not *take* as long to accomplish the same ends, but you can't tell me it didn't hurt any less.
So if you find you're in the beginning stages of labor and that it's painful, I have to tell you it doesn't get any easier. You might get a knack for it, sort of like the woman who has 12 kids, but it's still going to be painful and you're still going to have to clean it up and polish it when it arrives. You might even get accomplished *grins* at creating the little buggers, but it's still going to take nine months and it's still going to be some painful labor involved in the end. But on the upside, like childbirth, there's nothing to do (once you're committed) but to press on and deliver. It'll be worthwhile in the end...in 18 years or so.
Okay, so all you people who've given birth, am I right or wrong? Does it get easier--or do you not dread it so much simply because you know what's coming and you've dealt with it before? Do you like writing--or do you like having written? Do you like writing beginnings or middles or ends?
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56 comments:
funny! Uh, it got easier for me with the second kid. I knew what to expect, when to bear down, kinda like the second go 'round for a full length WIP (Untamed Desire) Is coming to me easier... and I always seem to get stuck just over the middle...usually because I haven't a clue on how I want to end it.
I've only given birth once but it was a breeze. I'm sure I should feel guilty about that but I don't. *g* Drugs are a wonderful thing and lucky for me, 30 minutes of pushing and she made her arrival. Other than the stitches that took a few days to heal, it was pretty simple.
Sorry you asked? LOL!
I have yet to get to the end of a WIP but I am *almost* finished with my current short story and I'm getting very excited. I'm a Plantster so I always know how I want the story to end. I just don't always know exactly how I'm going to get there.
I like writing beginnings but I did what you are talking about and ended up scrapping the original first 20 or 30 pages of mine. I was hoping that was because it was my first but you're not making me very good about that now. :(
If it's flowing, no matter if it's the beginning, middle or end, I'm enjoying it. If it's not flowing, well, I don't want to talk about that.
I always figured Terr came from peasant stock. She has the look of someone who'd give birth in a rice field and never notice. She'd probably get the infant to start harvesting with her, she's so damned efficient.
Thank you, Tiff. Your comment doesn't make me feel quite so bad. *LOL* Even though we know you write all the time...but strange, I have to know my ending first so I know vaguely where I'm going. Like if I get in the car, I need to know if I'm going to Boston or LA--because I certainly don't want to get on I-70 E if my intended destination is the sunny shores of California. No one likes to be in the car that long.
Did you seriously just call me a peasant? Didn't we have this conversation recently?
I admit, I do have those *child bearing hips* we hear so much about. And that extra fat in the belly area came in handy as I manage to come through the experience without stretchmarks. Whew!
My ex's aunt did tell me once she'd never seen anyone have a baby so easily. Even the pregnany (other than month 3) was wonderful. I've never been as healthy as I was in those nine months.
So, if your analogy is accurate, I should be able to *birth* a book without breaking a sweat. Well, my first WIP has gestationed much longer than nine months and I'm still in the first trimester stage. LOL! It figures I would make the easier stuff harder.
I have a gazillion stretch marks--and no children. Don't speak to me about stretch marks.
I didn't say I don't have them. I just don't have them on my stomach. I have to take the small triumphs where I can find them...
I've only had one child. It wasn't easy. I pushed for three hours and then had to have a C-section. I lost 2 units of blood afterwards and it wasn't a fun time, but it was ceratinaly worth it. I think working on a WIP is the same way. It will take a long time for me to get to the final enjoyment but it will be worth it.
I hate writing middles. It seems to drag and it's hard for me to make it interesting, but after much persistance I usually find a twist or black moment to bridge the story to the climax and the HEA.
I just started my first WIP. I have found the same thing Hellion- beginnings suck. I have written it three different ways and I'm not happy with any of them. Hopefully I'll write another scene I have in mind and come back to the beginning with a more refreshing look than before.
No, I think the rice field would be me... :D She used drugs if you'll recall. Me, I'm a natural kinda gal, a bit of a masochist :D
And love the plantser comment!
K, after reading Lisa's comment, I feel a little guilty. How scary.
Yes, drugs are my friend when it comes to child birth. I planned for the epidural but not the demerrol (sp?). My body's natural reaction to severe pain is to *empty my stomach* for lack of a prettier description and the nurses were not interested in changing my sheets every two minutes.
So I floated my way through. Tiff is more the "I am woman, hear me roar and shove out small humans with nary a blink" kind of woman.
*ROTF* I am woman hear me roars as I shove small humans with nary a blink... *LOL* That's Tiff. She was a Hun in a previous life, I'm positive.
Lisa, see, YOURS is the kind of childbirth story they share around here, and I'm kinda glad I don't have one. No telling what I or my child would do to freak out the doctor and nurses. I, myself, was a *miracle baby*; I had three transfusions, nearly killed my mother, and wasn't supposed to live. And I was supposed to be riddled with birth defects. Other than an extremely dirty mind, I think I bypassed most of them.
Unless you count cynicism as a birth defect...
I can't write a first chapter. Nope. Can't do it. I'm an action kinda girl. I think to start in the middle of something and keep running. And the more I write, the harder it gets. I'm completely backwards.
PS. I'm sad there was no second bowl of cheese dip. We should learn how to keep our mouths shut and eat more.LOL
We had a very productive meeting.
Hellion I knew you were special! And to be blessed with so much wit, after such a tough beginning.
Honestly my childbirth sounds much worse than it really was. I felt on top of the world the next day. I can remember being so happy. I know that sounds totally sappy. I had wanted a baby for so long.It was the best time of my life.
I count cynicism as a "survival-life preservation" technique, so no. Nice try though.
Lisa: Awww...I just had to say that. I think you're probably a great mom--and I'm really glad your dream came true in that realm. Moms are so...sweet...and sappy...I love it.
Sin: we did have a productive meeting! You kept on task though...and I was very disappointed by the lack of the second bowl of cheese, but I already felt like a pig for scarfing down the first bowl. You had like two chips! I didn't dare ask for anymore!
That's because I couldn't shut up long enough to eat. LOL. And you should've just asked! You know I'd get you anything you wanted.
Whew guys, sorry so late.
So, I've only given birth once and it wasn't so easy. Lisa, you and I are birth-giving sister, cause that's how my delivery went too. Pushed for 3 hours and then finally a C-section. (Little pirate had/has an enormous head and was trying to come out sideways. His father's sense of direction undoubtedly.) However, like you, and I think like most moms out there, I say it wasn't so bad. Not that I'd wanna do it every day, but it was completely worth it.
I think labor/delivery comes with selective memory. As time passes, you only remember some things. I remember that epidurals are awesome. I remember my DH saying "Oh, look, he has my ears, he must be mine" as soon as the baby came out. Good thing I was strapped to an operating table. And, I remember afterwards, while they were stitching me up, they were talking about Jay-Z's new album. Yep, thems be good memories.
I have a hard time with middles. I think I'm ok with beginnings, but then I lose steam. I have no idea how I am at endings yet, but will keep you posted.
Tiff, you are an earth goddess. I couldn't have done it natural.
Ter - I hope my next one goes like that. And I'm ridiculously jealous of no stretch marks. My entire middle section is coated in them. I affectionately call them the flames of hell.
You know, ladies, I had a girl and you guys had boys. Maybe that's the trick. Next time, go for a girl. LOL!
Marnee - Flames of Hell? LOL! That's a great title for a book!
Oh, but I had midwives coaching me through the pain, and my mother helping cause husbands are useless during labour... though scott did really good with the boiling of the water and all the running around for the midwives with the second one...who took me two hours to have.. . that's labour, pushing, voila screaming baby :D
I remember every detail, even the 'embarassing' stuff that happens during labour.
LOL Ter! I hadn't thought of that. Sounds more paranormal than I generally write, but hey! One never does know....
I have to agree that my husband just got on my nerves during labor. It's hard to hear that you're doing a good job/hang in there from the person who 1) did that to you 2) will never have to accomplish the massive feat you're attempting to accomplish.
Ah, the embarassing stuff.... Now the memories are coming back.
Did I mention that DH and I are going to start trying to get prego again in a few months? *sigh*
OMG, Marnee, your husband actually said: "he has my ears, he must be mine"--I would have shanked him. Honestly.
A co-worker told about her childbirth (another boy, another big head--she nearly gave birth to an adult!)--and her husband was taping the entire thing...and making comments. So he kept looking at the business end of things--and at one point he returns and says, "You have an angry asshole. It looks like this" and made some motion to demonstrate it. Seriously. I wonder why anyone bothers to have them in the room.
*shudders at the embarrassing stuff* I think my favorite birthing scene in a romance novel is in The Secret (Julie Garwood) and the pregnant woman's water breaks and soils the bed, but she's too embarrassed to tell the heroine--and she says, "That's childbirth. It's messy..." Well, Garwood does it better obviously...but I just thought that was funny. "It's messy."
Yeah, my hubby actually said that. I think he was **trying** to be funny. As you can tell, it must have lost something in the translation between his brain, his mouth, and my ears.
It's messy.... LOL!! That's like the understatement of the universe. And if I recall, the post labor/delivery wasn't the cleanest experience either. Icky.
Marnee my wonderful DH's comment was after my C-section. He says "Look at the bright side, they say most women are never the same downtown after a vaginal birth so that's a plus right? *shitty grin* Men....And I have stretch marks galore anyway, just lucky I guess. Have to admit the epidural was fantabulous. My DH was a pain in the butt during labor too. I vomited the entire time I was in labor, The first time I threw up he panicked because it was red. He thought I was bleeding to death. I said Honey I had lasagne for dinner last night it's tomato sauce get a grip.
The same downtown! ROTFLMAO!! That's hilarious! Our husbands must have been brothers in some other life. Or maybe most men just share the same level of sensibility. Sheesh.
My midwife had to break my water at 9 cm with the son and it didn't break until just before I started pushing with my daughter... so it was... controlled messy!
And you want the hubby in the room so you can tell them how much you hate them as the contractions hit :D
And marnee...ahhh... it's sooooo much fun trying for a baby. But I'm good breeding stock, son was unplanned and it took one practice 'shot' to get preggo with the daughter.
And my kids were big when born, 8lbs 10oz and 9lbs 2 oz. I gained a ton of weight during the preggo's too.. 60lbs :D Not one stretchmark...oh actually there is one...
I don't remember anything embarrassing. Must have been the drugs. I do remember the doctor having the nerve to ask me if I was sure I hadn't done this before. I think I'd remember that, Einstein.
My ex was good for pretty much nothing. Except the nitwit turned the thermostat above his head down to like 52 and they had to cover me in heated blankets to get me to stop shivering convulsively. Dumb ass.
I love that ears comment. But I'm happy for him you were strapped down too. And the angry asshole? That's freaking hysterical. Though can you tell me what a friendly asshole would look like? LMAO!!!
Tiff - I like the whole keeping them there for verbal abuse. It did make me feel better, I must say.
DS was 8 lbs 12 oz, and I think most of that was in his head. He looked like one of those bobble head dolls.... But cute nonetheless.
The trying is the best, I must say. Though DH and I tried for 10 mo with DS, that's with fertility meds. I am hoping it's easier this time.
Ter - on top for a girl, you say? I will keep in mind. I would like a girl this time. Then I think I might be done.
You know, I was thinking.... Do you guys think that position has anything to do with it? Ter, I think you're the second or third person who's mentioned on top for a gal.... Just wondering.... Perhaps I need to do a google search.
Lisa - the first contraction I felt (which was 10 hours into the labor) made me throw up and I asked my ex to get me that little kidney shaped bowl. The moron handed me a dixie cup. Seriously.
I have no idea how I didn't kill him. But I'm having fun in here thinking up new insulting names for him. Not that I haven't thought of all of these before.
I want another one so much but I'm aware there is no guarantee it will be as easy again. And Wee One slept through the night by 7 weeks which is another sign the second might be worse.
*ducks flying shoe from Marnee*
I've heard standing up works too so maybe it's something about the guys having to swim against gravity. It's an idea...
LOL, Ter. The same thing that gives you pause about having another one convinces me I can't possibly get such a high maintenance kid again. :) Unless the gods are trying to punish me.
*Marnee, stifling a yawn from being awakened 4 times with her ONE YEAR OLD, who is STILL a HORRIBLE TEETHER!!!* LOL!!
If there's any true to position it makes sense why I have a boy:)
yeah, me too, Lisa. :)
http://www.babycenter.in/pregnancy/
naming/choosingsexfolklore/
I've heard the trouser/underwear one, but didn't realize it had to do with spermcount and the fact that women sperm are stronger and better swimmers. *LOL* Figures. Even in the womb, we're stronger than men.
Ladies, I have four children. I'm beginning to think labor was much easier than teenhood. I had my first at 18 and begged for drugs, I didn't know any better. The next two were totally natural and they were the quickest and easiest, the third being 45 minutes from the first contraction to the time of birth, yeah we barely made it to the midwife. When the fourth one came around and I asked dh if I could birth at home he about fainted. Come to find out I'm quite abusive, he held the fact that I bit him instead of the bedpan when I was 18 over my head.
Now, they are either teens or tweenies and I'm wondering where in the hell those drugs are.:) Gotta love them though.
AS far as beginnings, sheesh I wrote 85k with an ending and I thought I was done. Once I got into revisions I rewrote the beginning 5 times. I refuse to rewrite it again, but since I rewrote the beginning I had to rewrite the middle, and that is where I currently am, stuck in the middle.
Great blog.
Renee! Welcome aboard! :)
Sheesh, four of them? That does sound rough. It is good they're cute. It keeps them out of mortal peril.
Though, if my little teether keeps waking me up into his teens, I might have to have an intervention....
Stuck in the middle. I can totally relate. What do you think is the hardest part of writing the middle? I find that I have an issue writing the smaller conflicts that propel the larger emotional transformation. Anyone else?
I have trouble with pacing. When I write the middle, I tend to write every moment of it like we're watching an episode of 24. Only it's not 24, where each moment is breathless and action-packed. No. I write chick littish...so it's just pages of sarcastic, funny angst...and it gets old after page 3. Ask Terr.
Renee, hello! Four is a nice...er...round number. My youngest niece is 13 (just turned) and she's been irking me for a good two years now. Fortunately she's frightened to death of me so she isn't too outrageous. She's just...a teenager. I just watch her and go: I was never that annoying as at her age; it wouldn't have been acceptable.
This of course is a lie. What's the line? I was an insufferable child; all children are.
In my bid to find the guy who said the insufferable line, I found these instead...and I have to share them. Don sounds funny!
If a child shows himself to be incorrigible, he should be decently and quietly beheaded at the age of twelve, lest he grow to maturity marry, and perpetuate his kind.
Don Marquis (1878 - 1937)
Happiness is the interval between periods of unhappiness.
Don Marquis (1878 - 1937)
A pessimist is a person who has to listen to too many optimists.
Again - I was BUSY!
For some reason, I don't dread the middle. It's very odd. This in no way means I won't hate it when I get there but I'm looking forward to it. Every scene gets me closer to the big black moment and eventually onto the resolution and the HEA.
Maybe thinking of it as one large piece instead of three parts, it might be easier. A rationalization, which I'm an expert at, but it could help none the less.
My mom had four, two with epidural, two without. I was nine days late then in such a hurry, I shot out while my mother was on a gurney in the hall and the nurse caught me before I hit the floor. I've been trying to recover ever since.
Lord, the middle? You don't like to write the middle!? The meat and potatoes of the story?! I love the middle. I can't write the beginning. I rewrite and rewrite and still can write a beginning. Though, I'm starting to get better at it. LOL.
Renee! How grand of you to stop by the ship! Welcome aboard!
I find all writing painful, unless I've found a second-wind, a sort of groove...it's sorta like jogging. I hate exercise and running, and I suck at it...but I like having jogged. I like not being quite so winded going up stairs and being stronger in instances I wasn't expecting.
I don't like middles because I'm boring...and don't know how to stop writing every freaking detail.
Hellion - if there is one thing you aren't it's boring. :)
Amen Marnee! Our Cap'n and boring will never be found in the same sentence.
Welcome Renee!
If she wasn't so brilliant, I'd ask why she bothers to write at all since she hates it so much. LOL!
When did details become a bad thing? I thought the details are what really sucked the reader in. You have bad self-writing-perception, me thinks.
Okay, everyone loves writing but me. Fine. I'm weird. And I have PMS--so be advised.
Also be advised, the moment any of you say something to the effect you hate writing, I'm going to LAUGH.
Wow, really late today. Very fun blog!
I'm pretty much like Hellion. I hate writing anything but what pops into my head and that hasn't formed into anything concrete yet (beginning, middle or end). I just keep writing sarcastic conversations!
As for childbirth, I've done it twice and the memories do fade, but they are still there... but if I wanted more kids I'd do it again. Unfortunately, like Marnee, the nightmares I have now are of the infant years of no sleep, teething, tantrums, and (in the case of my DD) non-stop questions/talking. Which is starting to slow down now, but which also has me worried because she's heading for her teens and the silence is very scary! I'm so used to knowing every thought in her head, now that she's clammed up I'm very suspicious. So, like Renee, I'm dreading the tween/teens! Basically, giving birth, so far, has been the easiest part of this whole deal!
As for boy vs. girl. We did try and got our boy. The key is that girl sperm last longer and boy sperm is faster. So, get yourself an ovulation kit, Marnee, and start now tracking when you ovulate. When you got it down, have sex the night before you ovulate for a girl and have sex the day of for a boy. That was our trick, anyway.
As for the DH, during delivery he was okay until the midwife starting stitching me up. Then he asked if she could add a few extra which I didn't find at all amusing! He also thought it was quite amusing to tell me that he felt my pain several times at the beginning. He cut down quite a bit on the "funny" comments as I slowly advanced into a total of 18 hours of labor and 2 1/2 additional hours of pushing. He started right back up again once he was assured me and the baby would definitely live! LOL
Capn - you're so funny when you're cranky. LOL!
Irish - I think you might have gotten it right that the birth is the easiest part. Mine talks incessently but she also has a terrible temper and more attitude than I care to think about. The fact she's developing at EIGHT gives me nightmares.
Since I'm not even dating, it's highly unlikely I will get to have another one before, oh say, 2010 at the earliest. Which means I would have an infant and a tween. Heaven help me...
*snortal* A teen and a baby would serve you right.
Ah, but by then I will have talked you into moving here and you can help. *g* And my parents had one in college, a Jr in HS, a middle schooler and a new baby. It wouldn't be unheard of in my family. LOL!
Nor in mine. I was the baby, remember? Brother was 25 when I was born; and my sister was 15.
Ha! I might live close, but I doubt I'll live that close. Besides I frighten children.
*cough* bullshit *cough*
Thank you all for the welcomes. I sailed my way via a map Marnee left behind. Lo and behold I found several familiar names of which I'm a big fan of their brilliant wit.
As to the middles, I try to avoid them at all cost. Not possible when writing and why didn't anyone tell me. Middles are demanding, pouty, and way too temperamental for my likes. They are never pleased with their placing even if you grant them their every desire. Isn't that where all the great sex and grand adventures happen?
I almost always know the beginning and the end before I know the middle. I think that trying to get all those tiny little conflicts tie in with the bigger picture is difficult.
Renee, you're right! It is where all the good stuff happens, but I have the hardest time with them. :( Middles are so bratty.
And I'm glad you followed my breadcrumbs. It's a great place to be. ;)
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