*screen zeroes in on a great big bed with velvet curtains, clearly the interview is being taped from Hellion’s cabin; Captain Jack Sparrow is in the middle, with Hellion, ravishing and redheaded as always, on his left, and a set of gorgeous, voluptuous twins on his right. The twin on his immediate right, Dee S. Knight, is plastered against him, grinning most devilishly, but the other twin, Anne Krist, clearly seems to have been harassed into this fiasco and has her arms crossed and is hiding her face behind one hand*

Hellion: *adjusting her marabou boa and plucking a feather from her tousled hair* Okay, pirates and ‘lubbers, today is a bit of a different interview. Instead of one-on-one….

  

Captain Jack: *arms draped around Hellion and Dee, looking roguish* Oh, I like that.

  

Hellion: It’s actually a foursome. *CJ looks even more delighted*

  

Dee: *clapping delightedly and nearly coming out of her corset top* I’ve always wanted to be in a foursome!

  

Anne: *groaning behind her hand* I am in hell.

  

Hellion: So without any further ado, let me introduce you to our guests today, Dee S. Knight *Dee bounces again, once again nearly coming out of her clothes* and her sister, Anne Krist. *Anne seems to shrink a little as if she’s trying to fade into the downy comforter* Welcome, ladies, and I want to thank you for coming on the ship and interviewing with us.

 

Dee: It’s not my first time.

 

Anne: That’s not the first time you’ve said that.

  

CJ: Again, I like that. *oogling Dee’s cleavage*

  

Hellion: *subtly elbowing Jack* What Dee means is that she blogged with me last year when her book, Heat Wave, hit the stores. Heat Wave is now in print format and available to hold in your hot little hands as you sit on the beach this summer. Which incidentally is the best place to experience a Heat Wave.

  

Dee: *snuggling closer to CJ and grinning* Junior there has reminded me of a story. Two women worked in the same company. One was a little mousy, but had a good reputation. She worked in accounting. The other…well, she worked in finance and her, let’s say, her halo was a bit tarnished.

  

Anne: Like yours?

  

Dee: For whatever reasons, the boss decided to switch their places. One day, two men were strolling into the office. “Say,” one said, “I heard Sarah is moving up in finance.” “Yeah, the other said, “Tammy is going down in accounting.” The first said, “That’s not the first time that’s happened.”

  

CJ: *roaring in laughter*

 

Anne: I don't get it.

 

Dee: She...never mind. *Dee shakes head* How the same parents raised both of us I’ll never know.

 

Hellion: That’s okay, Dee. My parents are confused how they acquired a pirate baby. It happens. *glances back at her questions as if just now realizing she’s supposed to be on task* Dee is here today in support of her sister Anne, whose new book came out July 2. The book is Burning Bridges. Ladies, would you mind telling a little more about your respective books and writing styles?

 

Dee: I’ll go first.

 

Anne: *sweetly* Age before beauty.

 

Dee: *smiling just as sweetly in return* If that’s what you choose to believe, Dear. Though must I remind you again that I am only 20 minutes older than you and we are identical twins? *winking at CJ* Heat Wave is just that: a wave of scorching hot writing by four talented authors.

 

Anne: She says, including herself.

 

Dee: *blushing* Well, I didn’t mean it like that, exactly. But all of the stories did receive really excellent reviews when they were released last summer on their own. Mine, Second Wind, is the tale of how Mother Nature forces a couple to realize what they mean to each other. I share the volume with wonderful people: Bonnie Dee, Veronica Wilde and Jamie Craig. I think all of the stories are outstanding, and as you so kindly pointed out, Hellion, Heat Wave is for sale now in print.

 

Anne: Is it my turn now?

 

Dee: *graciously bows her head and then turns her attentions to CJ’s roving hands*

 

Anne: *rolling eyes* Get a room.

 

Well, I’m thrilled to death to tell you about my book Burning Bridges. Dee had already started Passionate Destiny when I was visiting mom in Virginia. On the radio one day we heard about bags of mail found in a guy’s shed up in the mountains. He’d been a mail carrier and just decided one day he didn’t feel like working. He stuck the bags in his shed and then just forgot about them. That had been 20 years ago or something. I wondered what kind of havoc his actions caused. Did people have their electricity turned off because their bills didn’t arrive? Did someone miss the announcement of a birth or death? What about if someone had declared their love and never heard back—would that cause a broken heart that lasted for years?

 

I went home and wrote Burning Bridges in a month. I thought it was pretty good, but none of the agents and editors I sent the manuscript to were as thrilled as I. I received very nice and helpful rejections. After one agent I really admire said the premise wasn’t enough to carry a book, I mentally put it on the shelf. Then BookStrand sent out a call for manuscripts and I thought, what the heck? They contracted for it. My editor and their test reader loved it, and the first reviews have been very good. I’ve loved this book from the beginning and I’m so happy some others do, too. *wiping a tear from her eye*

 

Dee: Anne, you were supposed to tell the good folks what the book is about, not relay the history of the world.

 

Anne: Oh, yes. Sara Richards receives letters from 30 years ago which changes everything in the way she sees her life. As she sets out to unravel the tangle of lies she created, she can only hope not to burn too many bridges.

 Hellion: *laughing* You guys are a hoot. You definitely scrap like sisters. For all your differences, and they do sound vast, at the core, you two share the same values in your writing: passionate and emotional character-driven stories. Would you say this is true? What do you think you two have in common? What do you each like most about the other’s writing? Would you recommend each other?

 

 Dee: Of course, we share parents. And, uh, clothes sometimes.

 

 Anne: *eyes wide* Is that what happened to my blue cashmere Ann Taylor sweater with the silver rose buttons?

 

 Dee: Focus, Dear. Seriously, Hellion, Anne portrays emotion pretty well. I mean, I cry every time I read Burning Bridges, and God knows, she made me read me over and over while she was revising. Like her, I like characterization. I always focus on characters and their feelings more than plot.

  

Anne *muttering*: Do your sexy stories have plot?

 

 Dee: Haha. Hellion, you asked if I would recommend Anne’s books, and the answer is I would! I love the way she creates emotion. Her books seem real. I want to read a book that makes me feel what the characters do, and Anne manages to do that.

 

 Anne: Well, I did pick up a few tips from you, Sis. I’ll admit it. I’d recommend Dee’s books because the sex is hot without going over the top, and it’s always part of the story. That the characters would engage in sexy behavior as they do and when they do is natural in her work. That isn’t always the case in erotic romance.

  

Hellion: I know what you mean. What projects are you both working on now? When can we expect to see a new Dee or Anne novel on the shelves?

 

Dee: I’m working on something Venessa Hart and I started years ago. It’s the story of a man just about to win his dream job when his world is turned upside down. Will he ignore the people who need him and go for the dream job, or risk all for the woman who’s invaded his dreams?

  

Anne: Ooo, that sounds good. Is it sexy?

  

Dee: Does a bee make honey? Do fish swim in the sea? Does CJ like to—

  

Anne: We get the picture. My work in progress is the first in a series called Five Card Studs. I’m finishing the first, Dealer’s Choice, about a man who does not want to get married so he dates only women he knows he could never live with—let’s say, women whose bells don’t all ring in the belfry. One of his dates thinks he’s a cousin of Spock’s when he tells her he’s a volcanologist.

 

 Hellion: *laughing* That sounds hilarious! Where do you usually get your ideas? Do you brainstorm with critique partners…or people off the street?

 

 Dee: I always have ideas that I think would make a good book. I should write them down but I always think the idea is so good I don’t need to. *tapping her chin* I wonder how bestselling ideas I’ve forgotten…?

 

Anne: I get a lot of ideas from country music, and just from driving. Put me in a car and head it east or west, and in a few hours I’ll have three or four story ideas.

  

Dee: Anne and I brainstorm, of course, but we’re so much alike it’s like talking to myself. *LOL*

 

 Anne: We have wonderful critique partners who talk plot and characters at the drop of a hat. Without them, who knows where our books would be?

  

Hellion: Let’s hear it for the CPs! Anne, you mentioned getting ideas while you drove. Which of you is the better driver? And when is the last time you two have taken a cross-country trip together? What are you two like on vacation?

  

Dee: We fight all the time on trips because we both like driving. I usually win.

 

Anne: *pouting* You never stop at interesting places when we travel. I like to add a little shopping to my trips and you just zip on down the road.

  

Dee: The purpose of a road trip is to get to your destination, not shopping. Get over it. We drove to Virginia last December and it was, “Oh, look at that Christmas shop,” or “That gift area looks interesting,” all the way. I like to get in the car and drive. It would take Anne two weeks to go coast to coast if I let her behind the wheel.

  

CJ: I like a fast woman.

 

 Dee: *purring* And I like a man who takes his time.

 

 Anne: Criminy!

 

 Hellion: Where is your favorite place to shop? What do find yourself always buying, even though you might have a dozen of them already?

 

 Dee: I love searching out new things at AdamandEve.com. Whoo! The toys they have! A woman could stay in orbit all the time spending wisely there—and I do.

 

 Anne: So that’s why we never have any batteries in the house!

 

 Dee: *stroking CJ’s arm* Not that a woman has need of toys with you around, Captain.

 

 CJ: I should say not! But a bit of rum is never amiss… *gropes Dee as she giggles*

  

Anne: *sighing with disgust, then crossing her arms and looking away* I’m a sucker for QVC. I love their jewelry shows and would spend thousands of dollars if I had it.

 

Hellion: Well, you know what they say: diamonds are a girl’s best friend. If you had a Sunday to yourself, how would you spend it?

  

Dee: We usually have Sundays to ourselves. Well, with Jack of course. Funny, I never thought before how that’s a good start to a ménage story.

 

 Anne: Don’t even think it! I don’t sleep late usually, Hellion. I get up, have a cup of coffee and often a bagel. Later, we go out for breakfast, then we watch TV shows I’ve taped during the week. Maybe we take a nap. Lazy days together are the best.

  

Dee: I still think a ménage between two sisters and one of their husbands would make a good book. One sister would be adventurous and the other shy. Just like us, Anne!

  

CJ: *staring at Hellion curiously* Are you blushing, Hellie? *looks at Dee in awe* I can’t even make her blush, and believe me, I try. Hard. *Hellion blushes harder*

  

Dee: No need to blush, Sweetie. I wouldn’t make you one of the sisters, though CJ here would make a great husband in the story. Would you like to be I bed with two women, CJ?

  

CJ: Well, there’s four of us now. *roguish grin* Four’s a nice round number. Once I was in bed with five women, and that was a bit tricky, but I think I have the kinks worked out and I’m sure I could….

  

Anne: Hellion, do something!

 

Hellion: *covering CJ’s mouth* Jolly good, okay, I think it’s time to wind this up, shall we? I’m sure the crew and ‘lubbers have questions and comments for Dee and Anne. Okay?

 

Dee: Ask away, everyone!

 

Anne: Yes, please. I’d be happy to answer any questions you have.

As I near “the End” of my book, revisions cast their dark shadow over my future.   *cue menacing music* dun dun dahhhhh .

While I’ve been writing, I’ve stopped and made comments on a page in my journal called the “To Be Revised” page.  I decided that instead of stopping constantly to fix the things I was sure would need to be fixed later I would write them down so I could remember them when I trotted back through. 

Though many of my “To Be Revised” notes are specific and of no use to you (and of questionable use to me), there are some that seem general and perhaps applicable to everyone.  Here are a few snippets:

-          Check for any adverbs I can avoid

-          Plot out motivation to make certain it is consistent throughout

-          Check for plot holes

-          Strengthen verbs

As I read back through these notes, I started surfing around online to find other writing rules that might help direct me through my revising.  Here are some fun ones:

Kurt Vonnegut’s eight rules for writing fiction:

1. Use the time of a total stranger in such a way that he or she will not feel the time was wasted.

2. Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for.

3. Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.

4. Every sentence must do one of two things -- reveal character or advance the action.

5. Start as close to the end as possible.

6. Be a sadist. No matter how sweet and innocent your leading characters, make awful things happen to them -- in order that the reader may see what they are made of.

7. Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia.

8. Give your readers as much information as possible as soon as possible. To heck with suspense. Readers should have such complete understanding of what is going on, where and why, that they could finish the story themselves, should cockroaches eat the last few pages.

-- Vonnegut, Kurt Vonnegut, Bagombo Snuff Box: Uncollected Short Fiction (New York: G.P. Putnam's Sons 1999), 9-10.

Sort of an interesting take, huh?  I particularly like the cockroaches bit.

Here’s George Orwell’s list, though it’s more grammar driven than fiction driven:

1.       Never use a metaphor, simile or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print.

2.       Never use a long word where a short one will do.

3.       If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.

4.       Never use the passive where you can use the active.

5.       Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.

6.       Break any of these rules sooner than say anything barbarous.

George Orwell, Politics and the English Language (Horizon, 1946)

That last one is the greatest reminder to me not to get carried away trying to follow "the rules." 

In the end, there are always exceptions to every rule.

What writing rule do you have the most trouble with?  What writing rule do you think is complete bunk?  What writing rule do you think is vital to good fiction (my personal favorite being show, don't tell)?

I stood at the edge. My hair floated behind me like a black cloak protecting me from evil. Today the wind blew fierce, chilling me to the bone. Yet, I didn’t shiver in fear. I didn’t shrink back from the edge. I embraced it. The waves crashed into the rocks below. The jagged rocks of despair. I could not feel lonely here. Here was my destiny. I belonged here among the broken edges.

 

I rocked forward. The wind carried me to my tip toes. I could feel the freedom within my grasp. I was a heartbeat away. All I had to do was let go. Let go and embrace the chance. The risk. To take it in. For the moment and just be myself. I wanted this more than anything. I just wanted to be with him one last time before he was no more than a whisper. I wanted it to be real.

 

This was the only way.

 

I took a deep breath. The salt water spray burned my nose, stung my eyes, but I didn’t look away from the horizon. The edge of eternity hovered within my reach. Reminded me of why I came here. The darkness rolling in would be my salvation. It would carry me away when I didn’t think it was possible. At my back, the sun burned bright. The struggle between good and evil. And I was in the middle. I would always been stuck. I had to take charge of my future.

 

I stood at the edge. Looking out.

 

My heart was timed to the crashing of waves. With each moment, my heart grew heavier. A gust of wind blew over the cliff and carried me closer. Closer to flying. I wanted wings. I wanted to fly. I wanted that freedom. For just once in my life.

 

I didn’t think.

 

I didn’t look.

 

I was airborne.

 

The way the wind fluttered through the long layers of my dress made me feel like I was floating. The breath in my lungs was nonexistent. The black oblivion swallowed me whole and pushed me further down.

 

And I embraced the darkness. It was my soul. It was my guiding light.

 

It was my eternity. With him.

 

 

When writing a great love story, there is always tragedy before eternal bliss. What’s the biggest obstacle your hero/heroine face and how do they connect? For our readers, what’s the best black moment you’ve ever read?

Hellion: *emerges from cabin with her writing notebook, which she flings out into the ocean*

 

Terrio: What’s wrong, Hellion? *watching another ten notebooks flying out with it* I thought you were working on Adam’s story?

 

Hellion: I suck. I don’t know what I was thinking. I had the idea in front of me. I’ve been writing in my notebook for days, and I thought I finally had a grasp on the scene I needed to work on. I mean, Fish Out of Water: Adam & Eve have to live in Vegas. I mean, you can’t get any more Fish Out of Water than that!

 

Marnee: I wouldn’t think so. You’re not really going to toss your laptop, are you?

 

Hellion: *looking at her HP thoughtfully and the sticker decal of Jack on it* I was thinking about it. I mean, I’m not going to use it for writing since I’ve given that up.

 

Terrio: Be practical. If you toss your computer, you won’t be able to download Hotties from the internet.

 

Hellion: *putting the computer back in its bag, seating herself on the stairwell to the upperdeck, pouting* Oh, what’s the use of Hotties to download now that I no longer have a profession.

 

Marnee: Aww, Hellion, you have a profession: you’re a writer. You’re not going to give that up if you throw out all your notebooks. You’ll be back to scratching out ideas on napkins in a few days, I know. The last time you threw out your notebooks, you started writing ideas on Jack, but the ink blurred with his tattoos and you were mad you’d lost some really great dialogue bits. Now why don’t you get to the gist of what’s really going on? What happened?

 

Hellion: Well, I opened my Word document and scrolled to the end of the scene I was working on. Adam and Eve have just been sent to Vegas, and I was going to write the scene where they see their new living situation. Believe me, it’s no mansion in Heaven. And no KitchenAids.

 

Terrio: *baffled* KitchenAids?

 

Marnee: That does sound Spartan. Sounds good so far. What happened?

 

Hellion: I don’t know. I put my fingers on the keyboard, and this voice came in my head and said, “This is the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard.”

 

Terrio: You’re always hearing voices. You’ve never let it bother you before.

 

Hellion: But it wasn’t one of the characters. This is someone else. Someone not in the book.

Marnee: Someone clearly bitchy that he didn’t get a part, if you want my opinion. Why are you listening to him? What credentials does he have?

 

Hellion: You know, I don’t know. If you heard him, it was like God was speaking.

 

Terrio: God is more diplomatic.

 

Hellion: Clearly you haven’t read the Old Testament.

 

Sin: I know who it is. *printing out a Wanted Poster from her computer and waving the sheet in front of them* See? It’s your Inner Critic.

 

Lisa: I really hate that bitch.

 

Hellion: This wasn’t a woman. This was a man, I tell you.

 

Terrio: Your Inner Critic is a man? This explains so much about you.

 

Sin: *giving Hellion the sheet* The IC is androgynous, assuming the form which demoralizes you the most. Or what Hellion would say, if she weren’t too busy moping to give the lecture, the IC is like one of those Harry Potter dementor thingies. *waves hand vaguely, clearly having no idea what a dementor looks like*

 

Terrio: I still haven’t read those books.

 

Hellion: *grumpily* Or seen the movies.

 

Sin: Anyway, there is only one cure for getting rid of an IC. You’re going to have to wash him out. *holds up a bottle of “Rid Your Inner Critic” shampoo and cheeses at the audience with a  Vanna White flourish* See, the instructions are simple: wet, lather, and repeat.

 

Terrio: Now where have I heard that…oh, never mind. *nervous laugh* Hormones.

 

Marnee: *dumping a bucket of water over Hellion’s head as Hellion gasps in shock* Gosh, that felt good. I hadn’t realized how much I’d wanted to do…

 

Sin: *squirting shampoo on Hellion, who is still screeching* Okay, now you have to sing the song with it. It doesn’t work if you don’t sing the song.

 

Hellion: *looking like a pissed off half-drowned cat, glaring at crewmembers who seem oblivious* This is not going to work. *scrubbing at her hair*

 

Sin: That is not how the song starts, Hellie. Come on, come on… *prompts* I’m gonna wash that bitch right out of my head…

 

Lisa, Terrio, Marnee: I’m gonna wash that bitch right out of my head

 

Hellion: *glowering* I’m gonna wash that bitch right out of my head

 

LTM: And send her on her way. *gesturing hand waves*

 

Hellion: *reluctantly doing the hand waves*

I’m gonna wave that bitch right off my page

            I’m gonna wave that bitch right off my page

            I’m gonna wave that bitch right off my page

            And send her on her way.

 

LTM: Don’t toss your notebooks

 

Hellion: Get them back, get them back

 

LTM: Dry them out, dry them out

 

Hellion: Push her out, fly her out

            Don’t delay, show her the door!

 

LTM: Yea, Hellion!

 

Hellion: I’m gonna wash that bitch right outa my head,

I’m gonna wash that man right outa my head,

I'm gonna wash that man right outa my head,

And send her on her way.

 

If your IC doesn’t get you,

If she says you’ll never succeed,

Don’t delay, leave this class,

Tell this witch to kiss your ass

Pretend you’ve gone deaf

And open your WIP and proceed

LTM: Oho! If you laugh at different paragraphs

If you root for different themes

Waste no time, drink no more

Show that witch what duct tape is for

Rub her out of your work-in-progress

Delete her straight from your scenes!

 

Hellion: You can't light the sheets with a prude in the room,

LTM: No!

Hellion: You can't make a comfortable thong,

LTM: No joke there

Hellion: You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs,

 

Terrio: Shit, is this a cooking blog? I thought the math one was mind-boggling. I hope she doesn’t cook with anything weird.

Sin: And you can't fix an IC when she's wrong!

Hellion & LTM: If her comments are hurtful and bitchy,

If you look for your handgun in the drawer

Waste no time, make the trade

Bury her out back with your gardening spade

Rub her out of your WIP

Call that bitch a whore

Oho! Oho!

 

I went to wash that bitch right outa my head,

I went to wash that bitch right outa my head,

I went to wash that bitch right outa my head,

And send her on her way.

LTM: She went to wash that bitch right outa her head,

She went to wash that bitch right outa her head,

She went to wash that bitch right outa her head,
And send her on her way!

 

Marnee: *dumping a rinsing bucket of water on Hellion as she does the Charlie’s Angels headshake* Again, I tell you, that’s just fun!

 

Hellion: Well, I’m certainly awake now. All right. I’ll take your advice. Bo’sun, after my notebooks, will you? I’ll need them dry if I’m ever going to finish that scene…

 

Terrio: Me? You threw them into the ocean; you get them out!

 

Hellion: I’m the captain and I say….

 

Marnee: *clearing throat, but arguing escalates* I think the Captain means to say…. *begins to shout to be heard over Hellion and Terrio*…what do you do to get rid of your Inner Critic? And is your Inner Critic a man or a woman? If you’re a writer, do you find yourself staring at the screen in horror—and how do you make yourself press on? If you’re a reader, has there been something you wanted to do, known you could do, but your Inner Critic nearly got the upperhand?

 

 

 

Yep. In the BEST. BAR. EVER.

If you're going to celebrate the 4th of July (and who doesn't?) and our freedom (Hello, pirates!) and drink lots of alcohol (see previous), you can't pick a better place than Norfolk, VA. So that's where we are. At least in spirit; and some of us a bit more spirited than others.

Everyone have a Happy Fourth of July, and we'll be back to our regularly scheduled programming on Sunday, July 6th. Next week our guest bloggers are twins: Dee S. Knight and Anne Krist (not to be missed!), and Hellion will demonstrate her singing skills (bring your earplugs) when she does a rendition of South Pacific.

Sorry I’m late this morning everyone.   Hopefully there’s still some rum left.  *dirty look at the pirates already smiling goofily.*

I just wrote a big black moment a couple of days ago.  I’ve been waiting for this part of my book for months now and I thought once I got there, it would be smooth sailing. 

Of course, I was wrong.

I didn’t want it to be over-emotional because too much drama seems silly.  But I wanted it to tug at my readers’ heartstrings too, in an honest way, a way that felt real to them.

Doing this was more difficult than I realized.  It seems attempting to string out your reader can string out the writer in the process.  *sigh*

I tried to write it from my heroine’s point of view, but she was the one who was really hurting in the scene (she already knew she was in love with the hero, she’s just waiting on his thick-headed self to get with the program).  Writing her pain first hand was a little too overdone.  So, I switched and wrote it in my hero’s point of view.

It worked for me (I hope) because my hero acted like a real jerk.   He said some things that, as one of the pirates pointed out, would have been hard to forgive if we hadn’t seen his motivation from his perspective. 

Then we watch my heroine’s pain from his POV, where it’s still apparent, but not so hit-you-over-the-head as to be overdramatic (I hope).

At the end, I cried, railing at him for being so stubborn and trying to tell her that it would be alright if she just didn’t give up on him.

Hopefully that’s how my reader feels about it after their read as well.

Have you ever written a black moment and if so, was it easy or difficult for you?  How did you get through?  Have you ever read a black moment in a book that really tugged at your heart?  Or one that you just didn’t connect with for some reason?  Why?

I'm going to keep this short and relatively not sweet. Because I'm not much for sweet. And inspiration is only everywhere when you're actually paying attention which isn't easy when horns are blaring, A/C units are busting, Medicare is screwing you, accounts payable is sucking wind, jet lag is wrapped around you like a wet blanket on a hot day.

I've spent the last month unable to get any words out. I've relied on my trust old paper notebook, and have written some things but nothing comes to me when I'm on the computer. The pressure of the keyboard- the wicked, wicked keyboard. The blank page with the blinking cursor. Mocking you for your ignorance. Your inability to be creative. The laptop is not my friend.

So I ask you today-

What do you write for when you don't want to write anymore? When inspiration has flown the coup, who picks up the emotional pieces left behind?

As a writer, I pick up my own pieces and move on quietly. I'm still banging out the word count. I'm about 20k behind now. But the trick is to not panic. No head games mean I can get back on track. So tell me what games you play with yourself to keep you going?  And if nothing else, let's talk about lack of inspiration. Or strippers. Whichever is better.